To disclose HFA diagnosis to teen or not? 17 year old

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would hold off and reevaluate in six months.

This !!!!!!

[Anonymous]

OP- the fact is that no matter how the risk of how he takes in the new diagnosis, at 17, it's his right to know. I would only budge on this if the information was somehow dangerous to him (e,g. he's in a spiriling depression).
My son is ten, we told him he has ADHD. It's hard- he wants to be "normal." I think long term he has the best chance of improving his symptoms if he has the facts--but I do feel your pain.

[Anonymous]

I would let him get settled at college and then think about the discussions at Spring Break or next summer. He's on a good track and feeling good about himself. That will be a huge boost going in to college and you don't want anything to disrupt that confidence and his ability to make connections with people.

[Anonymous]

OP, There's a lot of good advice and some bad advice on this thread but the important points for me are the following.
1. This doesn't sound like a real diagnosis. Is the psychologist trained in autism? Did she or he run an ADOS? If not, I wouldn't trust the diagnosis. It's a spectrum and very hard for someone without training to determine where the line is drawn. Lots of people have autistic characteristics (what wife hasn't complained about her husband being oblivious or rigid or whatever) but to get a diagnosis it has to impact your life pretty significantly. I don't see that this is impacting your child's life to that level. Most teens I know that are on the spectrum and very high functioning have significant challenges making friends, dealing with schedule changes, having repetitive behaviors and other issues that are pretty obvious. You child doesn't seem to be like this.
2. None of the people on this thread know your child like you do and your gut tells you he might react negatively to this diagnosis. If you're like any other special needs mom you really know your kid because you've been analyzing his every move since he started having issues. I would trust your instincts in this case.
3. Just because you're not telling him now doesn't mean the decision is forever. If he has new difficulties in college you could revisit your decision. The timing of telling him before he's going to college, when he's doing well, seems very risky.

[Anonymous]

You need to get a second opinion. I would not do anything without one. Both of you need facts. Why assume now all the other doctors were wrong? If he is indeed HFA then of course he needs to know, but you need a formal diagnosis.