Elegant comeback ideas for public school parents who

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are they saying "well my kid went to Public HS and is going to Same Ivy" or are they just...sharing where their kid got it?

This. If someone is saying "Well Larla is also going to Yale and that's without having blown 300k on private tuition" then by all means say "Congratulations but I have no regrets about private school because it was the learning environment we thought would best prepare our kids for college and beyond." Like just don't engage on the premise that private school is about getting into top colleges (especially because this is not a good reason to send kids to private schools!).

But I suspect that what is actually happening is that OP knows people who are just sharing the good news of their kid getting into top schools and OP is mentally doing the math on how those kids were able to do that without spending money on private school tuition and feeling like a chump and wants to one-up these people somehow as an act of defensiveness. This is all about OP's insecurities and nothing to do with the other people. As I said, sending your kids to private just to get into highly competitive colleges is a fool's errand -- it doesn't always work out that way and it's way too much money to view as an investment in a specific outcome. You have to choose private for it's intrinsic qualities and accept that college is going to work out the way it works out -- not every kid is Ivy League material even at very competitive private HSs.

OP LITERALLY says the comments are passive aggressive so stop implying that she’s sensitive to the topic and taking it the wrong way. Everyone knows that colleges and universities cannot fill their classes with solely private school kids so of course, public school kids will be there. I hate it when public school parents find their way into this forum.

This forum is public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are they saying "well my kid went to Public HS and is going to Same Ivy" or are they just...sharing where their kid got it?

This. If someone is saying "Well Larla is also going to Yale and that's without having blown 300k on private tuition" then by all means say "Congratulations but I have no regrets about private school because it was the learning environment we thought would best prepare our kids for college and beyond." Like just don't engage on the premise that private school is about getting into top colleges (especially because this is not a good reason to send kids to private schools!).

But I suspect that what is actually happening is that OP knows people who are just sharing the good news of their kid getting into top schools and OP is mentally doing the math on how those kids were able to do that without spending money on private school tuition and feeling like a chump and wants to one-up these people somehow as an act of defensiveness. This is all about OP's insecurities and nothing to do with the other people. As I said, sending your kids to private just to get into highly competitive colleges is a fool's errand -- it doesn't always work out that way and it's way too much money to view as an investment in a specific outcome. You have to choose private for it's intrinsic qualities and accept that college is going to work out the way it works out -- not every kid is Ivy League material even at very competitive private HSs.

OP LITERALLY says the comments are passive aggressive so stop implying that she’s sensitive to the topic and taking it the wrong way. Everyone knows that colleges and universities cannot fill their classes with solely private school kids so of course, public school kids will be there. I hate it when public school parents find their way into this forum.

This forum is public.

Like those dirty dirty public school kids

[Anonymous]

What does college acceptance have to do with anything? The choice to send a child to private school is to get a great education and have a positive, formative experience. Public school can offer that as well, but those of us who go the private route think it's the better choice for our particular child. It's not a competition. If your private-school child graduates well-educated, happy and healthy, that's all that matters and the tuition was absolutely worth every penny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What does college acceptance have to do with anything? The choice to send a child to private school is to get a great education and have a positive, formative experience. Public school can offer that as well, but those of us who go the private route think it's the better choice for our particular child. It's not a competition. If your private-school child graduates well-educated, happy and healthy, that's all that matters and the tuition was absolutely worth every penny.

Exactly and our kids have been in private since they were 2 since Nursery school. 16 years of small classes, beautiful facilities, parent engagement, opportunities both educationally and personally that would never happen in public. I would not ever rethink 16 years of so many great experiences and facilities over 4 years. Anyone that is comparing those two things has no idea.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does college acceptance have to do with anything? The choice to send a child to private school is to get a great education and have a positive, formative experience. Public school can offer that as well, but those of us who go the private route think it's the better choice for our particular child. It's not a competition. If your private-school child graduates well-educated, happy and healthy, that's all that matters and the tuition was absolutely worth every penny.

Exactly and our kids have been in private since they were 2 since Nursery school. 16 years of small classes, beautiful facilities, parent engagement, opportunities both educationally and personally that would never happen in public. I would not ever rethink 16 years of so many great experiences and facilities over 4 years. Anyone that is comparing those two things has no idea.

Everyone is in “private” at two years old. 🙄🙄

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does college acceptance have to do with anything? The choice to send a child to private school is to get a great education and have a positive, formative experience. Public school can offer that as well, but those of us who go the private route think it's the better choice for our particular child. It's not a competition. If your private-school child graduates well-educated, happy and healthy, that's all that matters and the tuition was absolutely worth every penny.

Exactly and our kids have been in private since they were 2 since Nursery school. 16 years of small classes, beautiful facilities, parent engagement, opportunities both educationally and personally that would never happen in public. I would not ever rethink 16 years of so many great experiences and facilities over 4 years. Anyone that is comparing those two things has no idea.

