Sophomore’s new suite mate is 37

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Come on people. This is a completely fabricated story. Don’t be so gullible.

Maybe, maybe not.

My kid recently graduated from a large public university, not in the DMV. There were a lot of off campus apartment complexes that were marketed towards students, and offered individual leases and roommate matching--so basically if you were a single but wanted the lower price point of just one bedroom in a four bedroom unit, the complex would find you 3 roommates to share the apartment with.
The thing is, because they were off campus and not run by the university-literally anyone could rent there. Every year, there were parents who would post that their 19 year old sophomore was matched with a 30 something or 40 something year old adult that had absolutely nothing to do with the university.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this what is known as "concern trolling?

Not really.

What kind of trolling is it then?

Op here I get that it seems so weird/ unlikely and touches on hot button issues so I understand it might seem like a troll post-fair enough. It is true, though, and as I said in my first post this is not an anti all gender housing post-if anything it’s an anti mixed age housing post.

So age discrimination is ok?

I totally get where you are coming from, OP and would not want my daughter in the same dorm as a 37 year old man. But when you opt for gender inclusive housing, you lose control on who defines what inclusive means and are stuck in the position of being age exclusive.

How uncomfortable is your daughter? Tell her to stand up for herself here.

Depending on the state, this is most likely not actionable age discrimination.

If they're an older student on the GI bill, it may be actionable. If they're public it is also bad publicity they won't want.

[Anonymous]

How long before this dude starts openly watching porn in the dorm room? I give it two weeks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand why a 18 year old male suitemate is better than a 37 year old suitemate.

The only reason I can think of would be that you are OK with her having sex with the 18 year old but not the 37 year old.

Please. Of course you know why.

[Anonymous]

Hard no. One of my friends had a roommate who was 22 and we thought that was weird at the time (80s). OTOH, getting alcohol was never a problem.

[Anonymous]

I think if your dd is uncomfortable, examinating the why and the how and the is this good/bad doesn't even matter. I'd focus on switching because ultimately that is what matters and is the needed resolution based on comfort level.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's really weird. I'm assuming this is a large state school of some sort.

Is this VCU? Friend had a similar experience. Cannot imagine it works for either the 18-year-olds or the 37-year-old - and it seems like there may be enough older students to house them together. I'd be less than thrilled at either age to be rooming with the other age during college.

[Anonymous]

I'd buy DD out and get her a single.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this what is known as "concern trolling?

Not really.

What kind of trolling is it then?

Op here I get that it seems so weird/ unlikely and touches on hot button issues so I understand it might seem like a troll post-fair enough. It is true, though, and as I said in my first post this is not an anti all gender housing post-if anything it’s an anti mixed age housing post.

So age discrimination is ok?

I totally get where you are coming from, OP and would not want my daughter in the same dorm as a 37 year old man. But when you opt for gender inclusive housing, you lose control on who defines what inclusive means and are stuck in the position of being age exclusive.

How uncomfortable is your daughter? Tell her to stand up for herself here.

Depending on the state, this is most likely not actionable age discrimination.

If they're an older student on the GI bill, it may be actionable. If they're public it is also bad publicity they won't want.

and if the college also has housing for older students, e.g grad student housing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's a little weird that there isn't an age limit on undergraduate housing.

that would be grossly discriminatory.

I'd lawsuit it. I don't think any college wants to be known as the school that's forcing 18 year old girls to room with 37 year old men. Find that school. It doesn't exist. This was probably an administrative idiot and subsequent error. The moment the university lawyers get wind of this, it will be resolved. No university wants that limelight.

But they didn’t “force”—the girl opted into inclusive housing.
She just had her own narrowly-defined view of how much she was willing to “include”

The red line for some is sex-based.
Apparently for OP’s family, mixed sex is fine, but mixed-age was something they didn’t anticipate

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would be raising hell. Sorry. 37 is not 18. Creepy.

Agree. Why would a 37 year old want to live on campus?

Ever hear of Willie Sutton?

No.

[Anonymous]

I have two in college and one that will attend soon and the thought of an 18 year old and a 37 year old, opposite genders, being roommates is not something I could ever imagine. If you can't ever conceive of such a circumstance, how would you know to specify that is NOT acceptable?

By the way I'd go ballistic if my DC was roommates with a 37 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have two in college and one that will attend soon and the thought of an 18 year old and a 37 year old, opposite genders, being roommates is not something I could ever imagine. If you can't ever conceive of such a circumstance, how would you know to specify that is NOT acceptable?

By the way I'd go ballistic if my DC was roommates with a 37 year old.

"Go ballistic" all you want, but an 18 year old college student is an adult and can make their own choices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this what is known as "concern trolling?

Not really.

What kind of trolling is it then?

Op here I get that it seems so weird/ unlikely and touches on hot button issues so I understand it might seem like a troll post-fair enough. It is true, though, and as I said in my first post this is not an anti all gender housing post-if anything it’s an anti mixed age housing post.

So age discrimination is ok?

I totally get where you are coming from, OP and would not want my daughter in the same dorm as a 37 year old man. But when you opt for gender inclusive housing, you lose control on who defines what inclusive means and are stuck in the position of being age exclusive.

How uncomfortable is your daughter? Tell her to stand up for herself here.

Depending on the state, this is most likely not actionable age discrimination.

If they're an older student on the GI bill, it may be actionable. If they're public it is also bad publicity they won't want.

and if the college also has housing for older students, e.g grad student housing?

You're assuming that older under grads qualify for grad student housing

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Is this what is known as "concern trolling?

Not really.

What kind of trolling is it then?

Op here I get that it seems so weird/ unlikely and touches on hot button issues so I understand it might seem like a troll post-fair enough. It is true, though, and as I said in my first post this is not an anti all gender housing post-if anything it’s an anti mixed age housing post.

So age discrimination is ok?

I totally get where you are coming from, OP and would not want my daughter in the same dorm as a 37 year old man. But when you opt for gender inclusive housing, you lose control on who defines what inclusive means and are stuck in the position of being age exclusive.

How uncomfortable is your daughter? Tell her to stand up for herself here.

DP

Yes, age discrimination is okay & warranted in some cases. Would you want your 8 year old playing in a youth sports league with 17 year old athletes ? Of course not. But the 17 year old can play in a league with others who are closer in age and with respect to physical stature. Same with the 37 year old student living in the same house with 18 & 19 year old students. There is other more age appropriate housing available for the older student who, in this matter, is the exception among the housemates.