are there any black people on here..?

[Anonymous]

I'm not "black"... I am brown skinwise, and I am African American

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not "black"... I am brown skinwise, and I am African American

When I did genetic testing via National Geographic/ IBM years ago, it said my ancestors came from Africa. We are all African American, or African European, or African Asian...let's focus on our common humanity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow...you've proven the pp's point. Rather than take offense and *get defensive* why not embrace the idea, if it applies to you?

Turning this into a "well, why don't you do it too" thing is juvenile, creates hostility and gets us nowhere.

I am sorry but let me dissect your post for a moment.

What is your race? Please take the sentence I said I took offense to from the other pp and insert your race. You do not see how it would make someone upset? How is that comment appropriate? How is me stating that no race needs to be called out for being closed minded juvenile or creates hostility.

It seems like you are the hot headed one.

Please ANYONE on DCUM. Take the sentence "I wish __________ people were more open minded", insert your race and see how uncomfortable that makes you feel. And if you are fine with it please let me know.

Geez...you really and truly do not get it.
For the record...let us point out and acknowledge that ANY RACE, ANY PERSON can hold prejudice against any race or groups of people...even groups to which they belong
We all know (or should know this)
HOWEVER, in the context of the history of this country people of color have been systemically been discriminated against.
The societal pervasiveness of discrimination had and still has long-lasting affects that are still being played out today.
And guess what...the folks who have benefitted (THOUGH THEY MAY NOT HAVE ACTIVELY OR KNOWINGLY PARTICIPATED in the discrimination) have been Caucasian folk.
That doesn't mean all white folks are evil.
But in many ways they have historically benefitted a certain group of people.
What it means is that in this country there has been racism that folks often want to gloss over, and forget because slavery has been abolished and the voting rights act was passed.
There has to be a real conversation here...about what racism looks like...feels like...and how we can see RACE...understand and respect our differences..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Wow...you've proven the pp's point. Rather than take offense and *get defensive* why not embrace the idea, if it applies to you?

Turning this into a "well, why don't you do it too" thing is juvenile, creates hostility and gets us nowhere.

I am sorry but let me dissect your post for a moment.

What is your race? Please take the sentence I said I took offense to from the other pp and insert your race. You do not see how it would make someone upset? How is that comment appropriate? How is me stating that no race needs to be called out for being closed minded juvenile or creates hostility.

It seems like you are the hot headed one.

Please ANYONE on DCUM. Take the sentence "I wish __________ people were more open minded", insert your race and see how uncomfortable that makes you feel. And if you are fine with it please let me know.

Geez...you really and truly do not get it.
For the record...let us point out and acknowledge that ANY RACE, ANY PERSON can hold prejudice against any race or groups of people...even groups to which they belong
We all know (or should know this)
HOWEVER, in the context of the history of this country people of color have been systemically been discriminated against.
The societal pervasiveness of discrimination had and still has long-lasting affects that are still being played out today.
And guess what...the folks who have benefitted (THOUGH THEY MAY NOT HAVE ACTIVELY OR KNOWINGLY PARTICIPATED in the discrimination) have been Caucasian folk.
That doesn't mean all white folks are evil.
But in many ways they have historically benefitted a certain group of people.
What it means is that in this country there has been racism that folks often want to gloss over, and forget because slavery has been abolished and the voting rights act was passed.
There has to be a real conversation here...about what racism looks like...feels like...and how we can see RACE...understand and respect our differences..

Fine, let's talk history. All of us whites and blacks and browns should leave this country and restore the rights of the original Native American inhabitants. Either that, or we focus less on the past and more on the present and future. Anything else is blah blah blah.

[ManHere]

I was the OP of the "I'm an African American, Ask Me Anything" post. I though there was very civilized discussion there. That was over a year ago.

In recent months, I've seen a lot more race baiting and racially insensitive posts on DCUM. However, in my opinion, it's a very small percentage of the traffic and meant to cause a stir. Of course, as a black man, I'm more aware of these posts because the topics usually interest me.

I think that this topic, and many of the responses just give those FEW anonymous posters (of all races) valildation that they have succeeded in stirring the pot.

