What happened to young men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I have seen so many gorgeous women become so desperate in the DC for love and companionship that they will drop their standards and date sloppy dorks.

Too bad for these broads. Perhaps they should, gasp, reach out to guys they are interested in and, double gasp, actually ask them out! Women ruined IRL dating and now they're angry that people are suggesting they have to do more than the traditional sit on their hands and have the men do all the work. Life is unfair!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Me Too has scared the S out of them.

Scott Galloway talks about issues facing young men and his related research, interesting to listen to.

Oh lawd. Scott Galloway is like Andrew Tate in a slightly more palatable form. Please stop following these idiot bros.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You mean the young women weren't harassed like when you were young?

The horror! They can actually attend parties, eat, drink and chat like actual human beings, without being followed, surrounded, or need to watch their drink the entire time.

Instead, if they're interested in a young man their age, they can go up to him and start a conversation, peer-to-peer.

How sad for them, OP.

But the issue is they don't go up to guys. And guys don't go up to them out of fear, ever though woman naturally expect them the male to approach.

We can worry about that later. For now, less harassment is a win.

Sure. But absolutely no young man is going to know whether their approach to a young woman is going to be deemed flirting or harassment. And social media makes the consequences of misjudging and a shoot down enormous. These boys grew up while men like Al Franken were absolutely destroyed for... No one knows why Al Franken was destroyed. But it had to do with a mild joke relating to a woman. He got wrecked for it. A smart guy, a US Senator, trying to do the right thing, and he got destroyed for a very mid and harmless joke from a long time ago.

So these boys grew up with that and MeToo. And they learned that talking to women is incredibly dangerous. You can destroy your entire life with a bad joke or a woman rejecting him and posting on social media about it. Off the top of my head, I'm thinking about an awkward date Aziz Ansari had. That date posted all about it online and it nearly destroyed this man's career.

The lesson these young men have learned is that flirting is dangerous business today. Combine that with the covid isolation, which definitely affected social skills, and the damn phones, and it's not a great time for a young man to take a risk and talk to a woman today.

It's sad and pathetic. But the lameness of young men today is not entirely irrational. And they have their porn. So a lot of them are checked out and don't even try.

Could we stop with the tired trope that modern life makes it dangerous for men to speak to women? Me too was not about men talking to women, it was about men touching women without consent and using their positions of employment to socially coerce women into unwanted sexual relationships.

And Al Franken wasn’t “destroyed for a very a mild and harmless joke from a long time ago”, he had 6+ accusations of groping against him, including one picture that became publicly circulated in which he was either pretending or actually touching a sleeping female colleague. He publicly acknowledged she had not consented to the touching or photo and said,” I am ashamed of that photo," Franken told Minnesota Public Radio. "She didn’t have any ability to consent. She had every right to feel violated by that photo. I have apologized to her. I was very grateful that she accepted my apology. That is all I can say. My intent doesn’t matter. What matters is that she felt the way she felt from this photo and for that I am ashamed.”

https://abcnews.go.com/Politics/sen-franken-embarassed-groping-claims-rebuild-trust/story?id=51394106
https://www.nytimes.com/2017/12/07/us/politics/al-franken-senate-sexual-harassment.html

Frankenstein chose to resign from his position in order to avoid a Senate Ethics Investigation, not because he was forced to resign.

It really doesn’t help today’s male youth to minimize the ways in which men have freely violated women for centuries. It’s not actually that hard not to touch a woman without her permission, and not to treat her cruelly or unequally. It’s just that men don’t want to give up these privileges.

It’s not helpful to re-write and minimize the past.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was at a mixed ages party with a lot of young adults but the guys weren’t going to the women and mingling with them.
Is the culture changed so much young guys are afraid of talking to young women in real life.
I am asking as a middle aged guy.

I have seen so many gorgeous women become so desperate in the DC for love and companionship that they will drop their standards and date sloppy dorks.

lol, no

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Me Too has scared the S out of them.

Scott Galloway talks about issues facing young men and his related research, interesting to listen to.

Oh lawd. Scott Galloway is like Andrew Tate in a slightly more palatable form. Please stop following these idiot bros.

