For the love of God Please stop bringing your babies to bars for girl's night out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea why anyone has a problem with an infant being in a quiet upscale wine bar. This isn't selfish millennials -- unless the baby starts crying. But from what I gather, these were some nice friends out with a quiet well behaved baby. Why would anyone at the bar have a problem with it? The baby isn't doing anything to offend anyone else, other than by virtue of being there. The other PPs are pissed just because they "think" it shouldn't happen. They should get over themselves, just like people who "thought" interracial dating and same-sex marriages were taboo should get over themselves. Yeah, a slightly more extreme example, but the analogy still sticks: That the activity isn't hurting anyone so why do they care?

I think it's great the friends were all able to connect, even though a baby can sometimes change the dynamic of friendships. When I had a baby, most of my girlfriends were (and continue to be) single and/or childless. I met moms through mom groups, and while I made a few friends in the groups, by and large I found these folks painfully boring and not people I would have been friends with in the absence of kids. I'm glad I've been able to stay tight with my childless friends, and that often means going to bars, hipster restaurants, urban backyards and other random places that you may not want to bring your friends. Some times other folks have kids there, which is great. But life goes on if it's just mom, dad and son.

Also - someone suggested that it was horrible to leave an infant bored like that without stimulation in a bar. But what about all you suburbanites who spend 2 hours a day in the car while your infants just stare at the backseat? That's so unstimulating. It's okay if infants spend some time not being stimulated and with their own thoughts. I suspect this woman spends less time at wine bars than your kids spend blankly in the carseat.

Actually as a child development masters, I can tell you that a restaurant or bar at that time of night for a baby is way too much stimulation for a baby's brain. The natural rhythms of a baby should be winding down around 4 pm (think clean slate in the morning when a baby wakes - so the most stimulation then and wind down later in the evening).

Okay but then by your logic, babies should not do any stimulating activities after 4pm? No having the tv on in the background while dad watches the news at 6pm? No restaurants whatsoever, even at the kid-friendly hour of 5pm? No going to Target at 5pm, which has major stimulation involving generator noise and fluorescent lights (this was my son's biggest stimulation no-no up to age 6 months)? That may be the right answer, but I hardly think that all the PPs clutching pearls about a baby in a bar are equally worked up about those other activities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK I have a feeling this was a classy wine bar instead of the honky tonk bar that pps are making it out to be. Who knows, maybe it was someone's birthday or the babysitter cancelled. As long as the baby didn't mind, I don't see the big deal. I have more of an issue with 5-7 year olds in bars. And last time I saw kids in a bar they were wearing pajamas!

Seriously?


Wow. I think a baby in a bar after 8 pm inappropriate (even if a nice restaurant/bar). An older child/toddler definitely.

If you have enough money to go to these places you can afford a sitter. I know a lot of people are indifferent but that is the general trend to not be considerate of others. It boils down to - is this a place and time of day meant for that audience. Taking a child to cultural events is very different than honky tonks or wine bars.

But not a single poster has yet explained WHY it is not considerate to others to bring a non-crying baby to a WINE bar at 9pm. How does this affect you? Why does it make a difference to YOU if it happens at 6pm?

(And have some of you people ever been to a bar since college? The way you're talking and wine bars and honky tonk bars in the same sentence makes me think you don't get out much. You know a wine bar basically feels like a hotel bar/restaurant, right?)

Actually many posters have said why -- we as adults go to adult places at adult times of night so we do not have to see/be around children. For those of us NOT selfish we pay a sitter to care for our kids to go out and catch up with friends. I personally go to places where I shouldn't be seeing children so I do not think of my own. I go out with friends twice a month and it is a form of escape. A lot of posters feel the same way. This mother is rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When wealthy white parents do it in nice bars, it's fine. When poor people of color do it at dive bars, it's child abuse.

+1 would some of these people that are saying myob be ok with a man taking his baby to a strip bar.. so long as there is no smoking allowed?

strip bars are not appropriate for children, period. Restaurants, pubs, wine bars, etc - completely fine as long as you're not bothering other people. If you can't tell the difference between a strip bar and a pub/restaurant/wine bar - then you're a retard.

Depends on the bar, doesn't it? Some bars are really loud. I saw a couple bring their newborn to a loud bar, no smoking, but it was loud. Yep, I passed judgement. Some bars don't allow anyone under 21. I'm guessing that includes children and babies. Why would they exclude babies, you think? Because it's not appropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK I have a feeling this was a classy wine bar instead of the honky tonk bar that pps are making it out to be. Who knows, maybe it was someone's birthday or the babysitter cancelled. As long as the baby didn't mind, I don't see the big deal. I have more of an issue with 5-7 year olds in bars. And last time I saw kids in a bar they were wearing pajamas!

