Single mom judgment/rant

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents who go on vacation without their kids get plenty of judgement too.

The key is to stop caring about what random co-workers think about you.

DH and I are going to Italy for a week for a child-free wedding, leaving 2 kids with grandma (and a sitter to help her), and every single person who has heard about it has been thrilled for us. Single mom OP is absolutely getting crapped on for no reason here.

Not the same at all. Your kids are from an intact family and have not faced the trauma of divorce. So, its fine if they stay with grandma and helper for a week. They are not being shuttled from one place to another.

Divorced OP has already subjected her kids to POS father and a broken family. So yeah sucks for her but please do not compare her with a normal intact family situation. She is a single mom by poor decision and bears some responsibility for that. She is not taking a two day break from taking care of a severely intellectually disabled child or from being a military wife. She is going for a vacation of 10 days and her kids are being shuttled between caregivers.

I hope you encounter the same kind of hate you put out into the world but tenfold.

So by your logic...

It’s ok to call out hate. You deserve all the shit coming your way.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents who go on vacation without their kids get plenty of judgement too.

The key is to stop caring about what random co-workers think about you.

DH and I are going to Italy for a week for a child-free wedding, leaving 2 kids with grandma (and a sitter to help her), and every single person who has heard about it has been thrilled for us. Single mom OP is absolutely getting crapped on for no reason here.

Not the same at all. Your kids are from an intact family and have not faced the trauma of divorce. So, its fine if they stay with grandma and helper for a week. They are not being shuttled from one place to another.

Divorced OP has already subjected her kids to POS father and a broken family. So yeah sucks for her but please do not compare her with a normal intact family situation. She is a single mom by poor decision and bears some responsibility for that. She is not taking a two day break from taking care of a severely intellectually disabled child or from being a military wife. She is going for a vacation of 10 days and her kids are being shuttled between caregivers.

I’m dying laughing. This is exactly the type of smug married lady who ends up getting left by their husband and in a terrible financial state. As someone else said, karma is coming for you.

[Anonymous]

People should be less judgmental in general but fwiw, I’m a single mom to a child with a disability and I wouldn’t leave her for a week and a half to go on vacation. You’re your child’s whole world, OP. That’s a really long time. I’ve never left her overnight for vacation. The only times I’ve left her overnight have been out of necessity (medical reasons both times).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People should be less judgmental in general but fwiw, I’m a single mom to a child with a disability and I wouldn’t leave her for a week and a half to go on vacation. You’re your child’s whole world, OP. That’s a really long time. I’ve never left her overnight for vacation. The only times I’ve left her overnight have been out of necessity (medical reasons both times).

Did you miss the part where OP wasnt asking if she should go on this trip?

[Anonymous]

Ugh what a gross thread. OP I hope you have a good trip and I hope your child has fun with grandparents and their other care takers.

There are so many threads making fun of mommy martyrs and then …this. Yuck.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People should be less judgmental in general but fwiw, I’m a single mom to a child with a disability and I wouldn’t leave her for a week and a half to go on vacation. You’re your child’s whole world, OP. That’s a really long time. I’ve never left her overnight for vacation. The only times I’ve left her overnight have been out of necessity (medical reasons both times).

In some families, particularly single parent families, one adult ends up being a be child’s “whole world”. It’s not ideal but it happens. In other cases, the child is lucky enough that they have multiple strong relationships. It sounds like OP’s child has multiple people in their life who love them and make them feel safe. That’s a good thing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People should be less judgmental in general but fwiw, I’m a single mom to a child with a disability and I wouldn’t leave her for a week and a half to go on vacation. You’re your child’s whole world, OP. That’s a really long time. I’ve never left her overnight for vacation. The only times I’ve left her overnight have been out of necessity (medical reasons both times).

Did you miss the part where OP wasnt asking if she should go on this trip?

She wasn’t asking if she should go on the trip, but she was expressing shock and dismay that people were judging her for doing it. And she thinks the judgement is because she’s a single mom. I’m saying I’m also a single mom, and I don’t judge her, but I wouldn’t take the trip. She seems to be assuming that it’s obviously ok to take the trip because she needs a break, and anyone who thinks otherwise is a judgmental a-hole. I don’t think it’s that clear-cut.