There are so many young men who are losers these days. Why would any women to date these guys? I have two sons, ages 26 and 24, who have many options in today’s dating market. The older one is a former Division I athlete and now works at Amazon as a senior software engineer, earning $350K a year. The younger one is also a former Division I athlete and is currently in medical school. They were raised by a tiger mom who, from the age of four through eighteen, emphasized academics, music, and sports. Beyond athletics, both of my sons can play multiple musical instruments. When they were sixteen, I asked them a simple question: What do you bring to the table that would make a woman want to be your girlfriend?

Too many young men today feel entitled to relationships without putting in the effort to become the best versions of themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Me Too has scared the S out of them.

Scott Galloway talks about issues facing young men and his related research, interesting to listen to.

Oh lawd. Scott Galloway is like Andrew Tate in a slightly more palatable form. Please stop following these idiot bros.

There are so many young men who are losers these days. Why would any women to date these guys? I have two sons, ages 26 and 24, who have many options in today’s dating market. The older one is a former Division I athlete and now works at Amazon as a senior software engineer, earning $350K a year. The younger one is also a former Division I athlete and is currently in medical school. They were raised by a tiger mom who, from the age of four through eighteen, emphasized academics, music, and sports. Beyond athletics, both of my sons can play multiple musical instruments. When they were sixteen, I asked them a simple question: What do you bring to the table that would make a woman want to be your girlfriend?

Too many young men today feel entitled to relationships without putting in the effort to become the best versions of themselves.

The bolded is something women internalize from a young age -- that they need to have something to offer in order to attract not only a partner but friends -- and many men don't, for some reason. And it's also why women tend to be happier as singletons than men are. Women are more likely to have built a worthwhile and interesting life worth living even without a man, and many men aimlessly meander through their 20s without purpose or effort and then expect a woman to come fix everything up in their 30s. But they offer nothing to these women. Many of these guys don't even offer the promise of marriage or kids, as they expect to drag their feet on those for years with no regard for women's biological clocks or desires.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What were they doing just hanging out by themselves?

A lot of single people talking with their own circle of buddies.

That’s how many people in this age group socialize. They aren’t mingling at parties if they have people they know and are hanging out with. I have kids in this age group and this is just my anecdotal experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What were they doing just hanging out by themselves?

A lot of single people talking with their own circle of buddies.

That’s how many people in this age group socialize. They aren’t mingling at parties if they have people they know and are hanging out with. I have kids in this age group and this is just my anecdotal experience.

Yes,
But young men in the past used this kind of opportunities to meet new potential romantic partners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Me Too has scared the S out of them.

Scott Galloway talks about issues facing young men and his related research, interesting to listen to.

Oh lawd. Scott Galloway is like Andrew Tate in a slightly more palatable form. Please stop following these idiot bros.

There are so many young men who are losers these days. Why would any women to date these guys? I have two sons, ages 26 and 24, who have many options in today’s dating market. The older one is a former Division I athlete and now works at Amazon as a senior software engineer, earning $350K a year. The younger one is also a former Division I athlete and is currently in medical school. They were raised by a tiger mom who, from the age of four through eighteen, emphasized academics, music, and sports. Beyond athletics, both of my sons can play multiple musical instruments. When they were sixteen, I asked them a simple question: What do you bring to the table that would make a woman want to be your girlfriend?

Too many young men today feel entitled to relationships without putting in the effort to become the best versions of themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What were they doing just hanging out by themselves?

A lot of single people talking with their own circle of buddies.

That’s how many people in this age group socialize. They aren’t mingling at parties if they have people they know and are hanging out with. I have kids in this age group and this is just my anecdotal experience.

Yes,
But young men in the past used this kind of opportunities to meet new potential romantic partners.

And then they wasted time talking to unsuitable people for an hour before realizing oh he’s an Andrew Tate bro. Now they can look at tinder, see he calls women “females” in his profile or has a photo with a large fish, and just avoid. I assume the same is true for men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

There are so many young men who are losers these days. Why would any women to date these guys? I have two sons, ages 26 and 24, who have many options in today’s dating market. The older one is a former Division I athlete and now works at Amazon as a senior software engineer, earning $350K a year. The younger one is also a former Division I athlete and is currently in medical school. They were raised by a tiger mom who, from the age of four through eighteen, emphasized academics, music, and sports. Beyond athletics, both of my sons can play multiple musical instruments. When they were sixteen, I asked them a simple question: What do you bring to the table that would make a woman want to be your girlfriend?