That's just my opinion of the matter

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]I wish white people would put down their defenses and listen more.[/b] And after listening and trying to understand the other perspective, try to convey that they've learned something.

Most comments are too subtle for some people to understand why they're problematic, like the comment above about the play group. People tend not to realize when they're making assumptions, about race or anything else. That's why they're assumptions. We need to be open to having our assumptions challenged. If you really want to live in a post-racist world, put down your defenses and engage in a real dialogue.

It's painful when someone accuses you of racism or racial cluelessness. It's like you're being told you're ugly in some fundamental way. I know, because I'm white and I've been there. It's often embarrassing, even shameful, and goes against the core of what you believe about yourself. But if you're white and you find yourself in that situation, turn into it and become more informed. Then you'll be more like the person you think you are.

Stepping down from the soapbox now. . .

These are the posts that anger me and I dont understand. I could say the same thing to you. I wish AA people would put down their defenses and listen more. Why are you generalizing an entire race. Its absurd!

I am not this PP but I am the PP that said that color does matter. Here is the thing, you could not say the same to minorities. And that is what you need to understand. Everything is not tit for tat.

If a black person (or other minority) is telling you what it is like to be black, what their experiences are, etc then it is not your place to tell them to stop being so sensitive, get the chip off of their shoulder, etc. You don't know what it is like. You will never walk that path so just be quiet and listen. No one is asking you to do anything except have some respect. You don't need to chime in about how we are all the same and they are just exaggerating. You have no idea, and for that you should be thankful.

So it does not work in reverse. No one is telling you about what it is like to be white and then discrediting any comments or thoughts that are based on your personal experiences. You have nothing to defend, no one is trying to stereotype or oppress you.

You don't have to worry about being seen as the representative for your entire race. If a white person acts foolish, it is seen as a white person acting foolish. There are many other images to balance that out. However, it doesn't really work that way in reverse. Appreciate that privilege and stop trying to discredit the experiences of those who know what they go through.

So maybe that is why a mommy would want a playgroup with other moms who understand that. It must get tiring trying to constantly explain and defend your worldview and experiences. It is nice to be around those who already get it- no words are necessary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]I wish white people would put down their defenses and listen more.[/b] And after listening and trying to understand the other perspective, try to convey that they've learned something.

Most comments are too subtle for some people to understand why they're problematic, like the comment above about the play group. People tend not to realize when they're making assumptions, about race or anything else. That's why they're assumptions. We need to be open to having our assumptions challenged. If you really want to live in a post-racist world, put down your defenses and engage in a real dialogue.

It's painful when someone accuses you of racism or racial cluelessness. It's like you're being told you're ugly in some fundamental way. I know, because I'm white and I've been there. It's often embarrassing, even shameful, and goes against the core of what you believe about yourself. But if you're white and you find yourself in that situation, turn into it and become more informed. Then you'll be more like the person you think you are.

Stepping down from the soapbox now. . .

These are the posts that anger me and I dont understand. I could say the same thing to you. I wish AA people would put down their defenses and listen more. Why are you generalizing an entire race. Its absurd!

I am not this PP but I am the PP that said that color does matter. Here is the thing, you could not say the same to minorities. And that is what you need to understand. Everything is not tit for tat.

If a black person (or other minority) is telling you what it is like to be black, what their experiences are, etc then it is not your place to tell them to stop being so sensitive, get the chip off of their shoulder, etc. You don't know what it is like. You will never walk that path so just be quiet and listen. No one is asking you to do anything except have some respect. You don't need to chime in about how we are all the same and they are just exaggerating. You have no idea, and for that you should be thankful.

So it does not work in reverse. No one is telling you about what it is like to be white and then discrediting any comments or thoughts that are based on your personal experiences. You have nothing to defend, no one is trying to stereotype or oppress you.

You don't have to worry about being seen as the representative for your entire race. If a white person acts foolish, it is seen as a white person acting foolish. There are many other images to balance that out. However, it doesn't really work that way in reverse. Appreciate that privilege and stop trying to discredit the experiences of those who know what they go through.

So maybe that is why a mommy would want a playgroup with other moms who understand that. It must get tiring trying to constantly explain and defend your worldview and experiences. It is nice to be around those who already get it- no words are necessary.