Seriously?


Wow. I think a baby in a bar after 8 pm inappropriate (even if a nice restaurant/bar). An older child/toddler definitely.

If you have enough money to go to these places you can afford a sitter. I know a lot of people are indifferent but that is the general trend to not be considerate of others. It boils down to - is this a place and time of day meant for that audience. Taking a child to cultural events is very different than honky tonks or wine bars.

But not a single poster has yet explained WHY it is not considerate to others to bring a non-crying baby to a WINE bar at 9pm. How does this affect you? Why does it make a difference to YOU if it happens at 6pm?

(And have some of you people ever been to a bar since college? The way you're talking and wine bars and honky tonk bars in the same sentence makes me think you don't get out much. You know a wine bar basically feels like a hotel bar/restaurant, right?)

Actually many posters have said why -- we as adults go to adult places at adult times of night so we do not have to see/be around children. For those of us NOT selfish we pay a sitter to care for our kids to go out and catch up with friends. I personally go to places where I shouldn't be seeing children so I do not think of my own. I go out with friends twice a month and it is a form of escape. A lot of posters feel the same way. This mother is rude.

If the child is well behaved, the mother is not rude.

You, on the other hand, are spoiled and high maintenance. You have NO right to dictate who gets to go to the bar, unless you own that bar. And if you don't like the clientele at that particular bar - LEAVE! No one wants you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OK I have a feeling this was a classy wine bar instead of the honky tonk bar that pps are making it out to be. Who knows, maybe it was someone's birthday or the babysitter cancelled. As long as the baby didn't mind, I don't see the big deal. I have more of an issue with 5-7 year olds in bars. And last time I saw kids in a bar they were wearing pajamas!

Seriously?


Wow. I think a baby in a bar after 8 pm inappropriate (even if a nice restaurant/bar). An older child/toddler definitely.

If you have enough money to go to these places you can afford a sitter. I know a lot of people are indifferent but that is the general trend to not be considerate of others. It boils down to - is this a place and time of day meant for that audience. Taking a child to cultural events is very different than honky tonks or wine bars.

But not a single poster has yet explained WHY it is not considerate to others to bring a non-crying baby to a WINE bar at 9pm. How does this affect you? Why does it make a difference to YOU if it happens at 6pm?

(And have some of you people ever been to a bar since college? The way you're talking and wine bars and honky tonk bars in the same sentence makes me think you don't get out much. You know a wine bar basically feels like a hotel bar/restaurant, right?)

Actually many posters have said why -- we as adults go to adult places at adult times of night so we do not have to see/be around children. For those of us NOT selfish we pay a sitter to care for our kids to go out and catch up with friends. I personally go to places where I shouldn't be seeing children so I do not think of my own. I go out with friends twice a month and it is a form of escape. A lot of posters feel the same way. This mother is rude.

Okay, so because the mere sight of a baby makes you THINK of your baby, it's not appropriate to bring babies out to a bar?

You guys are conservative nut jobs who don't get out enough and you're just digging your heels into the most ridiculous argument "just because".

PS I've never taken my baby to a bar at 9pm. But it doesn't mean I have any problem with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have no idea why anyone has a problem with an infant being in a quiet upscale wine bar. This isn't selfish millennials -- unless the baby starts crying. But from what I gather, these were some nice friends out with a quiet well behaved baby. Why would anyone at the bar have a problem with it? The baby isn't doing anything to offend anyone else, other than by virtue of being there. The other PPs are pissed just because they "think" it shouldn't happen. They should get over themselves, just like people who "thought" interracial dating and same-sex marriages were taboo should get over themselves. Yeah, a slightly more extreme example, but the analogy still sticks: That the activity isn't hurting anyone so why do they care?

I think it's great the friends were all able to connect, even though a baby can sometimes change the dynamic of friendships. When I had a baby, most of my girlfriends were (and continue to be) single and/or childless. I met moms through mom groups, and while I made a few friends in the groups, by and large I found these folks painfully boring and not people I would have been friends with in the absence of kids. I'm glad I've been able to stay tight with my childless friends, and that often means going to bars, hipster restaurants, urban backyards and other random places that you may not want to bring your friends. Some times other folks have kids there, which is great. But life goes on if it's just mom, dad and son.

