Pouts and Denial- What is Wrong With My Wife?

[Anonymous]

No, Op, don't enable this behavior and talk to her about it straight.

Tell her if she doesn't like it then may be a trial separation is better. she needs to tell you the issues and can't expect you to mind read.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do her a favor and move out.

Maybe she needs to move out.

[Anonymous]

Op, dump her if this continues after a hard conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You need to say “hey, can we talk? I feel like you might be unhappy with me and I would like to see if there’s anything I can do. I care about you.”

Why you didn’t do this is beyond my comprehension.

Because it's an apology for a 'crime' he doesn't know he committed.

I think this is it exactly. If he admits that he knows she’s mad because he killed her favorite cat or whatever, then he is admitting to a “crime.”

As long as he keeps up the facade that he has no idea why she’s mad (of course I didn’t kill the cat on purpose, I didn’t know you wanted dinner, etc), then he gets to pretend the she’s crazy and he did nothing wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do her a favor and move out.

Maybe she needs to move out.

I don’t think the kids would fare well with her gone.

[Anonymous]

I would say that you guys either need therapy or some kind of separation for her to learn how to communicate. what she is doing is emotional abuse and Op should not taking it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do her a favor and move out.

Maybe she needs to move out.

I don’t think the kids would fare well with her gone.

Did OP write this?
Is this a joke?

[Anonymous]

Did she ever tell you what was wrong?

[Anonymous]

PERIMENOPAUSE. It wreaks havoc with a woman's hormones and emotional balance.
Be supportive, Have a loving conversation with her and say dear you need to see your OB/GYN and there is help for your erratic emotions.

[Anonymous]

It is her responsibility to manage her emotions and communicate with her DH otherwise it will fall apart and eventually OP will dump her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get home from work. Wife is immediately an intentional a$$hole about a half dozen things. I ask what the problem is, I get told "nothing" four times, so I leave it be.

Aggressive, unpleasant, huffy-puffy pout continues. I ignore it. Not taking the bait or rewarding her antisocial behavior. She's now polluting the whole house. I decamp to the basement and post on the internet/watch TV.

At 7:30, I'm called a jerk for not reheating two portions of leftovers. She never asked for a portion.

This is new. We've been together for 17 years.

Humor me with your guesses

You're lazy and don't do jack shit at home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It is her responsibility to manage her emotions and communicate with her DH otherwise it will fall apart and eventually OP will dump her.

Oh no! How will she even live without a man getting drunk and looking at porn in her basement?

He’s like a bizarro world version of a Victorian ghost.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is her responsibility to manage her emotions and communicate with her DH otherwise it will fall apart and eventually OP will dump her.

Oh no! How will she even live without a man getting drunk and looking at porn in her basement?

He’s like a bizarro world version of a Victorian ghost.

then don't and get a divorce and stop doing emotional abuse of silent treatment, pouting and all that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I get home from work. Wife is immediately an intentional a$$hole about a half dozen things. I ask what the problem is, I get told "nothing" four times, so I leave it be.

Aggressive, unpleasant, huffy-puffy pout continues. I ignore it. Not taking the bait or rewarding her antisocial behavior. She's now polluting the whole house. I decamp to the basement and post on the internet/watch TV.

At 7:30, I'm called a jerk for not reheating two portions of leftovers. She never asked for a portion.

This is new. We've been together for 17 years.

Humor me with your guesses

Sounds like you can’t stand her, and don’t see yourself in a partnership.

Why would someone in a couple not prepare dinner for both parties (unless otherwise directed )?

Do you have kids? If so, you should have interacted with them, not gone online.

I suggest marriage counseling or divorce, depending upon whether you are willing to make any effort for a possible future together.

[Anonymous]

Read Gottman’s 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work.
Implement any takeaways that you can on your own. With a shift in how you communicate, you might see a shift in how she responds.
Then work through the book together or go see a marriage counselor. Life’s too short to live like this.
Yeah, you could divorce—but wherever you go, there you are. You’ll bring your way of responding and handling conflict with you to any new relationship eventually. Might as well try to make this one better!
Good luck. We were there and turned it around.