Are you low key about your wealth?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm very modest about it. My baby was wrapped in a Harvard blanket, so I told people that I got it at a thrift shop.

And we have the smallest yacht of anyone we know b

Oh my heavens, I used to be wealthy but when I had to downsize to a Hinckley, let 3 of my 5 domestic staff go, and begin renting out the caretakers cottage across my home’s courtyard in Gstaad, it was very humbling. Thank God, the 6br cottage in Maine is still in the family though.

But how much does it cost for upkeep

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm very modest about it. My baby was wrapped in a Harvard blanket, so I told people that I got it at a thrift shop.

And we have the smallest yacht of anyone we know b

Oh my heavens, I used to be wealthy but when I had to downsize to a Hinckley, let 3 of my 5 domestic staff go, and begin renting out the caretakers cottage across my home’s courtyard in Gstaad, it was very humbling. Thank God, the 6br cottage in Maine is still in the family though.

Gstaad is so yesterday, so why go back? When you get desperate you can convert the Maine cottage into a quaint B&B and rehire the 3 staff you let go. The Hinkley is a perfect Maine boat for visiting little cove towns and eating those precious lobster rolls. You can charge your guests a fortune for that little adventure.

[Anonymous]

Posting on social media is tacky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is wealthy?

I guess for purposes of my question, I just mean, if you consider yourself wealthy, whatever that level of income/net worth is - are you open with others about it, do you keep it under wraps, do you do showy things (wear expensive clothing, live in a mansion, openly discuss the cost of things you do like travel, home projects, etc.)?

As for us, HHI a bit over $1M, NW about $4M, and I consider us wealthy but mostly low key. Never upgraded our house; still live in the same neighborhood as we did in our 20s when our HHI was 20% of what it is now. Send the kids to public. But...we have done some showy things too, like join an exclusive country club, take nice trips (and I do sometimes post photos), treat the kids' friends to expensive outings (like sporting events/concerts). So maybe we are flaunty, I don't know. The thought came up because a cousin complained to me about another one of our cousins who just planned a $40k trip to Italy. Cousin #1 thought cousin #2 was obnoxious for discussing the trip details. Cousin #1 is just as wealthy as cousin #2 so I'm thinking #2 didn't think anything of discussing price since he knew #1 could easily afford such a trip if he wanted.

I love the idea of being modest and quiet about wealth. But in practice, living large is also pretty fun. Just wondered how other people feel about it, or what they're willing to admit to. Would anyone actually confess that it's fun to appear wealthy, to be envied, to have more than most? I'd say it is part fun, but also part shameful. I'm now looking at cousin #2 like, crap, I don't want #1 or anyone else to think I'm obnoxious/braggy/flaunty.

To me this isn't wealthy.

[Anonymous]

I'm wealthy in good deeds.

Money, also, but that's not the part I value.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is wealthy?

I guess for purposes of my question, I just mean, if you consider yourself wealthy, whatever that level of income/net worth is - are you open with others about it, do you keep it under wraps, do you do showy things (wear expensive clothing, live in a mansion, openly discuss the cost of things you do like travel, home projects, etc.)?

As for us, HHI a bit over $1M, NW about $4M, and I consider us wealthy but mostly low key. Never upgraded our house; still live in the same neighborhood as we did in our 20s when our HHI was 20% of what it is now. Send the kids to public. But...we have done some showy things too, like join an exclusive country club, take nice trips (and I do sometimes post photos), treat the kids' friends to expensive outings (like sporting events/concerts). So maybe we are flaunty, I don't know. The thought came up because a cousin complained to me about another one of our cousins who just planned a $40k trip to Italy. Cousin #1 thought cousin #2 was obnoxious for discussing the trip details. Cousin #1 is just as wealthy as cousin #2 so I'm thinking #2 didn't think anything of discussing price since he knew #1 could easily afford such a trip if he wanted.

I love the idea of being modest and quiet about wealth. But in practice, living large is also pretty fun. Just wondered how other people feel about it, or what they're willing to admit to. Would anyone actually confess that it's fun to appear wealthy, to be envied, to have more than most? I'd say it is part fun, but also part shameful. I'm now looking at cousin #2 like, crap, I don't want #1 or anyone else to think I'm obnoxious/braggy/flaunty.

To me this isn't wealthy.

What is wealthy to you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would consider us to be wealthy (early 40s, about $10M net worth) and we're probably somewhere in the middle. I think you have to define "flaunt".

