DH demanding sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can help him find an AP.

Or you can find a man who only enjoys sex with a willing partner.

That would be my reaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He helped you a lot. It’s time for you to help him as well. Hire a hooker and pay her to have sex with your husband twice a week. This will save your marriage.

He did not HELP her.

He is undoubtedly pursuing the career he desires. He thinks that entitles him to a live in hooker. It does not.

He is extremely lucky she gave him children, which is far more precious than “all” he has given her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Dh told me he expects sex from me because he gives me a comfortable life.

Sorry - hit post too soon.

DH and I had a very active sex life before we had kids. That naturally slowed down once we had two kids. DH has gone out of his way to make my life easier - very hands on, hired night and day help, sends me to a spa for a relaxing massage or day out for myself, etc. He has been really irritated with the lack of sex and wants more. He said that’s his only want and ask and it isn’t too much because he gives me a lot in return. I hear him but I don’t like feeling like I owe him sex because he’s a good husband.

Give him a hall pass.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
So why aren’t you having sex w your husband?
May want to have a convo with him on what the issues are..

I’m tired and don’t want nightly sex. I feel the max I can have is twice a week. He wants at least 4 times a week. That’s hard for most women.

Most women don't have 24/7 childcare help and spa days

Your kids are young but tha'ts suspicious as you only mentioned it when people were laying into you. Final verdict: troll

She also didn’t answer the question on how he is “demanding.”

Op here. I haven’t been responding much because I was busy with my kids.

He has had many talks with me about his expectations. Last night he told me I’m not giving him enough sex and he expects it because of “ all of this” and used his arms to show it. He elaborated that he works hard for me to have the luxuries I do and all he expects is frequent sex. He gave me 8 weeks to heal and now it’s time we get back to frequent sex. That to me is demanding.

That’s terrible. So this is a change? He
wasn’t like this after kid #1?

He was ready for sex but was a lot more patient and I was ready for sex more often because we had an easy baby. Now it’s harder with two kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
So why aren’t you having sex w your husband?
May want to have a convo with him on what the issues are..

I’m tired and don’t want nightly sex. I feel the max I can have is twice a week. He wants at least 4 times a week. That’s hard for most women.

Most women don't have 24/7 childcare help and spa days

Your kids are young but tha'ts suspicious as you only mentioned it when people were laying into you. Final verdict: troll

She also didn’t answer the question on how he is “demanding.”

Op here. I haven’t been responding much because I was busy with my kids.

He has had many talks with me about his expectations. Last night he told me I’m not giving him enough sex and he expects it because of “ all of this” and used his arms to show it. He elaborated that he works hard for me to have the luxuries I do and all he expects is frequent sex. He gave me 8 weeks to heal and now it’s time we get back to frequent sex. That to me is demanding.

Do you live in Iran or Saudi Arabia or something? That sounds straight out of the Koran.

No. We are white Americans.

It’s actually the Quran.

[Anonymous]

I think getting someone in the mood is where it's at. Seduction is important, even twenty years in. If the partners don't care, it's no fun. No one wants an obligation. It shouldn't be difficult provided there was passion and hunger to begin with.

[Anonymous]

OP, you husband is the ideal husband for the ladies on DCUM. Most women here complain about sexless marriages, husbands with low libido, not enough sex, etc. They would kill to replace their low libido men with your high libido husband.
This is the first time a woman on this forum complains about too much sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He helped you a lot. It’s time for you to help him as well. Hire a hooker and pay her to have sex with your husband twice a week. This will save your marriage.

He did not HELP her.

He is undoubtedly pursuing the career he desires. He thinks that entitles him to a live in hooker. It does not.

He is extremely lucky she gave him children, which is far more precious than “all” he has given her.

DP.

The op has absolutely no obligation whatsoever to have sex with her husband. Ever again.

And him? Her husband has absolutely no obligation to remain married to OP for even one more single day.

Good luck on the dating market as a single-mom, OP. Hope you’ll be fine when your kids have visitation and tell you how awesome their new mom is, and how she’s much younger and nicer than you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When he stops asking you for it, and/or seems satisfied with the twice weekly pity sex, that's when you need to worry. You are heading that way.

Now that OP is aware of his preference, I think this is probably true. She can do what she wants, but so can he.

+1

[Anonymous]

So sorry OP. You are giving him enough and telling him you can’t give him anymore right now and he is harassing you for more. He is not listening to your needs one bit. I don’t hear you say he loves you. Do you love him? He seems very transactional. I worry for your future with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one should force you to have sex. Your husband isn’t entitled to your body because he’s nice to you. Parenting his own kids isn’t going above and beyond. He’s a jerk.

Not exactly a jerk. He’s communicating his relational needs like an adult rather than staying silent and resentful, and then eventually getting sex elsewhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[list]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
So why aren’t you having sex w your husband?
May want to have a convo with him on what the issues are..

I’m tired and don’t want nightly sex. I feel the max I can have is twice a week. He wants at least 4 times a week. That’s hard for most women.

Most women don't have 24/7 childcare help and spa days

Your kids are young but tha'ts suspicious as you only mentioned it when people were laying into you. Final verdict: troll

She also didn’t answer the question on how he is “demanding.”

Op here. I haven’t been responding much because I was busy with my kids.

He has had many talks with me about his expectations. Last night he told me I’m not giving him enough sex and he expects it because of “ all of this” and used his arms to show it. He elaborated that he works hard for me to have the luxuries I do and all he expects is frequent sex. He gave me 8 weeks to heal and now it’s time we get back to frequent sex. That to me is demanding.

Op,

I'm sorry but,you married a jerk. I would rather lose some of the 'all of this' and not give him daily sex. Tell him the expectation is a big turn off. The more he demands the less you want it. I would either do without spa day, massages etc or get myself a part time job so I could treat myself better.

Buy him a blow up doll for the days you don't have sex

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
So why aren’t you having sex w your husband?
May want to have a convo with him on what the issues are..

I’m tired and don’t want nightly sex. I feel the max I can have is twice a week. He wants at least 4 times a week. That’s hard for most women.

Most women don't have 24/7 childcare help and spa days

Your kids are young but tha'ts suspicious as you only mentioned it when people were laying into you. Final verdict: troll

I don’t have 24/7 childcare. We had a night nanny 3x a week during the first 3 months. We have a par time nanny come 3x a week for 5 hours a day to help with older child.

The spa day isn’t always. He bought me two spa days so far.

I didn’t think age of kids was super relevant.

Mother of two here -
I think you are super pampered.

[Anonymous]

Twice a week is fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So sorry OP. You are giving him enough and telling him you can’t give him anymore right now and he is harassing you for more. He is not listening to your needs one bit. I don’t hear you say he loves you. Do you love him? He seems very transactional. I worry for your future with him.

If he needs more sex, she needs more nannies.