My boyfriend is 26 and lives with his parents, doesn't work, and never pays for things

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I have one word for you: PARASITE./quote]

Boom Roasted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I have one word for you: PARASITE.

Boom Roasted.

[Anonymous]

Find an older guy on the side who treats you right, spoils you and pleases you nonstop and find out what you are missing. Then keep the dude on the side and the BF or dump the BF. You'll be shocked to find out how it really can be. Trust me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He has no savings. I travel out of state to see him and have to drive us everywhere and pay for things if we want to do stuff. I stay at his parent's house. They smoke and I do not like smoke, but I try to put up wiith it or stay away from it. It makes them mad when I try and avoid the smoke because they see it as me being rude. He cannot travel to me because he has no money and isn't working or in school. He's been unemployed for a little over a year now and says he's looking for work, but he plays computer games all the time.

The thing is, he is the sweetest boyfriend I have ever been with. I'm a few years older than him. In the beginning he spent almost all the money he made on me. But then he got fed up with his job and quit it. He doesn't have any education post high school. He can work in a few skilled trades at an entry-level status, but he s not able to earn much. His parents don't push him to go out and get a job. He also doesn't have a license. They don't push him to get this either. His mom said they used to try to help him with his driving skills but he ran right through a four way stop or something and that was the end of that. His dad yelled at him that he put in his resignation like three times.

I know all this doesn't sound good, but he is very good to me, kind, gentle, loving, sweet. I have talked to him many times about getting a job and he will say stuff like "No one is hiring" or he has tried, blah blah.

Also, he told me a few months ago he would be starting a course to get his CNC license or something and then it never panned out. I don't know what to do anymore. We get in arguments over money sometimes. It makes me feel awful. I don't feel like he's using me at all. He never asks me to buy him anything. He never takes money from me. And once I offered to pay for his course he wanted to do and he said he would never take my money. His parents don't have money to send him to school and don't encourage him to take on student loans either.

I've encouraged him to get his license, but his dad lets him drive without a license sometimes and I've told him how bad this is. He sometimes does it when I'm not in the state. He talks about wanting to get married and have a baby. And I truly would love to marry him, but I can't until he is working.

How is he “good” to you?

Specifically.

He is always there for me. He cares about me, he listens to everything I have to say intently. He tells me he loves me and makes me feel beautiful. He says it every day. He is very attentive. He's very affectionate, kind, caring. He is sensitive. If he had money, he would spend it all on me. In the beginning he did work and he spent pretty much every dime on me. I didn't ask him to, but he did. He is very compassionate and would do anything to help me.

He will not do anything to help you. He is choosing not to help himself. He choosing not to be a partner in this relationship. He is choosing not to make an effort to build a future with you. If he cared enough about you, would he not get some sort of employment to decrease the financial burden of you covering all expenses in the relationship? If he listened to all you said so intently, would he not heed some of what you are saying and make some changes. You are hearing plenty of empty words. Words without true action. He may be a very very nice man, but something is off and holding him back from progressing in life. Your man talks about wanting to get married and have a baby. What actions are being taken by him to work towards that? How does he see that working? Something is holding him back, or he simply does not love you enough to leave his parents house and video games behind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am not a troll. I have had many arguments with him over this. He finally applied to something recently and might get it, but it's a clerk position in a supermarket. He talks about wanting to move up (but he hasn't even got the job for sure yet). He grew up around that industry.

I'm not using him for a green card. We are both citizens.

OP, you cannot fix him. Again. You. Cannot. Fix. Him. This is who he is. Move on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP dump him and come to me. I am just 2 years older, out of grad school and currently working at an Engineering Company with little under $100,000 starting salary and several 1000 miles from my parents. I also know how to make a woman feel like a queen.

Why the hell would you want to date a loser like OP? Remember, water rises to its own level. She's as big of a loser as she is.

[Anonymous]

Haven't read a word of this thread, because the only obvious response is DUMP HIM. Now.

[Anonymous]

Those hardworking single guys are huge players because they can afford to date more than 1 woman. Teach your man how to drive but becareful when he starts getting independent with a job and car then he will start to cheat! Ps dont listen to the snarky bitches above nobody is a loser. Some of us are more greedy but all of us are human.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP dump him and come to me. I am just 2 years older, out of grad school and currently working at an Engineering Company with little under $100,000 starting salary and several 1000 miles from my parents. I also know how to make a woman feel like a queen.

Why the hell would you want to date a loser like OP? Remember, water rises to its own level. She's as big of a loser as she is.

Yeah whatever.

[Anonymous]

If he can’t even do anything to help himself, he really won’t do anything to help you. Why would you even think that? Open your eyes.

[Anonymous]

My guess would be that if you two did have a kid you would be doing all of the household chores, taking care of the baby, and working full time while he watches TV and/or plays video games. He sounds like one of those loser dudes on 16 and Pregnant. A lot of those guys were NICE until responsibility slapped them in the face, and then they turned into jerks. Also, you would grown resentful about the fact that you do 100% of everything.