[Anonymous]

You’re not a single mom. Your child has a father who is present in their life. You’re leaving your child with their father, which is as it should be.

Enjoy your trip and don’t worry about what a coworker thinks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People should be less judgmental in general but fwiw, I’m a single mom to a child with a disability and I wouldn’t leave her for a week and a half to go on vacation. You’re your child’s whole world, OP. That’s a really long time. I’ve never left her overnight for vacation. The only times I’ve left her overnight have been out of necessity (medical reasons both times).

Did you miss the part where OP wasnt asking if she should go on this trip?

She wasn’t asking if she should go on the trip, but she was expressing shock and dismay that people were judging her for doing it. And she thinks the judgement is because she’s a single mom. I’m saying I’m also a single mom, and I don’t judge her, but I wouldn’t take the trip. She seems to be assuming that it’s obviously ok to take the trip because she needs a break, and anyone who thinks otherwise is a judgmental a-hole. I don’t think it’s that clear-cut.

Yes, she is expressing dismay that people like her coworker and you offer their shitty, unsoliceted opinion. She didn't ask her coworker or you what you thought about her plans. Yet her coworker decided she needed to make her opinion known in the rudest possible way. Also, if you are even a single mom, you should honestly know better than to judge other moms when they need a break. Do better.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You’re not a single mom. Your child has a father who is present in their life. You’re leaving your child with their father, which is as it should be.

Enjoy your trip and don’t worry about what a coworker thinks.

+1 I'm tired of people saying they are "single parents" when in fact, they are not.

This woman is a mom who happens to be divorced BUT the child's father is still involved on a regular basis. That means she is NOT a single parent but a divorced one.

IMO using the words "single parent" means there is ZERO support or involvement of any kind by the other parent. I know a woman who was actually on a local news feature story where she lamented how she was a "single parent" and was having trouble paying her taxes (in her fully-paid for million dollar home in MoCo). It was a blatant lie since her ex had given her his share of the house, had weekly custody of the kids, AND paid her generous child support.

But there she was, all boo hoo about how she was a "single parent." She also neglected to mention that her affair partner was living with her and the kids and was contributing to the household, too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not a single mom. Your child has a father who is present in their life. You’re leaving your child with their father, which is as it should be.

Enjoy your trip and don’t worry about what a coworker thinks.

+1 I'm tired of people saying they are "single parents" when in fact, they are not.

This woman is a mom who happens to be divorced BUT the child's father is still involved on a regular basis. That means she is NOT a single parent but a divorced one.

IMO using the words "single parent" means there is ZERO support or involvement of any kind by the other parent. I know a woman who was actually on a local news feature story where she lamented how she was a "single parent" and was having trouble paying her taxes (in her fully-paid for million dollar home in MoCo). It was a blatant lie since her ex had given her his share of the house, had weekly custody of the kids, AND paid her generous child support.

But there she was, all boo hoo about how she was a "single parent." She also neglected to mention that her affair partner was living with her and the kids and was contributing to the household, too.

Yeah, so much support every other weekend. She is rolling in support.

I think everyone who has not had to shoulder the majority of kid raising on their own should sit down and STFU.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not a single mom. Your child has a father who is present in their life. You’re leaving your child with their father, which is as it should be.

Enjoy your trip and don’t worry about what a coworker thinks.

+1 I'm tired of people saying they are "single parents" when in fact, they are not.

This woman is a mom who happens to be divorced BUT the child's father is still involved on a regular basis. That means she is NOT a single parent but a divorced one.

IMO using the words "single parent" means there is ZERO support or involvement of any kind by the other parent. I know a woman who was actually on a local news feature story where she lamented how she was a "single parent" and was having trouble paying her taxes (in her fully-paid for million dollar home in MoCo). It was a blatant lie since her ex had given her his share of the house, had weekly custody of the kids, AND paid her generous child support.

