SIL sucking up to my Mom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

So, pay your mom a fair price for the childcare, I'm sure that will help.

[Anonymous]

Again your brother paid for utilities when he was living with them. He moved out and married. Maybe your parents need to downsize or rent out a room. I can't see fault in your brothers behavior. You have two children and don't receive child support. I don't think you are in a position to judge.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Yea your brother sounds like a real monster wanting to start and support his own family

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

[Anonymous]

Why doesn't your baby daddy pay support? That is the person who should be paying in this situation. Yet, you want your brother to subsidize your parents.

Go get some support from baby daddy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

How is it that your mom requires caregiving, yet provides childcare to you?
Sounds like SIL is in school, how can you expect her to give money to your parents?

The need is still there??? OMG, this isn't your BIL's problem. This is more YOUR problem. You leech off your ill mother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

It doesn't sound like your mother needs a lot of care giving. She is apparently well enough to care for your 2 children. If you do chores for her that is sort of a minimal exchange on your part, don't you think?

[Anonymous]

Stop acting like this is a family problem. This is a problem between your mom and dad.

[Anonymous]

This is perhaps the most entitled poster I have come across on this forum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is perhaps the most entitled poster I have come across on this forum.

+1 she is so focused on her brother but doesn't see her own doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

How is it that your mom requires caregiving, yet provides childcare to you?
Sounds like SIL is in school, how can you expect her to give money to your parents?

The need is still there??? OMG, this isn't your BIL's problem. This is more YOUR problem. You leech off your ill mother.

She has flare ups of pain and incapacity. I try to take the burden off my Dad by preparing her meals, cleaning, grocery shopping for them, etc.

SIL and my brother both make very good money, way more than I do. I understand my brothers priorities shifted when he got married - but it’s like he forgot about his original family and their needs too. I mentioned to him at thanksgiving that my parents needed money, they were drowning in hospital bills and he didn’t say anything about it. No cash at Christmas. Nothing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

How is it that your mom requires caregiving, yet provides childcare to you?
Sounds like SIL is in school, how can you expect her to give money to your parents?

The need is still there??? OMG, this isn't your BIL's problem. This is more YOUR problem. You leech off your ill mother.

She has flare ups of pain and incapacity. I try to take the burden off my Dad by preparing her meals, cleaning, grocery shopping for them, etc.

SIL and my brother both make very good money, way more than I do. I understand my brothers priorities shifted when he got married - but it’s like he forgot about his original family and their needs too. I mentioned to him at thanksgiving that my parents needed money, they were drowning in hospital bills and he didn’t say anything about it. No cash at Christmas. Nothing.

I think you are a troll.
You have some nerve asking for money. Your brother and his wife are smarter than you, they don't have kids they can't afford, they continue their education. You don't.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

How is it that your mom requires caregiving, yet provides childcare to you?
Sounds like SIL is in school, how can you expect her to give money to your parents?

The need is still there??? OMG, this isn't your BIL's problem. This is more YOUR problem. You leech off your ill mother.

She has flare ups of pain and incapacity. I try to take the burden off my Dad by preparing her meals, cleaning, grocery shopping for them, etc.

SIL and my brother both make very good money, way more than I do. I understand my brothers priorities shifted when he got married - but it’s like he forgot about his original family and their needs too. I mentioned to him at thanksgiving that my parents needed money, they were drowning in hospital bills and he didn’t say anything about it. No cash at Christmas. Nothing.

I'm worth 3 million and my parents made bad financial choices. I never give them money. It's not my responsibility. I ask nothing of them. They should have been smarter.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mom isn’t able to work, she hasn’t been working for years so it’s a struggle for my dad to support both of them financially on top of her medical bills. My brother used to pay a lot of their utilities prior to marriage when he wasn’t deployed overseas and lived with them.

I just feel like he got married and everything he helped our parents with went to the wayside and he doesn’t even try anymore.

Wait, your dad is around too? She sounded like an elderly widow in your op. How old are your parents? How old is your brother?

Brother is 36. Father is 62, my mom is 58. SIL is 29.

My parents went through some financial challenges when my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in her late 40s. She’s been in remission for 6+ years now but she wants to spend as much time with her grandchildren, hence why she offers childcare. I would pay them if I could, but I’m not in a position financially. My brother really helped with some of that burden and was there for my mom all the years she was sick, but now all support has stopped even though the need is still there. My mom has nerve pain and had a stroke during treatment so she’s not 100%.

It’s a very hard place for our family to be. My SIL is going back to school for her masters in nursing, which frustrates me because she’s a NURSE but can’t offer to do any caregiving for her own MIL when she’s sick?

How is it that your mom requires caregiving, yet provides childcare to you?
Sounds like SIL is in school, how can you expect her to give money to your parents?

The need is still there??? OMG, this isn't your BIL's problem. This is more YOUR problem. You leech off your ill mother.

She has flare ups of pain and incapacity. I try to take the burden off my Dad by preparing her meals, cleaning, grocery shopping for them, etc.

SIL and my brother both make very good money, way more than I do. I understand my brothers priorities shifted when he got married - but it’s like he forgot about his original family and their needs too. I mentioned to him at thanksgiving that my parents needed money, they were drowning in hospital bills and he didn’t say anything about it. No cash at Christmas. Nothing.

Your parents are helping you as much or more than you are helping them. How is this relevant to your SIL and a flower arrangement?