Impressive sounding things about you that aren’t actually impressive

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can fold a fitted sheet.

Haha I love this! I definitely cannot. I’ve tried!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Iowa Writers' Workshop

that is impressive!! why not?

If you’ve ever gone to a reading by the iowa MFA students…you’d know.

[Anonymous]

99th percentile on every standardized test I ever took, 1600 SATs, scholarship student at a top prep school, then double HYPS degrees, lucrative professional career.

I have zero ambition and am exceptionally lazy. I never studied, never worked hard even once. Relatively certain I couldn’t handle any meaningful adversity. Sheer dumb luck that I got handed a mind that made things really easy, and on balance I probably underachieved with it.

I’m impressed by my kid who has to work his butt off to just get by in school. I never could have done that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can fold a fitted sheet.

Humblebrag!

[Anonymous]

I've written the first draft of a novel, 300 or so pages. Whether I'll ever find the time to finish it remains to be seen.

[Anonymous]

I can do a knee hang on a flying trapeze (I used to be able to actually impressive things but pregnancy and kids…)

[Anonymous]

I've sold artwork to major museums. It's not that impressive in my opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:99th percentile on every standardized test I ever took, 1600 SATs, scholarship student at a top prep school, then double HYPS degrees, lucrative professional career.

I have zero ambition and am exceptionally lazy. I never studied, never worked hard even once. Relatively certain I couldn’t handle any meaningful adversity. Sheer dumb luck that I got handed a mind that made things really easy, and on balance I probably underachieved with it.

I’m impressed by my kid who has to work his butt off to just get by in school. I never could have done that.

You probably have ADHD.

[Anonymous]

My byline has appeared in The Washington Post and a dozen other major newspapers. But it wasn’t exactly investigative journalism so much as fluff pieces.

[Anonymous]

I doubled my income in a week (as a teen babysitter)

[Anonymous]

I can run a 19 minute 5K and a 5:30 mile in my 30s

I speak five languages and one of them is a really obscure language

I’m skinny and I eat a lot of pizza and beer

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can fold a fitted sheet.

Me too! I watched a how-to video on it a long time ago and now I’m a pro at it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can run a 19 minute 5K and a 5:30 mile in my 30s

I speak five languages and one of them is a really obscure language

I’m skinny and I eat a lot of pizza and beer

I’m not sure you get the point of this thread.

[Anonymous]

I work for NASA. 12 year old me would be over the moon. Adult me is rueing a passion career choice when tech was obv in reach.

[Anonymous]

I performed (acting) at the National Theater. But it was just one performance for a specific benefit.