We present as UMC for sure - fit, nice clothes and accessories, nice skin/hair/teeth, hobbies like golf and tennis. We go on very nice vacations and often stay in really nice accommodations. But we're not ones to post social media photos of ourselves in first class or staying at the Four Seasons. So in that way, no I don't think we're flashy. Plus, we know people worth triple-digit-million dollars and fly private, so we're well aware of broader context.

But we do drive nice luxury cars and I have nice jewelry and bags. So I'm sure some people would see me getting out of my (white) luxury SUV, wearing a Moncler jacket, and wearing a Love bracelet and think I'm the height of flash.

Yeah

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is wealthy?

I guess for purposes of my question, I just mean, if you consider yourself wealthy, whatever that level of income/net worth is - are you open with others about it, do you keep it under wraps, do you do showy things (wear expensive clothing, live in a mansion, openly discuss the cost of things you do like travel, home projects, etc.)?

As for us, HHI a bit over $1M, NW about $4M, and I consider us wealthy but mostly low key. Never upgraded our house; still live in the same neighborhood as we did in our 20s when our HHI was 20% of what it is now. Send the kids to public. But...we have done some showy things too, like join an exclusive country club, take nice trips (and I do sometimes post photos), treat the kids' friends to expensive outings (like sporting events/concerts). So maybe we are flaunty, I don't know. The thought came up because a cousin complained to me about another one of our cousins who just planned a $40k trip to Italy. Cousin #1 thought cousin #2 was obnoxious for discussing the trip details. Cousin #1 is just as wealthy as cousin #2 so I'm thinking #2 didn't think anything of discussing price since he knew #1 could easily afford such a trip if he wanted.

I love the idea of being modest and quiet about wealth. But in practice, living large is also pretty fun. Just wondered how other people feel about it, or what they're willing to admit to. Would anyone actually confess that it's fun to appear wealthy, to be envied, to have more than most? I'd say it is part fun, but also part shameful. I'm now looking at cousin #2 like, crap, I don't want #1 or anyone else to think I'm obnoxious/braggy/flaunty.

To me this isn't wealthy.

What is wealthy to you?

An earlier PP put it at greater than $10 million.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is wealthy?

I guess for purposes of my question, I just mean, if you consider yourself wealthy, whatever that level of income/net worth is - are you open with others about it, do you keep it under wraps, do you do showy things (wear expensive clothing, live in a mansion, openly discuss the cost of things you do like travel, home projects, etc.)?

As for us, HHI a bit over $1M, NW about $4M, and I consider us wealthy but mostly low key. Never upgraded our house; still live in the same neighborhood as we did in our 20s when our HHI was 20% of what it is now. Send the kids to public. But...we have done some showy things too, like join an exclusive country club, take nice trips (and I do sometimes post photos), treat the kids' friends to expensive outings (like sporting events/concerts). So maybe we are flaunty, I don't know. The thought came up because a cousin complained to me about another one of our cousins who just planned a $40k trip to Italy. Cousin #1 thought cousin #2 was obnoxious for discussing the trip details. Cousin #1 is just as wealthy as cousin #2 so I'm thinking #2 didn't think anything of discussing price since he knew #1 could easily afford such a trip if he wanted.

I love the idea of being modest and quiet about wealth. But in practice, living large is also pretty fun. Just wondered how other people feel about it, or what they're willing to admit to. Would anyone actually confess that it's fun to appear wealthy, to be envied, to have more than most? I'd say it is part fun, but also part shameful. I'm now looking at cousin #2 like, crap, I don't want #1 or anyone else to think I'm obnoxious/braggy/flaunty.

To me this isn't wealthy.

What is wealthy to you?

An earlier PP put it at greater than $10 million.

$5m IS wealthy, $10m is wealthier. If you had a $2.5m net worth in 2022, you were in the top 2% of Americans. Can we all agree that the top 2% of Americans are wealthy, or should we limit this category to the top 1%?

https://www.kiplinger.com/personal-finance/605075/are-you-rich

[Anonymous]

Not wealthy but if I were I would not flaunt it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is wealthy?

I guess for purposes of my question, I just mean, if you consider yourself wealthy, whatever that level of income/net worth is - are you open with others about it, do you keep it under wraps, do you do showy things (wear expensive clothing, live in a mansion, openly discuss the cost of things you do like travel, home projects, etc.)?

