Bringing your own toys to the playground-what's the etiquette?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - DCUM is NEVER unanimous, and in this case, it is. You are wrong. That dad had EVERY right to bring the frisbee to the tot lot.

Um, no, it is not unanimous in this case.

Of course the dad has every right to bring a toy to a playground, but he should come with the expectation that other kids are going to be interested in it and set that expectation with his kid, too. His kid is old enough to learn about social interaction in a public place; an 18 month old, not so much.

It's weird and unsettling to me that so many here believe that a basic decency like generosity - about a $5 toy, no less - is "wrong."

You said "Of course the dad has every right to bring a toy to a playground" -- so you are in fact agreeing with the rest of us. Yes, it would have been more polite to include the toddler, but she is saying he shouldn't have brought it AT ALL. Which is not the case.

[Anonymous]

Sharing issues aside, I don't think a frisbee is an appropriate toy to bring to a small playground for 0-3 yr olds. I saw a mom get whacked in the head w a frisbee at a playground a few weeks ago. She nearly fell over and seemed disoriented for awhile after. If she had been a 0-3 yr old it could have been much worse.

I think it's fine to bring toys to the park in general though, as long as the park has space/is set up for use of that type of toy. Sure it's annoying when kids don't share but you can't control their behavior so it's best to just let it go and not let it bother you so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Be sure and tell us all the juicy details of how you got your ass-whupped when you tried to tell someone that they can't bring personal stuff to the playground OP...

Why would I bring it up to the father? It was just an annoying event that I posted about. Not every annoying event in one's life requires action and confrontation.

Wait, what?
So now you're saying the whole circumstance wasn't that serious was just a minor irritation and there was no need to actually say or do anything at the moment as minor irritations should be dismissed, but nonetheless you feel compelled to determinedly recruit anonymous opinion-allies so that you can...
So that you can do what exactly?
Should you secure the sufficient number of supportive comments to feel justified in your annoyance just what do you plan to do OP?
You gonna hold your head high and smile smugly knowing you're the far more sophisticated parent with proper etiquette the next time you're at the park and some kid is playing with a toy that your kid isn't invited to play with?
Is that the master plan you've come up with to get back at those inconsiderate personal-stuff-bringers...self-righteous indignation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Be sure and tell us all the juicy details of how you got your ass-whupped when you tried to tell someone that they can't bring personal stuff to the playground OP...

Why would I bring it up to the father? It was just an annoying event that I posted about. Not every annoying event in one's life requires action and confrontation.

Wait, what?
So now you're saying the whole circumstance wasn't that serious was just a minor irritation and there was no need to actually say or do anything at the moment as minor irritations should be dismissed, but nonetheless you feel compelled to determinedly recruit anonymous opinion-allies so that you can...
So that you can do what exactly?
Should you secure the sufficient number of supportive comments to feel justified in your annoyance just what do you plan to do OP?
You gonna hold your head high and smile smugly knowing you're the far more sophisticated parent with proper etiquette the next time you're at the park and some kid is playing with a toy that your kid isn't invited to play with?
Is that the master plan you've come up with to get back at those inconsiderate personal-stuff-bringers...self-righteous indignation?

Look I don't know the circumstances of your life, but in my life, this was not a major event. It was, in fact, a minor irritation. If it happens again, I'll be mildly irritated. I don't think it's worthy of a real life discussion. It's not even worthy of that stupid meme you posted. You can't confront every person for every perceived trespass/annoying thing. You come to DCUM, vent, and internalize the posters who agree with you. That's how the Internet works.

[Anonymous]

If you want to dictate what everyone else does in public space, you should probably move somewhere with a private yard.

If this guy lives in your "housing complex" then he probably doesn't have anywhere else besides this playground to play frisbee.

You are annoyed bc he created extra work for you.

[Anonymous]

This is one ofthe most bizarre threads I have seen on here. I just don't get it. There are other more important things to worry about. Go to the park, have fun, be decent to neighbors. Bring a toy or not it is so not important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is one ofthe most bizarre threads I have seen on here. I just don't get it. There are other more important things to worry about. Go to the park, have fun, be decent to neighbors. Bring a toy or not it is so not important.

No one in this area knows how to have fun. Well, maybe except for a few couples in Centreville who are stuck in the 80s....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Be sure and tell us all the juicy details of how you got your ass-whupped when you tried to tell someone that they can't bring personal stuff to the playground OP...

Why would I bring it up to the father? It was just an annoying event that I posted about. Not every annoying event in one's life requires action and confrontation.

Wait, what?
So now you're saying the whole circumstance wasn't that serious was just a minor irritation and there was no need to actually say or do anything at the moment as minor irritations should be dismissed, but nonetheless you feel compelled to determinedly recruit anonymous opinion-allies so that you can...
So that you can do what exactly?
Should you secure the sufficient number of supportive comments to feel justified in your annoyance just what do you plan to do OP?
You gonna hold your head high and smile smugly knowing you're the far more sophisticated parent with proper etiquette the next time you're at the park and some kid is playing with a toy that your kid isn't invited to play with?
Is that the master plan you've come up with to get back at those inconsiderate personal-stuff-bringers...self-righteous indignation?