But you have limited experience so how can you compare?

[Anonymous]

Just be honest. It wasn’t about college admissions it was about self segregation as we are better than you no matter what.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are they saying "well my kid went to Public HS and is going to Same Ivy" or are they just...sharing where their kid got it?

This. If someone is saying "Well Larla is also going to Yale and that's without having blown 300k on private tuition" then by all means say "Congratulations but I have no regrets about private school because it was the learning environment we thought would best prepare our kids for college and beyond." Like just don't engage on the premise that private school is about getting into top colleges (especially because this is not a good reason to send kids to private schools!).

But I suspect that what is actually happening is that OP knows people who are just sharing the good news of their kid getting into top schools and OP is mentally doing the math on how those kids were able to do that without spending money on private school tuition and feeling like a chump and wants to one-up these people somehow as an act of defensiveness. This is all about OP's insecurities and nothing to do with the other people. As I said, sending your kids to private just to get into highly competitive colleges is a fool's errand -- it doesn't always work out that way and it's way too much money to view as an investment in a specific outcome. You have to choose private for it's intrinsic qualities and accept that college is going to work out the way it works out -- not every kid is Ivy League material even at very competitive private HSs.

OP LITERALLY says the comments are passive aggressive so stop implying that she’s sensitive to the topic and taking it the wrong way. Everyone knows that colleges and universities cannot fill their classes with solely private school kids so of course, public school kids will be there. I hate it when public school parents find their way into this forum.

This forum is public.

Like those dirty dirty public school kids

😂😂😂 What is wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What does college acceptance have to do with anything? The choice to send a child to private school is to get a great education and have a positive, formative experience. Public school can offer that as well, but those of us who go the private route think it's the better choice for our particular child. It's not a competition. If your private-school child graduates well-educated, happy and healthy, that's all that matters and the tuition was absolutely worth every penny.

Exactly and our kids have been in private since they were 2 since Nursery school. 16 years of small classes, beautiful facilities, parent engagement, opportunities both educationally and personally that would never happen in public. I would not ever rethink 16 years of so many great experiences and facilities over 4 years. Anyone that is comparing those two things has no idea.

But you have limited experience so how can you compare?

My friends with similar values who were in public all fled publics for privates. Years of their bad experiences shaped my opinions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would say, wow they both have had COMPLETELY different journeys and experiences and now they get to go to the same school and learn from one another. And then follow up with a question that shows your kid has a better educational experience, like, “Jenny was thrilled when her Building, Engineering and Design group went to visit the Tesla engineering plant and saw them demonstrate blah blah blah - did Buddy Bud at The Worst Public School ever get a chance to do that too?”

You just put a smile on my face!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The best "come back" or revenge, is success. Just wait- wait until your kids succeed and theirs don't....and then say it to yourself and nobody else....because the pissing contest is just ridiculous, be nice.

Wow - what a terrible thing to say. The real message here is the OP - and others (like the PP) - are upset that OPs kid does not have a leg up to a public school kid and now want to put the mom in her PLACE??? Yikes. This kind of thinking is why Trump won people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can't help but laugh at adults who convince themselves all the kids who get into a particular college are equal. Life doesn't reset when they all get on campus. And in an era of kids keeping their teen friend group for the rest of their lives, well worth the money to put them in a setting with amazing kids from great families.

Because it's not possible to be an amazing kid or a great family unless you are a private school family.

Ok. Got it. There's the elegant comeback.

Glad you caught on.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The best "come back" or revenge, is success. Just wait- wait until your kids succeed and theirs don't....and then say it to yourself and nobody else....because the pissing contest is just ridiculous, be nice.

Wow - what a terrible thing to say. The real message here is the OP - and others (like the PP) - are upset that OPs kid does not have a leg up to a public school kid and now want to put the mom in her PLACE??? Yikes. This kind of thinking is why Trump won people.

These are the people voted him in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any elegant comeback ideas for when a parent highlights their public school child got into the same college(s) as our private school daughter? The passive-aggressive point they are trying to make is that we wasted our money on private school tuition and we should have just stayed in the public system and would have ended up at the same place. So far, I've been using variations of "Good for you/them!"

It's obviously stinging you but stand tall and be proud of the investment you made in your child! What else would you have done with your money! And be comforted in the fact your kid came out so much better. Trust me, it was worth it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Any elegant comeback ideas for when a parent highlights their public school child got into the same college(s) as our private school daughter? The passive-aggressive point they are trying to make is that we wasted our money on private school tuition and we should have just stayed in the public system and would have ended up at the same place. So far, I've been using variations of "Good for you/them!"

Try not to let it get to you. My kid has been in both public and private school, and there are so many factors in educational settings beyond just college placement. Socialization, instruction tailored to your kid, possible aids for special needs, athletic opportunities, and more. Different kids have different needs and different strengths, and if we are fortunate to be able to choose the best setting we can, then school will look a bit different for each kid.