You do not need to tell me what to understand. From your post and that pps post I understand that apparently ALL white people do not listen. Am I right? Because between you and the few other posters who vehemently disagree with me….when did anyone state that it *some* white people who don’t listen. From what I have read it’s the entire white culture?

When did I ever post that I pretended to know what it is like to be AA? I do not and would not ever say that in my life. And if someone is explaining to me their feelings I would never interrupt or claim to know what they are or should be feeling. That is ME. Now another white, latino, or yes even an AA person might say they know or to tell the person to get the chip off their shoulder but I would not. Therefore you cannot generalize an entire race to say that “white” people don’t listen or want to know. That is what I think is absurd.

And is does work in reverse. What if I am explaining something about a stereotype for being a white catholic (I am not) and I say that all Asians need to stop their judgement and listen. It’s the same thing. Different history yes- but like another pp said we all have our history. That does not make one person better than the other.

Its not tit for tat. Its about how each person wants to be treated. With respect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]I wish white people would put down their defenses and listen more.[/b] And after listening and trying to understand the other perspective, try to convey that they've learned something.

Most comments are too subtle for some people to understand why they're problematic, like the comment above about the play group. People tend not to realize when they're making assumptions, about race or anything else. That's why they're assumptions. We need to be open to having our assumptions challenged. If you really want to live in a post-racist world, put down your defenses and engage in a real dialogue.

It's painful when someone accuses you of racism or racial cluelessness. It's like you're being told you're ugly in some fundamental way. I know, because I'm white and I've been there. It's often embarrassing, even shameful, and goes against the core of what you believe about yourself. But if you're white and you find yourself in that situation, turn into it and become more informed. Then you'll be more like the person you think you are.

Stepping down from the soapbox now. . .

These are the posts that anger me and I dont understand. I could say the same thing to you. I wish AA people would put down their defenses and listen more. Why are you generalizing an entire race. Its absurd!

I am not this PP but I am the PP that said that color does matter. Here is the thing, you could not say the same to minorities. And that is what you need to understand. Everything is not tit for tat.

If a black person (or other minority) is telling you what it is like to be black, what their experiences are, etc then it is not your place to tell them to stop being so sensitive, get the chip off of their shoulder, etc. You don't know what it is like. You will never walk that path so just be quiet and listen. No one is asking you to do anything except have some respect. You don't need to chime in about how we are all the same and they are just exaggerating. You have no idea, and for that you should be thankful.

So it does not work in reverse. No one is telling you about what it is like to be white and then discrediting any comments or thoughts that are based on your personal experiences. You have nothing to defend, no one is trying to stereotype or oppress you.

You don't have to worry about being seen as the representative for your entire race. If a white person acts foolish, it is seen as a white person acting foolish. There are many other images to balance that out. However, it doesn't really work that way in reverse. Appreciate that privilege and stop trying to discredit the experiences of those who know what they go through.

So maybe that is why a mommy would want a playgroup with other moms who understand that. It must get tiring trying to constantly explain and defend your worldview and experiences. It is nice to be around those who already get it- no words are necessary.

You do not need to tell me what to understand. From your post and that pps post I understand that apparently ALL white people do not listen. Am I right? Because between you and the few other posters who vehemently disagree with me….when did anyone state that it *some* white people who don’t listen. From what I have read it’s the entire white culture?

When did I ever post that I pretended to know what it is like to be AA? I do not and would not ever say that in my life. And if someone is explaining to me their feelings I would never interrupt or claim to know what they are or should be feeling. That is ME. Now another white, latino, or yes even an AA person might say they know or to tell the person to get the chip off their shoulder but I would not. Therefore you cannot generalize an entire race to say that “white” people don’t listen or want to know. That is what I think is absurd.

And is does work in reverse. What if I am explaining something about a stereotype for being a white catholic (I am not) and I say that all Asians need to stop their judgement and listen. It’s the same thing. Different history yes- but like another pp said we all have our history. That does not make one person better than the other.

Its not tit for tat. Its about how each person wants to be treated. With respect.

Give me a break. We are speaking in general, stop being so dense and looking for something to argue about you have missed the entire point because IN MY OPINION based on your response you don't want to listen and reflect.