Too many young men today feel entitled to relationships without putting in the effort to become the best versions of themselves.

This is a joke, but the answer to your question is: having a penis and putting up with her bullshit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Me Too has scared the S out of them.

Scott Galloway talks about issues facing young men and his related research, interesting to listen to.

Oh lawd. Scott Galloway is like Andrew Tate in a slightly more palatable form. Please stop following these idiot bros.

There are so many young men who are losers these days. Why would any women to date these guys? I have two sons, ages 26 and 24, who have many options in today’s dating market. The older one is a former Division I athlete and now works at Amazon as a senior software engineer, earning $350K a year. The younger one is also a former Division I athlete and is currently in medical school. They were raised by a tiger mom who, from the age of four through eighteen, emphasized academics, music, and sports. Beyond athletics, both of my sons can play multiple musical instruments. When they were sixteen, I asked them a simple question: What do you bring to the table that would make a woman want to be your girlfriend?

Too many young men today feel entitled to relationships without putting in the effort to become the best versions of themselves.

Not a tiger mom, but raised a son who in HS and college has had serious long term girlfriends (sequentially). He is going into a stable blue collar job, so he's never going to earn $350K a year, but he is very hard-working, so that doesn't seem to be a barrier to finding girlfriends. It's clear to me that he wants to be a good, present and collaborative father. I wasn't a tiger mom, but his sister and I have continuously educated him on principles of consent and how to respect and support women and to recognize what an abusive relationship (emotional or physical) looks like versus a healthy one. From my perspective, I have seen him do things that I would categorize as "good guy" or "good boyfriend" things. (Although I recognize my bias.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Me Too has scared the S out of them.

Scott Galloway talks about issues facing young men and his related research, interesting to listen to.

Oh lawd. Scott Galloway is like Andrew Tate in a slightly more palatable form. Please stop following these idiot bros.

Scott Galloway references legitimate research and calls you men out for their short comings and lack of social skills. I don't think he and Andrew Tate have anything in common.

[Anonymous]

Nothing wonderful will happen to you if you're not willing to face difficulties and repeated rejections. Women are typically attracted to men who have the following qualities: 1) the ability to secure future resources, 2) intelligence, and 3) kindness. Being tall and handsome is a bonus, but it’s not a requirement.

Six months ago, my 23-year-old daughter and I went to a Vietnamese restaurant, where we saw a homeless man standing outside. As we entered the restaurant, a young man was about to leave, but we didn’t pay much attention to him. After we sat down and were ready to order, that same young man returned with the homeless man. He asked him what he would like to eat and told the restaurant owner that he would pay for it. Not only that, he also gave the homeless man a $100 bill (he later told us that he usually carries a $100 bill in case of an emergency).
My daughter was so moved by this that she approached the young man and asked if he was interested in going on a date. To her surprise, he said yes.

They have been seeing each other for the past five months, and she has discovered that he possesses all three of those qualities. He is in medical school (secure future resources), he plays several musical instruments (intelligence), and he is kind to people without expecting anything in return (kindness), as demonstrated by his interaction with the homeless man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wonderful will happen to you if you're not willing to face difficulties and repeated rejections. Women are typically attracted to men who have the following qualities: 1) the ability to secure future resources, 2) intelligence, and 3) kindness. Being tall and handsome is a bonus, but it’s not a requirement.

Six months ago, my 23-year-old daughter and I went to a Vietnamese restaurant, where we saw a homeless man standing outside. As we entered the restaurant, a young man was about to leave, but we didn’t pay much attention to him. After we sat down and were ready to order, that same young man returned with the homeless man. He asked him what he would like to eat and told the restaurant owner that he would pay for it. Not only that, he also gave the homeless man a $100 bill (he later told us that he usually carries a $100 bill in case of an emergency).
My daughter was so moved by this that she approached the young man and asked if he was interested in going on a date. To her surprise, he said yes.

They have been seeing each other for the past five months, and she has discovered that he possesses all three of those qualities. He is in medical school (secure future resources), he plays several musical instruments (intelligence), and he is kind to people without expecting anything in return (kindness), as demonstrated by his interaction with the homeless man.

Sweet story.