But there she was, all boo hoo about how she was a "single parent." She also neglected to mention that her affair partner was living with her and the kids and was contributing to the household, too.

That’s just your opinion, no more valid than anyone else’s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The difference between camp and what you are talking about is the kid probably wants to go to sleep away camp. You are just pawning your kid off on others so that you can have fun Huge difference.

Okay, forget the camp reference. What about parents just going on a trip on their own without their kids? You’re opposed to parents going away to have fun as a couple? Please share.

Yes. DH and I, did not go away for a vacation together without our kids. Period. And we had plenty of fun in our own house, we hosted a lot of parties, we have a huge social circle.

Children remained our priority and thankfully in our circle kids are a part of any celebration - birthdays, weddings, holidays etc.

When kids become older and go to camps etc away from home - feel free to go on couple-only trip.

How lucky you had a husband to share the workload with. You sound insanely privileged and clueless about single women raising kids on their own.

Luck and privilege has nothing to do with it. It is about having standards, having self-respect, having education and career, being worthy, not marrying losers and having control of your fertility. ( Not including women who have become widowed or their partner has become disabled or they have undergone catastrophic circumstances like war, pandemic, natural disasters, genocide etc).

Stop having sex with losers or use BC when you have sex. Do not marry men who are waving the red flags in front of you. Because when you become the woman who ignores all the red flags in men, then you yourself become a big huge red flag, that all the good men avoid.

You are a terrible person and your spouse has terrible judgment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not a single mom. Your child has a father who is present in their life. You’re leaving your child with their father, which is as it should be.

Enjoy your trip and don’t worry about what a coworker thinks.

+1 I'm tired of people saying they are "single parents" when in fact, they are not.

This woman is a mom who happens to be divorced BUT the child's father is still involved on a regular basis. That means she is NOT a single parent but a divorced one.

IMO using the words "single parent" means there is ZERO support or involvement of any kind by the other parent. I know a woman who was actually on a local news feature story where she lamented how she was a "single parent" and was having trouble paying her taxes (in her fully-paid for million dollar home in MoCo). It was a blatant lie since her ex had given her his share of the house, had weekly custody of the kids, AND paid her generous child support.

But there she was, all boo hoo about how she was a "single parent." She also neglected to mention that her affair partner was living with her and the kids and was contributing to the household, too.

Yeah, so much support every other weekend. She is rolling in support.

I think everyone who has not had to shoulder the majority of kid raising on their own should sit down and STFU.

Uh, did you read? Not every case is the same. This woman is NOT a single parent and is NOT shoulderning the majority of kid raising. Curb your defensiveness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You’re not a single mom. Your child has a father who is present in their life. You’re leaving your child with their father, which is as it should be.

Enjoy your trip and don’t worry about what a coworker thinks.

+1 I'm tired of people saying they are "single parents" when in fact, they are not.

This woman is a mom who happens to be divorced BUT the child's father is still involved on a regular basis. That means she is NOT a single parent but a divorced one.

IMO using the words "single parent" means there is ZERO support or involvement of any kind by the other parent. I know a woman who was actually on a local news feature story where she lamented how she was a "single parent" and was having trouble paying her taxes (in her fully-paid for million dollar home in MoCo). It was a blatant lie since her ex had given her his share of the house, had weekly custody of the kids, AND paid her generous child support.

But there she was, all boo hoo about how she was a "single parent." She also neglected to mention that her affair partner was living with her and the kids and was contributing to the household, too.

Yeah, so much support every other weekend. She is rolling in support.

I think everyone who has not had to shoulder the majority of kid raising on their own should sit down and STFU.

Uh, did you read? Not every case is the same. This woman is NOT a single parent and is NOT shoulderning the majority of kid raising. Curb your defensiveness.

I did read it. Did you? Her ex gets the kid every other weekend at best. So that's twice a month. Who do you think does all of the work when he is not around?

You're just here to shit on single moms and I'm tired of old biddies like you. Takes a super miserable person to lecture women doing all the work on nominclature.