Absolutely no sex drive…and minimal sexual attraction

[Anonymous]

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yeah, we all know that stuff. Sex drive is 99% hormonal, and if you have none due to the many reasons people listed here, you'd be shocked at how ineffective things that used to work are. Watch SATC 2, as the portrayal of Samantha doing "everything" to get her groove back and failing was pretty darn accurate. Her saving grace was that she was single.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yeah, we all know that stuff. Sex drive is 99% hormonal, and if you have none due to the many reasons people listed here, you'd be shocked at how ineffective things that used to work are. Watch SATC 2, as the portrayal of Samantha doing "everything" to get her groove back and failing was pretty darn accurate. Her saving grace was that she was single.

Yes, I get that as I am 61 and on no hrt. OP is 40- her libido loss is less likely to be purely hormonal.

[Anonymous]

Vaginal Estrogen Cream. I don't understand why this is not prescribed to women who lose their drive after childbirth?

[Anonymous]

I am seeing quite a few comments from women pointing to the husband as the issue. On this forum on so many issues it’s the man’s fault. And now I am seriously wondering whether it is remotely possible for a man to “please” a woman and make her happy? I have the feeling that women have a frame of reference and their bfs/hubbys are put against it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am seeing quite a few comments from women pointing to the husband as the issue. On this forum on so many issues it’s the man’s fault. And now I am seriously wondering whether it is remotely possible for a man to “please” a woman and make her happy? I have the feeling that women have a frame of reference and their bfs/hubbys are put against it.

On DCUM everything is the man’s fault

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yes.

And if it has not been recommended yet, read the book Come as You Are.

You need to learn (or re-learn) to love your self first, including the sensual side of yourself. Self awareness is key (the book explains it all).

And yes to sex-toys; particularly vibrators. But that begs the question:

- how do you buy, you-know-whats, and not get caught? If you dont want to use the section of Amazon called “sexual health” (and that’s understandable), there are options.

Did you know CVS sells a surprising variety of good quality toys? You can even pay in cash in you like.

And vibrators come in so many new types! If you’ve given up on the kind you tied once, 20 years ago, think again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yes.

And if it has not been recommended yet, read the book Come as You Are.

You need to learn (or re-learn) to love your self first, including the sensual side of yourself. Self awareness is key (the book explains it all).

And yes to sex-toys; particularly vibrators. But that begs the question:

- how do you buy, you-know-whats, and not get caught? If you dont want to use the section of Amazon called “sexual health” (and that’s understandable), there are options.

Did you know CVS sells a surprising variety of good quality toys? You can even pay in cash in you like.

And vibrators come in so many new types! If you’ve given up on the kind you tied once, 20 years ago, think again.

Any recommendations on toys?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yes.

And if it has not been recommended yet, read the book Come as You Are.

You need to learn (or re-learn) to love your self first, including the sensual side of yourself. Self awareness is key (the book explains it all).

And yes to sex-toys; particularly vibrators. But that begs the question:

- how do you buy, you-know-whats, and not get caught? If you dont want to use the section of Amazon called “sexual health” (and that’s understandable), there are options.

Did you know CVS sells a surprising variety of good quality toys? You can even pay in cash in you like.

And vibrators come in so many new types! If you’ve given up on the kind you tied once, 20 years ago, think again.

Any recommendations on toys?

This one is outstanding:

https://www.cvs.com/shop/lelo-sona-cerise-prodid-2810099

But I have never seen it in stock at CVS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yes.

And if it has not been recommended yet, read the book Come as You Are.

You need to learn (or re-learn) to love your self first, including the sensual side of yourself. Self awareness is key (the book explains it all).

And yes to sex-toys; particularly vibrators. But that begs the question:

- how do you buy, you-know-whats, and not get caught? If you dont want to use the section of Amazon called “sexual health” (and that’s understandable), there are options.

Did you know CVS sells a surprising variety of good quality toys? You can even pay in cash in you like.

And vibrators come in so many new types! If you’ve given up on the kind you tied once, 20 years ago, think again.

Any recommendations on toys?

This one is outstanding:

https://www.cvs.com/shop/lelo-sona-cerise-prodid-2810099

But I have never seen it in stock at CVS.

This one is also quite good:

https://www.cvs.com/shop/plusone-fluttering-arouser-prodid-180215

And you can’t go wrong with a wand


https://www.cvs.com/shop/plusone-vibrating-wand-prodid-508404

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Get some lube, some very sexy lingerie, look him straight in the eye, and tell him: "I want you to fxxcm me in my axxhhole."

Gross

[Anonymous]

This is a you problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yes.

And if it has not been recommended yet, read the book Come as You Are.

You need to learn (or re-learn) to love your self first, including the sensual side of yourself. Self awareness is key (the book explains it all).

And yes to sex-toys; particularly vibrators. But that begs the question:

- how do you buy, you-know-whats, and not get caught? If you dont want to use the section of Amazon called “sexual health” (and that’s understandable), there are options.

Did you know CVS sells a surprising variety of good quality toys? You can even pay in cash in you like.

And vibrators come in so many new types! If you’ve given up on the kind you tied once, 20 years ago, think again.

Any recommendations on toys?

This one is outstanding:

https://www.cvs.com/shop/lelo-sona-cerise-prodid-2810099

But I have never seen it in stock at CVS.


Do not skimp. LELO is the brand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Start by getting tactile with yourself: hard work-outs, indulgent hot-stone massages/spa days, watch porn and use toys. Really, toy use and reliable multiple orgasms at your fingertips are something every women should experience. Once you have private time connecting with your body you will feel better and more sexually awake- then you can make an effort with your husband, even if you don’t feel like it. You love him and sex is part of a successful marriage.

Yes.

And if it has not been recommended yet, read the book Come as You Are.

You need to learn (or re-learn) to love your self first, including the sensual side of yourself. Self awareness is key (the book explains it all).

And yes to sex-toys; particularly vibrators. But that begs the question:

- how do you buy, you-know-whats, and not get caught? If you dont want to use the section of Amazon called “sexual health” (and that’s understandable), there are options.

Did you know CVS sells a surprising variety of good quality toys? You can even pay in cash in you like.

And vibrators come in so many new types! If you’ve given up on the kind you tied once, 20 years ago, think again.

Any recommendations on toys?

This one is outstanding:

https://www.cvs.com/shop/lelo-sona-cerise-prodid-2810099

But I have never seen it in stock at CVS.


Do not skimp. LELO is the brand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Vaginal Estrogen Cream. I don't understand why this is not prescribed to women who lose their drive after childbirth?

"This medication can make your body retain fluid, making your fingers, hands, or ankles swell. Your blood pressure can go up. "

I already have high blood pressure, and high cholesterol. I take medication for both now. I don't think I want to make it worse and have to take more medication to counteract the cream.

I used to take the pill and it made me retain water. I hated it.

the cream sounds like a nightmare to me.