IN GENERAL that is what priveleged people tend to do. IN GENERAL they compare situations that are not comprable. Then IN GENERAL if one is thinking of a response then there isn't really time to reflect, IN MY OPINION.

I PERSONALLY see why SOME minorities would become irritated at these conversations and choose not to have them. Because from what I PERSONALLY have observed, there is no point. You will LIKELY be accused of being too sensitive while at the same time not sensitive enough to all the struggles of white Americans, IN MY OPINION.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not "black"... I am brown skinwise, and I am African American

LOL. You sound like my kid.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]I wish white people would put down their defenses and listen more.[/b] And after listening and trying to understand the other perspective, try to convey that they've learned something.

Most comments are too subtle for some people to understand why they're problematic, like the comment above about the play group. People tend not to realize when they're making assumptions, about race or anything else. That's why they're assumptions. We need to be open to having our assumptions challenged. If you really want to live in a post-racist world, put down your defenses and engage in a real dialogue.

It's painful when someone accuses you of racism or racial cluelessness. It's like you're being told you're ugly in some fundamental way. I know, because I'm white and I've been there. It's often embarrassing, even shameful, and goes against the core of what you believe about yourself. But if you're white and you find yourself in that situation, turn into it and become more informed. Then you'll be more like the person you think you are.

Stepping down from the soapbox now. . .

These are the posts that anger me and I dont understand. I could say the same thing to you. I wish AA people would put down their defenses and listen more. Why are you generalizing an entire race. Its absurd!

I am not this PP but I am the PP that said that color does matter. Here is the thing, you could not say the same to minorities. And that is what you need to understand. Everything is not tit for tat.

If a black person (or other minority) is telling you what it is like to be black, what their experiences are, etc then it is not your place to tell them to stop being so sensitive, get the chip off of their shoulder, etc. You don't know what it is like. You will never walk that path so just be quiet and listen. No one is asking you to do anything except have some respect. You don't need to chime in about how we are all the same and they are just exaggerating. You have no idea, and for that you should be thankful.

So it does not work in reverse. No one is telling you about what it is like to be white and then discrediting any comments or thoughts that are based on your personal experiences. You have nothing to defend, no one is trying to stereotype or oppress you.

You don't have to worry about being seen as the representative for your entire race. If a white person acts foolish, it is seen as a white person acting foolish. There are many other images to balance that out. However, it doesn't really work that way in reverse. Appreciate that privilege and stop trying to discredit the experiences of those who know what they go through.

So maybe that is why a mommy would want a playgroup with other moms who understand that. It must get tiring trying to constantly explain and defend your worldview and experiences. It is nice to be around those who already get it- no words are necessary.

You do not need to tell me what to understand. From your post and that pps post I understand that apparently ALL white people do not listen. Am I right? Because between you and the few other posters who vehemently disagree with me….when did anyone state that it *some* white people who don’t listen. From what I have read it’s the entire white culture?

When did I ever post that I pretended to know what it is like to be AA? I do not and would not ever say that in my life. And if someone is explaining to me their feelings I would never interrupt or claim to know what they are or should be feeling. That is ME. Now another white, latino, or yes even an AA person might say they know or to tell the person to get the chip off their shoulder but I would not. Therefore you cannot generalize an entire race to say that “white” people don’t listen or want to know. That is what I think is absurd.

And is does work in reverse. What if I am explaining something about a stereotype for being a white catholic (I am not) and I say that all Asians need to stop their judgement and listen. It’s the same thing. Different history yes- but like another pp said we all have our history. That does not make one person better than the other.

Its not tit for tat. Its about how each person wants to be treated. With respect.

Give me a break. We are speaking in general, stop being so dense and looking for something to argue about you have missed the entire point because IN MY OPINION based on your response you don't want to listen and reflect.

IN GENERAL that is what priveleged people tend to do. IN GENERAL they compare situations that are not comprable. Then IN GENERAL if one is thinking of a response then there isn't really time to reflect, IN MY OPINION.

I PERSONALLY see why SOME minorities would become irritated at these conversations and choose not to have them. Because from what I PERSONALLY have observed, there is no point. You will LIKELY be accused of being too sensitive while at the same time not sensitive enough to all the struggles of white Americans, IN MY OPINION.