Look I don't know the circumstances of your life, but in my life, this was not a major event. It was, in fact, a minor irritation. If it happens again, I'll be mildly irritated. I don't think it's worthy of a real life discussion. It's not even worthy of that stupid meme you posted. You can't confront every person for every perceived trespass/annoying thing. You come to DCUM, vent, and internalize the posters who agree with you. That's how the Internet works.

Yeah but you seem perturbed by the fact that there aren't as many people agreeing with you as you expected when you initially posted the details of that man (GASP!!) playing with his son...awful, just awful.
So if it's not a major event and if it's barely even worth venting about then why the insistence on rebuking any opinion expressed about the situation that doesn't align with your own interpretations?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Of course they can bring their own toy. No, they don't have to share while they are actively playing with it. No one ever has to share (whether they are playing with it or not)...but offering turns is always nice and appreciated. To little kids, babies are annoying and can ruin games because they want to grab everything and 'get in the way'. The father was there to play with his kid, not yours. That's just kind of how it goes.

+1. We lived in a small apartment until our kid was 5. There was a school playground across the street. This (or other nearby playgrounds/parks) is where nearly all outdoor play occurred. We would bring, at various times, his big wheel, bike, balls, chalk, frisbees, etc. We had him share often, depending on the context. But it's not always practical.
The dad & his kid have nothing to do with you and your kid. All kinds of things entice and distract toddlers. It's up to the parents to redirect/comfort/deal with the toddler. It's certainly not up to anyone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - DCUM is NEVER unanimous, and in this case, it is. You are wrong. That dad had EVERY right to bring the frisbee to the tot lot.

Um, no, it is not unanimous in this case.

Of course the dad has every right to bring a toy to a playground, but he should come with the expectation that other kids are going to be interested in it and set that expectation with his kid, too. His kid is old enough to learn about social interaction in a public place; an 18 month old, not so much.

It's weird and unsettling to me that so many here believe that a basic decency like generosity - about a $5 toy, no less - is "wrong."

You said "Of course the dad has every right to bring a toy to a playground" -- so you are in fact agreeing with the rest of us. Yes, it would have been more polite to include the toddler, but she is saying he shouldn't have brought it AT ALL. Which is not the case.

She is? Where? The title of the thread is "Bringing your own toys to the playground-what's the etiquette?"

But don't let that get in the way of your outraged pile on. Apparently, the world is safely free of etiquette.

[Anonymous]

So if I bring an apple for my kid as a snack, am I supposed to share with you because your kid is distracted and wants one?

Haha NOPE!! Youre crazy op.

[Anonymous]

I agree with OP. I don't think a tot lot is an appropriate space for a game of frisbee. Parks are fine, not tot lots.

I'm all for bringing toys to a park or playground, but DS knows if he brings a toy he may be asked to share it (talking about trucks or balls, not bikes or scooters).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - DCUM is NEVER unanimous, and in this case, it is. You are wrong. That dad had EVERY right to bring the frisbee to the tot lot.

Um, no, it is not unanimous in this case.

Of course the dad has every right to bring a toy to a playground, but he should come with the expectation that other kids are going to be interested in it and set that expectation with his kid, too. His kid is old enough to learn about social interaction in a public place; an 18 month old, not so much.

It's weird and unsettling to me that so many here believe that a basic decency like generosity - about a $5 toy, no less - is "wrong."

You said "Of course the dad has every right to bring a toy to a playground" -- so you are in fact agreeing with the rest of us. Yes, it would have been more polite to include the toddler, but she is saying he shouldn't have brought it AT ALL. Which is not the case.

She is? Where?

Back on Page 4

Anonymous wrote:
Do you think the father and son should've invited your son to play? That's ridiculous. It's a public park. You did the right thing by redircting your child.


I think:
1-they shouldn't have brought it. The playground is an oversized tot lot, not really a "park". Might have been more convenient for them to come there than the park, but bringing your private toys to a play area for very young kids is annoying bc young kids are going to be interested.
2-the dad should have said SOMETHING when his kid shrieked "no baby!" whenever my kid looked at him. It was rude and set up an awkward dynamic.
3-the dad could have extended a nice gesture when their damn frisbee kept landing at my son's feet even after I relocated us to the other side of the play equipment. He could have invited my son to get it and hand it back to them. He saw how interested my son was in it. That is what I would have done if my toy was a constant and obvious distraction to another child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here, just out of curiosity, if the toy was not a frisbee but one of those remote controlled helicopters-would your answer still be the same? Again, my issue isn't that people have to play with my kid (I'd hardly expect anyone to let my kid touch a remote/helicopter) but that bringing your own toys to a small 0-3 playground is distracting and annoying.

Real life is frustrating and annoying, OP. Toughen up. Honestly, how do you get through the day being such a snowflake?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Obviously I know there's no obligation to play with my kid. My question is more about whether it is annoying when people bring their own toys to a toddler playground with the expectation that it is not going to be a distraction/object of interest for other kids. For example, there are plenty of times that I have thought about bringing a toy to story time for my child, but I've always refrained because I don't want the toy to be an object of contention.

?

You are free to roll however you like. And you are free to make rules for your kid and his toys.

But you can't make rules for other people at the playground.

This is how it works:

1. You play with your kid.
2. Other parents play with their kids.
3. The playground equipment belongs to the community, and everyone must take turns.
4. Nobody must share their toys---they can choose to, but it's not required.
5. Parents must control their own kids (and only their own kids) to make sure they aren't annoying others.

That's it.