As for us, HHI a bit over $1M, NW about $4M, and I consider us wealthy but mostly low key. Never upgraded our house; still live in the same neighborhood as we did in our 20s when our HHI was 20% of what it is now. Send the kids to public. But...we have done some showy things too, like join an exclusive country club, take nice trips (and I do sometimes post photos), treat the kids' friends to expensive outings (like sporting events/concerts). So maybe we are flaunty, I don't know. The thought came up because a cousin complained to me about another one of our cousins who just planned a $40k trip to Italy. Cousin #1 thought cousin #2 was obnoxious for discussing the trip details. Cousin #1 is just as wealthy as cousin #2 so I'm thinking #2 didn't think anything of discussing price since he knew #1 could easily afford such a trip if he wanted.

I love the idea of being modest and quiet about wealth. But in practice, living large is also pretty fun. Just wondered how other people feel about it, or what they're willing to admit to. Would anyone actually confess that it's fun to appear wealthy, to be envied, to have more than most? I'd say it is part fun, but also part shameful. I'm now looking at cousin #2 like, crap, I don't want #1 or anyone else to think I'm obnoxious/braggy/flaunty.

To me this isn't wealthy.

What is wealthy to you?

An earlier PP put it at greater than $10 million.

$5m IS wealthy, $10m is wealthier. If you had a $2.5m net worth in 2022, you were in the top 2% of Americans. Can we all agree that the top 2% of Americans are wealthy, or should we limit this category to the top 1%?

https://www.kiplinger.com/personal-finance/605075/are-you-rich

Yes, top 1%. $2.5M NW is not enough to stop working, so that’s not wealthy.

[Anonymous]

Yes! Very much so. I have a lot of guilt about it so live very low key.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting how so far everyone seems to feel it's a virtue to live quietly versus flashily. Seems that many people stated pridefully some version of "most people would have no idea how rich we are."

Why is that, I wonder? Because everybody WANTS to be rich, right? So when you get there, why do you then want to appear as though you're not?

Or maybe...you just want people to admire that you are rich, but also modest and loveable at the same time. Worthy of envy, but not hatred.

Not snarking, I'm just as guilty. Just interested in what people think about it.

Our family and friends circle is distinctly middle class/upper middle class. We do not want to flaunt anything, or make anyone uncomfortable. We very much value our friendships with people that knew us when we had a whole 10K in a CD.

I also think it's a function of how you're used to living. Since we started with nothing, we're used to living on very little. We aren't, but we also don't care about country clubs or buying whatever the latest fashion is, or fancy cars. When I think back to then versus now, the biggest difference is that I don't worry about balancing the checkbook, making sure that we have what we need in an account, because we *always* do, and then some. If we see something we like, we buy it. We definitely do things that make our lives easier, like outsourcing landscaping and house cleaning. If we take trips abroad, we travel business, not economy. We don't stay at the most expensive hotels, but we also don't stay at the Holiday Inn. We are fairly strict with DD because we don't want her taking our resources for granted, but we also don't make her wait until Christmas or birthday if she say needs a new computer. I feel like things have changed a bit, but not substantially.

You are mc- not weathy.

[Anonymous]

We are fairly wealthy, retired NW 20m. We try to maintain a low profile but people know. We feel guilty so many family and friends who are struggling to keep going. My husband says it’s “unsportsmanlike” to brag, gloat, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It is interesting how so far everyone seems to feel it's a virtue to live quietly versus flashily. Seems that many people stated pridefully some version of "most people would have no idea how rich we are."

Why is that, I wonder? Because everybody WANTS to be rich, right? So when you get there, why do you then want to appear as though you're not?

Or maybe...you just want people to admire that you are rich, but also modest and loveable at the same time. Worthy of envy, but not hatred.

Not snarking, I'm just as guilty. Just interested in what people think about it.

Our family and friends circle is distinctly middle class/upper middle class. We do not want to flaunt anything, or make anyone uncomfortable. We very much value our friendships with people that knew us when we had a whole 10K in a CD.

I also think it's a function of how you're used to living. Since we started with nothing, we're used to living on very little. We aren't, but we also don't care about country clubs or buying whatever the latest fashion is, or fancy cars. When I think back to then versus now, the biggest difference is that I don't worry about balancing the checkbook, making sure that we have what we need in an account, because we *always* do, and then some. If we see something we like, we buy it. We definitely do things that make our lives easier, like outsourcing landscaping and house cleaning. If we take trips abroad, we travel business, not economy. We don't stay at the most expensive hotels, but we also don't stay at the Holiday Inn. We are fairly strict with DD because we don't want her taking our resources for granted, but we also don't make her wait until Christmas or birthday if she say needs a new computer. I feel like things have changed a bit, but not substantially.

You are mc- not weathy.

That's exactly my point. That is how we present. Our net worth is upwards of 35M, so wealthy by anyone's standards.