Rather than getting angry why don’t you explain what point I missed then, especially since I am missing the entire point?

You are now stereotyping me based on your own bias and off my posts! From some posts you believe I am privileged, not reflective, too sensitive, what else? Where did I assume anything about you?

I have not said anything ride or made accusations of any poster. That is what I find strange. I am reflecting based on my initial reaction to the OP and then the other pp’s response about white people listening. Where did I say some thing racist, defamatory, hostile, etc?

I do not understand what point I am missing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous[b wrote:]I wish white people would put down their defenses and listen more.[/b] And after listening and trying to understand the other perspective, try to convey that they've learned something.

Most comments are too subtle for some people to understand why they're problematic, like the comment above about the play group. People tend not to realize when they're making assumptions, about race or anything else. That's why they're assumptions. We need to be open to having our assumptions challenged. If you really want to live in a post-racist world, put down your defenses and engage in a real dialogue.

It's painful when someone accuses you of racism or racial cluelessness. It's like you're being told you're ugly in some fundamental way. I know, because I'm white and I've been there. It's often embarrassing, even shameful, and goes against the core of what you believe about yourself. But if you're white and you find yourself in that situation, turn into it and become more informed. Then you'll be more like the person you think you are.

Stepping down from the soapbox now. . .

These are the posts that anger me and I dont understand. I could say the same thing to you. I wish AA people would put down their defenses and listen more. Why are you generalizing an entire race. Its absurd!

I am not this PP but I am the PP that said that color does matter. Here is the thing, you could not say the same to minorities. And that is what you need to understand. Everything is not tit for tat.

If a black person (or other minority) is telling you what it is like to be black, what their experiences are, etc then it is not your place to tell them to stop being so sensitive, get the chip off of their shoulder, etc. You don't know what it is like. You will never walk that path so just be quiet and listen. No one is asking you to do anything except have some respect. You don't need to chime in about how we are all the same and they are just exaggerating. You have no idea, and for that you should be thankful.

So it does not work in reverse. No one is telling you about what it is like to be white and then discrediting any comments or thoughts that are based on your personal experiences. You have nothing to defend, no one is trying to stereotype or oppress you.

You don't have to worry about being seen as the representative for your entire race. If a white person acts foolish, it is seen as a white person acting foolish. There are many other images to balance that out. However, it doesn't really work that way in reverse. Appreciate that privilege and stop trying to discredit the experiences of those who know what they go through.

So maybe that is why a mommy would want a playgroup with other moms who understand that. It must get tiring trying to constantly explain and defend your worldview and experiences. It is nice to be around those who already get it- no words are necessary.

That's not how empathy works. Every person has a valid point of view, a valid set of experiences and beliefs. We are all "biased" one way or another - that's why we need to ask, and to listen. It makes little sense to argue that some people don't get the right to be listened to because their race happens to be _____ A conversation requires two willing partners - otherwise it's just a sermon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not "black"... I am brown skinwise, and I am African American

LOL. You sound like my kid.

Hey it's true. WTF is black... no one is actually that dark black... just like a white person isn't actually the color white...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm not "black"... I am brown skinwise, and I am African American

When I did genetic testing via National Geographic/ IBM years ago, it said my ancestors came from Africa. We are all African American, or African European, or African Asian...let's focus on our common humanity.

That's all well and good... I'm just referring to using a color to describe a race or ethnicity.... No one is actually "black" in color. I hate that. Just like no one is actually white in color... that's stupid.

[Anonymous]

WTF was the point of this thread? Very pointless and one weird white lady keeps clogging things up with her cluelessness.

[Anonymous]

ManHere wrote:I was the OP of the "I'm an African American, Ask Me Anything" post. I though there was very civilized discussion there. That was over a year ago.

In recent months, I've seen a lot more race baiting and racially insensitive posts on DCUM. However, in my opinion, it's a very small percentage of the traffic and meant to cause a stir. Of course, as a black man, I'm more aware of these posts because the topics usually interest me.

I think that this topic, and many of the responses just give those FEW anonymous posters (of all races) valildation that they have succeeded in stirring the pot.

That's just my opinion of the matter

you're sexy