38F - OLD apps: not getting any matches

[Anonymous]

Also remove any selfies and bathroom mirror pics. Those are my instant swipe lefts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But OP is not attracted to short men. OP, keep your standards. I agree with removing the picture with your niece. Do NOT increase the age, you don't want kids with someone who is almost 60.

They're not standards, they're preferences. Calling a height preference a standard makes it seem like people are encouraging her to give a dishonest person a chance.

I get it. However, OP is attracted to taller than average guys. She cannot force herself to be intimate with someone who is not attractive to her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Also remove any selfies and bathroom mirror pics. Those are my instant swipe lefts.

Depends on what a guy's looking for. If you're DTF, the bathroom mirror pics communicate that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ditch photo with niece
Set age filter to 55
Reduce height requirement

Uh, no. You are better off single forever than taking on a man 17 years older than you. If you really want to have kids, having them as a true single mom is way better than having little kids plus an elderly husband to care for.

OP, it's natural that you feel your biological clock ticking, but remember that no husband is sooooooo much better than a bad husband.

55 is not elderly FFS he has a good 20-25 years run ahead of him.

It is too old to start a family. Actually, the father's age is related to some weird cancers and developmental delays, including autism. Add working until 80 to support 2 kids in college, inheritance drama with the older sets of kids etc. Most men in their 60s are too tired to raise small kids, play sports.

[Anonymous]

If you’re open to a single dad that doesn’t want more bio kids, remove the “wants kids” filter.

I agree w above poster that a 38 divorced female wanting bio kids (with none of her own currently) will have very little luck on apps. If this is an absolute must for you, you would have better luck with a reputable matchmaking service or a more niche dating app. Also, if you are open to adoption or surrogacy, consider making that known.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How did you set your filters

What do your photos look like

What does your profile say

My filters are:

Must have undergrad and/or graduate degree
Height: 5’9 - 6’4
Open to children
Distance: 30 miles

I have recent photos from my trip in Europe; full body shots of me sight seeing; a picture of me with my niece; picture of me in a dress on the beach

Unfortunately your education requirement is limiting. Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good criterion to have, but it’s a well-known phenomenon that women are now better educated than men.

“Open to children” might tell a guy you want them. That is going to narrow your pool more.

+1. Especially because you are 38. They'd think you want children yesterday. They don't want the pressure to hurry, so they will date younger if they want children.

[Anonymous]

OP you are still married. Men wanting children will not match with you.
When will the divorce be final?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you are still married. Men wanting children will not match with you.
When will the divorce be final?

Ahhh, good catch. Quality people looking for marriage want someone who is truly available, legally and emotionally.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But OP is not attracted to short men. OP, keep your standards. I agree with removing the picture with your niece. Do NOT increase the age, you don't want kids with someone who is almost 60.

They're not standards, they're preferences. Calling a height preference a standard makes it seem like people are encouraging her to give a dishonest person a chance.

I get it. However, OP is attracted to taller than average guys. She cannot force herself to be intimate with someone who is not attractive to her.

DP.

That's absolute BS. That's like a 5'8 woman who is only attracted to 6'5" guys and taller. It's immature abd ridiculous

A 5'6" guy is tall enough to get the height difference that gives vain women like her ( and me) butterflies. She is too picky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're short and fat. And you won't date short men. And the tall men can do waaaaay better. I can't believe you didn't figure this out on your own.

OP is slim. The rest is true.

38F on a 5 feet frame would not look slim usually.

OMG. She's a 38 year old female! She said she weighed 118lbs.

Hang your head in shame and learn to read internet terms.

That’s hilarious that some dude thought this was her bra size.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're short and fat. And you won't date short men. And the tall men can do waaaaay better. I can't believe you didn't figure this out on your own.

OP is slim. The rest is true.

38F on a 5 feet frame would not look slim usually.

OMG. She's a 38 year old female! She said she weighed 118lbs.

Hang your head in shame and learn to read internet terms.

That’s hilarious that some dude thought this was her bra size.

Also, 38F bra size at 118lbs is gonna get dates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:118 pounds at 5'0 is a normal BMI for a woman.

It’s not thin though. For reference I am 5’8” and 124. BMI 18. That is slim. She is a full 8 inches shorter and only 6 pounds lighter. She may still be plenty attractive but slim she is not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:118 pounds at 5'0 is a normal BMI for a woman.

It’s not thin though. For reference I am 5’8” and 124. BMI 18. That is slim. She is a full 8 inches shorter and only 6 pounds lighter. She may still be plenty attractive but slim she is not.

She's carrying 20 lbs in 38F, tho.

[Anonymous]

I'm a bit shocked at the lack of interest in OP as well. Maybe it's just hinge? I'm 35 and was very briefly on tinder and bumble and was basically beating men off with a stick. I do think removing the picture with the child is good, but no need to drastically increase your age range (I'm guessing it's all the gross old men on here encouraging that so they think they have a change with 30's women). Also fine to drop the height filter - you can always decline them if you dont like their profile AND theyre short.

Also your weight is fine. Men have no clue about womens weight and just think anything over 100 is fat. So just ignore their comments, theyre used to anime children and have no idea what real women look like.

[Anonymous]

I think the problem today is that the apps aren't particularly useful anymore for meeting a potential life partner. They are all owned by the same company. And their priorities are not yours.

I'm sure OP is very fine. But at 38, it's going to be difficult to meet a good rando on a dating app that wants to start a family. The good ones at that age point are already married and have young kids. You can go younger for the entertainment. Or you can can go older for the divorced guys, who generally do not want to start new families.

I think these days its better to put yourself out there in the real world and hope for a little serendipity.