SIL sucking up to my Mom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, don't listen to the bitter harpies. Talk to you brother. Forget your SIL; she's irrelevant. Your brother needs to step up and help. I'm not saying it's his responsibility to support his parents. We live in a society where it's no one's responsibility, and old people should go away and die already. But the fact that he doesn't help (or hire help) to clean and cook etc is not okay. He needs to bear his fair share.

Why? He doesn't live there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, don't listen to the bitter harpies. Talk to you brother. Forget your SIL; she's irrelevant. Your brother needs to step up and help. I'm not saying it's his responsibility to support his parents. We live in a society where it's no one's responsibility, and old people should go away and die already. But the fact that he doesn't help (or hire help) to clean and cook etc is not okay. He needs to bear his fair share.

Why? He doesn't live there.

Meaning? Let alone you don't know who lives where.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, don't listen to the bitter harpies. Talk to you brother. Forget your SIL; she's irrelevant. Your brother needs to step up and help. I'm not saying it's his responsibility to support his parents. We live in a society where it's no one's responsibility, and old people should go away and die already. But the fact that he doesn't help (or hire help) to clean and cook etc is not okay. He needs to bear his fair share.

Why? He doesn't live there.

Meaning? Let alone you don't know who lives where.

The OP stated that her brother paid bills when he lived with the parents. He stopped when he moved out. In my opinion that was a reasonable thing to do.
Op thinks he should keep paying, but why really?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, don't listen to the bitter harpies. Talk to you brother. Forget your SIL; she's irrelevant. Your brother needs to step up and help. I'm not saying it's his responsibility to support his parents. We live in a society where it's no one's responsibility, and old people should go away and die already. But the fact that he doesn't help (or hire help) to clean and cook etc is not okay. He needs to bear his fair share.

Why? He doesn't live there.

Meaning? Let alone you don't know who lives where.

The OP stated that her brother paid bills when he lived with the parents. He stopped when he moved out. In my opinion that was a reasonable thing to do.
Op thinks he should keep paying, but why really?

He should participate in caring for his elderly parents. Because he is their sun. Because he is a human being. If you don't get this, I'm afraid I can't explain to you why parents care for their children and vice versa.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, don't listen to the bitter harpies. Talk to you brother. Forget your SIL; she's irrelevant. Your brother needs to step up and help. I'm not saying it's his responsibility to support his parents. We live in a society where it's no one's responsibility, and old people should go away and die already. But the fact that he doesn't help (or hire help) to clean and cook etc is not okay. He needs to bear his fair share.

Why? He doesn't live there.

Meaning? Let alone you don't know who lives where.

The OP stated that her brother paid bills when he lived with the parents. He stopped when he moved out. In my opinion that was a reasonable thing to do.
Op thinks he should keep paying, but why really?

He should participate in caring for his elderly parents. Because he is their sun. Because he is a human being. If you don't get this, I'm afraid I can't explain to you why parents care for their children and vice versa.

They aren't elderly. The father is still working. The mother is retired, but cares for her grandchildren all day. The parents have not asked the son for money, per the OP. Only the OP thinks that he needs to pay. The 'caretaking' appears to be running a few errands, which the OP should do in exchange for the free daycare.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, don't listen to the bitter harpies. Talk to you brother. Forget your SIL; she's irrelevant. Your brother needs to step up and help. I'm not saying it's his responsibility to support his parents. We live in a society where it's no one's responsibility, and old people should go away and die already. But the fact that he doesn't help (or hire help) to clean and cook etc is not okay. He needs to bear his fair share.

Why? He doesn't live there.

Meaning? Let alone you don't know who lives where.

The OP stated that her brother paid bills when he lived with the parents. He stopped when he moved out. In my opinion that was a reasonable thing to do.
Op thinks he should keep paying, but why really?

He should participate in caring for his elderly parents. Because he is their sun. Because he is a human being. If you don't get this, I'm afraid I can't explain to you why parents care for their children and vice versa.

They aren't elderly. The father is still working. The mother is retired, but cares for her grandchildren all day. The parents have not asked the son for money, per the OP. Only the OP thinks that he needs to pay. The 'caretaking' appears to be running a few errands, which the OP should do in exchange for the free daycare.

This.

They are in their 60s for crying out loud! The only “caretaking” needs OP has identified are cash transfers.