Also - someone suggested that it was horrible to leave an infant bored like that without stimulation in a bar. But what about all you suburbanites who spend 2 hours a day in the car while your infants just stare at the backseat? That's so unstimulating. It's okay if infants spend some time not being stimulated and with their own thoughts. I suspect this woman spends less time at wine bars than your kids spend blankly in the carseat.

Actually as a child development masters, I can tell you that a restaurant or bar at that time of night for a baby is way too much stimulation for a baby's brain. The natural rhythms of a baby should be winding down around 4 pm (think clean slate in the morning when a baby wakes - so the most stimulation then and wind down later in the evening).

Okay but then by your logic, babies should not do any stimulating activities after 4pm? No having the tv on in the background while dad watches the news at 6pm? No restaurants whatsoever, even at the kid-friendly hour of 5pm? No going to Target at 5pm, which has major stimulation involving generator noise and fluorescent lights (this was my son's biggest stimulation no-no up to age 6 months)? That may be the right answer, but I hardly think that all the PPs clutching pearls about a baby in a bar are equally worked up about those other activities.

Um, this is DCUM full of mothers up on the latest studies and EVERYONE will tell you that the TV should not even be on in the background for the first TWO YEARS of a child's life since the studies show how detrimental that is. Only a craptastic mom would admit to having a TV on around there baby until after the baby went to bed at the mandatory 7 pm bedtime (yes, slightly snarky, but kind of true)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In Europe, we saw babies in pubs and restaurants late at night all the time.

Europeans are lushes and not exactly good role models. They also smoke a lot and have unhealthy attitudes about things like sex. What's your point?

That must be why they are so much happier than Americans.

[Anonymous]

It is a bad mom move. That simple. I will ignore it since it doesn't bother me. Probably feel sorry for that baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In Europe, we saw babies in pubs and restaurants late at night all the time.

Europeans are lushes and not exactly good role models. They also smoke a lot and have unhealthy attitudes about things like sex. What's your point?

That must be why they are so much happier than Americans.

They most definitely are not happier than Americans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think American parents would be a lot happier if it was NBD to bring your kid to a bar. This whole idea that motherhood automatically excludes you from having a life is very unhealthy.

That is ridiculous. Parents go to bars - they just don't bring their kids along. It's o.k. to have a grown up night out AWAY from the kids. Period.

Evidently parents do bring their kids along. It's just that you think they shouldn't.

And they are obnoxious, self centered and inconsiderate people. No doubt.

Yes, the world is full of obnoxious, self-centered, and inconsiderate people. You will encounter them at any public place you go to. If you don't want to encounter them, stay out of public places.

So I guess it's fine for me to bring my boyfriend along to a girls only baby shower? 'Cause, ya know, there are rude people everywhere....

Wouldn't bother me. Why are there girls only baby showers? This is DC, not Mayberry.

So I guess it's fine for your husband to bring his mom into the delivery room. Or better, yet, his brother?

What kind of analogy are you going for? The logic fail kind? A shower and the delivery room are INVITED only events. No, your boyfriend and MIL should not crash these things. If they are INVITED, however, why not?

[Anonymous]

Poor parenting.

I always feel bad when I see a baby in a bar late night. It usually means they have no schedule for the kid and that same kid ends up being a nightmare as a toddler.

Structure is kind of important and if you are dragging a baby everywhere without routines, it is recipe for disaster later.

[Anonymous]

Everyone needs to stop commenting on this post and go get a drink themselves and just relaaaaaaaaaaax (with baby or not, I don't even care!). Baby will be fine, blog will continue to be full o' fire and it will soon be 5pm on Friday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone needs to stop commenting on this post and go get a drink themselves and just relaaaaaaaaaaax (with baby or not, I don't even care!). Baby will be fine, blog will continue to be full o' fire and it will soon be 5pm on Friday.

Exactly...the next time seeing a baby in a bar gets you all riled up...order another drink. Sheesh. Go braless, whatevs.

[Anonymous]

This doesn't bother me that much. And, I never brought any of my babies or children in a bar past a happy hour/ 7 pm.

We do have a couple friend that when we all go out (usually dinner around 8ish) bring their freaking baby EVERY time. It has gotten so annoying that when we all go out we do not invite anymore because no matter how many times we say adult only they think their buttercup is exempt.

We have tons of kid friendly social events and invites are usually clear on this - kid/no kid events.

[Anonymous]

Um so I'm assuming sitting with my 9 mo in my lap while we watch vintage sopranos and he eats lucky charms is a no no? OMG I BROKE THE BABY! Everybody panic!!