Any "older" parents ever consider "starting over" & trying for one more baby?

[Anonymous]

Doing it right now. Currently have 4 kids 7/9/11/16.
DW has a bun in the oven.

I'm 44, she's 43. It's gonna be a wild ride, but we'll manage. Sleep deprivation is gonna be a B.

[Anonymous]

I don’t know anyone who had a baby in their 20s so having another baby at 37 seems totally normal to me.

[Anonymous]

Keep in mind that ages 7 and 10 are pretty easy ages for a lot of kids, so while you know what it's like having a baby, you haven't parented teenagers. Teenagers can be very demanding of your time and need a lot, and it might be a lot harder to have the time for your 15 year old if you're busy potty training or something.

[Anonymous]

My reaction to this: Grow up already. To everything there is a season

[Anonymous]

If you DH is on board, go for it! We are an age gap family (between 1&2) and doing it again with #3! I’ll be 43 when #3 is born. I keep forgetting that I’m considered old bc I don’t feel old at all.

[Anonymous]

No need to turn everyone's life upside down. Focus on yourself, marriage, children, career, home, parents and friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t know anyone who had a baby in their 20s so having another baby at 37 seems totally normal to me.

That's a bit sad.

[Anonymous]

I had my oldest kid at 30 and my youngest kid a few months after turning 38. Don't underestimate how much more exhausting the pregnancy might be. DS is almost 3 now and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel more than I did during my older kids' toddler years because I've been through it before, but, man, the pregnancy and first year were brutal.

[Anonymous]

My kids are teens and I think wistfully of their younger years. But not the baby stage. Dear lord 0-24 months is so much work. Seeing my niece and nephew is enough to remind me that I don’t actually want to go back there again

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had my oldest kid at 30 and my youngest kid a few months after turning 38. Don't underestimate how much more exhausting the pregnancy might be. DS is almost 3 now and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel more than I did during my older kids' toddler years because I've been through it before, but, man, the pregnancy and first year were brutal.

I had my first at 30 and my third at 38. I had my first two close together so I felt much more tired at age 33 with a 2 year old and a baby than when I had a third child at 38 when my kids were 5 and 7. I also was a working mom with the first two. My maternity leave was exhausting and going back to work felt like a vacation.

With my third, I had 2 kids in school and I stopped working so it felt very manageable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are lots of posts by parents who love the large age gap but has anyone been part of the older kids whose parents had another kid much later? From the kid perspective were you close with your youngest sibling or not until adulthood.

Most people I know who were the kids in this scenario did not appreciate the change in family nearly as much as their parents proclaimed they did. They also didn’t have much of a relationship until they were all adults due to being at such different stages of life. Some resented being expected to babysit.

I was an older kid in a large age gap family and I LOVED having a baby sister. We were a super active family and she didn’t change the dynamic that much because she would just come along for all our activities. She was a very chill kid so this might not have worked with a different personality type. We are still very close as adults and I love having a cool twenty-something to teach me about Gen Z.

[Anonymous]

I considered it at 40, but I had a girl and a boy. DH and I were in a terrible place in our marriage and I was debating even staying with him. Add to that, I had to ask myself if we had a child with a severe disability would I be ok with that. I pondered it all for three more years and ultimately decided against it. Part of me does wish I’d tried, but at the time it was the best decision for me and my existing kids.

[Anonymous]

No one ever regrets having more children.

[Anonymous]

I don’t see what is the big problem. If you have the money and bandwidth for a third go for it. You know what it is like. Having 3 is a lot more than having 2, but you don’t need to be a genius to know this. Keep in mind that you will need help because your older two are supposedly in a lot of activities and it might not be ideal to bring a toddler to all of them (baby is easier).

I have 3 (12, 10 and 6.5). The 3.5 year difference between my second a third still feel like a lot. My third is healthy (so far), but the only boy and he definitely creates more fights and problem than my older girls. Things were easy when he was a baby and during Covid because we had no activities (the kids were all also younger).

Anyway, I am sure you know all of this. I had my last at 34, but I don’t think 37-38 is too old.

[Anonymous]

I had my second at 37, and it’s definitely not too old. My neighbor had her third at age 48, and even that’s not too old, watching her. Running after babies keeps you young.