DS friend lives in dangerous area wwyd?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anacostia? Hell no.

Racist.

. +1. When's the last time you were in Anacostia?

Once and I vowed never again. I was shaking in the car.

Racist

How is it racist to be scared of a town that is notorious for shootings?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anacostia? Hell no.

Racist.

. +1. When's the last time you were in Anacostia?

Once and I vowed never again. I was shaking in the car.

Racist

How is it racist to be scared of a town that is notorious for shootings?

You were “shaking in the car“ because you are afraid of Black people. That’s racist. Did you actually see anything untoward going on?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anacostia? Hell no.

Racist.

. +1. When's the last time you were in Anacostia?

Once and I vowed never again. I was shaking in the car.

Racist

How is it racist to be scared of a town that is notorious for shootings?

You were “shaking in the car“ because you are afraid of Black people. That’s racist. Did you actually see anything untoward going on?

No I am not afraid or black people. I was afraid of getting shot.

Anacostia is considered one of the worst neighborhoods in DC due to high violent and property crime rates. It is a historic neighborhood in southeastern DC with a population of 117,488, but the area is plagued by crime. The crime rate in this neighborhood is sporadic and has fluctuated since the early 2000s. Drug and gang activity is common in Anacostia, especially in the Ward 8 section and the River’s East Bank area. A study done in 2015 found that only 44 percent of inhabitants reported feeling safe walking on the street during daytime hours. Residents say that they don’t feel the police adequately protect them or patrol the area. Exercising caution on public transit and protecting valuable items is advised.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't send your over. Invite the kid (and parent(s)) over to you, or neutral ground, twice as often. Treat your guests well, make it worth their while to commute (great food, gear for their activities, etc)

I'm sure the kid and parent know they are poor and don't love being poor. Let them think you are a priss, but balance that against your generosity and hospitality.

Never criticize their neighborhood. They know their neighborhood better than you do.

And drive their kid home so it’s not always the other parents doing the driving.

That can be iffy too - driving in dangerous neighborhoods. Sorry, I wouldn't do it.

I had a really nice car a long time ago, and got lost in a dangerous neighborhood. So many people came out looking at my car while I was driving around trying to find my way. It was pretty scary.

omg my grandmother is posting from the grave. the same thing happened to her in 1970 when she drove through a "colored" neighborhood.
grow up and get out more.

Look, Im not the Pp. I live in Shaw. Youre burying your head in the sand if you dont acknowledge the everyday danger all around us. There have been more than 300– nearly 400– carjackings in dc since January. There was an strenpted one right at our front gate! I actually ran out and screamed at the guy who was beating the female driver. Thankfully and amazingly, he was unarmed, but he got away before thr cops came.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not going to pretend there’s no where in the US I wouldn’t send my kid. So I’m not going weigh in on whether or not to send your kid.

But if you don’t want to, I would keep it really simple and say you prefer hosting, and be effusive about what a great kid the friend is. And then continue to offer to have him over regularly. At most I’d say its further than you realized. You don’t need to insult them!

This is a great way to handle it. But your son will tell his friend the truth at some point. And the friend will tell his mom. You can’t avoid that.

[Anonymous]

I’m also not in the DC area (sorry!) and have been in this exact situation, but in our case the mom never invited the kids over to her place. We either had the kids meet at the school, at a third party place like Skyzone or at my house. It was just never an issue and honestly I think she strongly preferred it when I hosted because in our neighborhood the kids could safely bike together to a downtown area with a movie theater, ice cream shop, taco place etc.

You don’t need to discuss. Just offer to host or suggest a venue to meet up that might be closer in her direction than yours. Don’t let the location discourage the friendship even if it means you are doing the heavy lifting of hosting - if the kids are connecting and happy, make it happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:God forbid we have any class mixing. If you hate poor people so much, send your kid to private school.

This comment doesn’t seem to make sense - the kids in question are already friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid we have any class mixing. If you hate poor people so much, send your kid to private school.

This comment doesn’t seem to make sense - the kids in question are already friends.

And it’s very possible it is a private school she is talking about!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid we have any class mixing. If you hate poor people so much, send your kid to private school.

This comment doesn’t seem to make sense - the kids in question are already friends.

OP is socially engineering this kid out of her son's life. She's already been incredibly offensive to the mom, do you really think this won't affect the kids' relationship? And that OP's kid won't start looking down on people who don't live in the "right" neighborhoods?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't send your over. Invite the kid (and parent(s)) over to you, or neutral ground, twice as often. Treat your guests well, make it worth their while to commute (great food, gear for their activities, etc)

I'm sure the kid and parent know they are poor and don't love being poor. Let them think you are a priss, but balance that against your generosity and hospitality.

Never criticize their neighborhood. They know their neighborhood better than you do.

And drive their kid home so it’s not always the other parents doing the driving.

That can be iffy too - driving in dangerous neighborhoods. Sorry, I wouldn't do it.

I had a really nice car a long time ago, and got lost in a dangerous neighborhood. So many people came out looking at my car while I was driving around trying to find my way. It was pretty scary.

Lol. Isn’t one of the reasons people buy “really nice cars” is because they want people to look at it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I miss the days when DCUM was for people in the DC area.

OMG, get over yourself.

[Anonymous]

Some of you really live in a bubble, and yet think you are being good people by ignoring the fact that other people do have to live in high crime areas, and insulting others who have legitimate concerns about crime.

OP, your concern is definitely warranted. I grew up in a high crime neighborhood immigrant neighborhood. Gangs were present. We did have to be careful. My mom would have never let me walk home from school alone or play outside without supervision. I agree with others that there is no need to discuss it. Just keep declining and keep inviting your child's friend over to your house or other outings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Anacostia? Hell no.

Racist.

. +1. When's the last time you were in Anacostia?

Once and I vowed never again. I was shaking in the car.

Racist

How is it racist to be scared of a town that is notorious for shootings?

You were “shaking in the car“ because you are afraid of Black people. That’s racist. Did you actually see anything untoward going on?

NP
You only need to be scared if you actually witness violence? You are delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can't imagine any area in the DMV so dangerous that I wouldn't be comfortable with my child being at friend's house, supervised. Unless you're literally in a war zone, what exactly are you worried about? The chances of a stray bullet hitting your child the once a month they visit are vanishingly small, and assuming you are driving him and picking him up, his risk of being injured or killed in a car accident on the way to or from this house is significantly larger. The risk of there being a home invasion when your son is there is also vanishingly small.

It's not unreasonable to ask if there's a gun in the home (and that's not unreasonable to ask anyone who lives anywhere) because that would actually introduce some risk to your son. But that doesn't sound like your concern.

Bottom line, I think you're waaaaaay over reacting.

Ugh, I’m not DC local so I don’t know what to compare it to. It’s listed as one of the top 10 most violent small cities if that helps. I keep telling myself I’m being paranoid for no reason so I agree with you, but my intuition just spikes when I think of leaving him there. I can’t explain it.

You spelled racism wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:God forbid we have any class mixing. If you hate poor people so much, send your kid to private school.

This comment doesn’t seem to make sense - the kids in question are already friends.

And it’s very possible it is a private school she is talking about!

No, she already said that they are very likely using a different address for the kid to be in her son's school. That implies public school, since private schools don't care where you live.

Reading comprehension, honey.