Officially done with *preferences* of picky eaters

[Anonymous]

As a foreigner, I find it crazy that there are so many threads on this topic. I have the impression that trendy food restrictions are mostly a US thing? It would be HORRIBLY bad manners in my French family to require food modifications unless for medical reasons. My Godfather is sensitive to chocolate, and we accommodate that otherwise the poor man breaks out in hives right there at the dinner table. My son has anaphylactic nut allergies, so we're very careful with those, which poses problems for French desserts that often have almonds, hazelnuts or pistachios. My daughter needs to take lactase pills. But if it's just a dislike of a food, you grin and bear it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:As a foreigner, I find it crazy that there are so many threads on this topic. I have the impression that trendy food restrictions are mostly a US thing? It would be HORRIBLY bad manners in my French family to require food modifications unless for medical reasons. My Godfather is sensitive to chocolate, and we accommodate that otherwise the poor man breaks out in hives right there at the dinner table. My son has anaphylactic nut allergies, so we're very careful with those, which poses problems for French desserts that often have almonds, hazelnuts or pistachios. My daughter needs to take lactase pills. But if it's just a dislike of a food, you grin and bear it.

We're German. Nobody ever accommodated picky eating in my family either, barring medical issues as you mentioned. I do think it's cultural. My friends in Germany don't generally ask about food restrictions as it doesn't occur to them, but would bend over backwards for allergies etc. Don't like capers? Suck it up if you're an adult or pick around it if you're a kid.

THe level of pickiness here as described by the OP makes me crazy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

I'm vegan but never say it that way because of people like you. Nobody is eating their belt or their shoes--leather is not really part of a discussion regarding food.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

I'm vegan but never say it that way because of people like you. Nobody is eating their belt or their shoes--leather is not really part of a discussion regarding food.

Leather is consuming meat. Just because you’re not ingesting it doesn’t mean you’re not consuming it. If you are going to be vegan, be vegan. Plenty of vegan fake leather goods out there. If you consume animal products, you aren’t really vegan. So good thing you don’t say you are, because you are not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes, this is just a rant. No, I am not talking about food allergies, food restrictions based on religion, actual medical conditions, or even those who choose to be vegetarian or vegan *who take care of themselves and don’t make a scene.*

I’m typically the host of holiday gatherings, even though other family members live local to me. People ask me to host and call to ask “what the plan is” even for holidays I don’t particularly feel like doing the hosting. Easter is coming up, and I’ve agreed to host—for the most part—because my cousin will be home from deployment.

Over the years, picky-eater-creep has been ramping up. First it was accommodating kids, but now those kids are full adults—including the deployed cousin—but the long list of preferences and pickiness hasn’t changed. My dad is included in the picky crowd. As people marry in, the preferences and actual allergies/actual restrictions start to factor in, too.

I’ve decided once and for all that I will ONLY be accommodating real, actual allergies and restrictions. Vegetarians and sometimes-I’m-vegans will have a few options, but I’m not overhauling the whole spread anymore. I finally just decided on a menu, sent it to everyone, and told them if they wanted to bring other dishes, that’s fine. I’m over it with requests to literally not have fruit salad “except for blueberries and strawberries together” from people who recently graduated…from college.

Pickies, time’s up. Pony ride’s over. You’re welcome for carrying you this far.

I think that's your best answer. It's a pain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

The person hosting a holiday meal probably doesn't care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

I'm vegan but never say it that way because of people like you. Nobody is eating their belt or their shoes--leather is not really part of a discussion regarding food.

Leather is consuming meat. Just because you’re not ingesting it doesn’t mean you’re not consuming it. If you are going to be vegan, be vegan. Plenty of vegan fake leather goods out there. If you consume animal products, you aren’t really vegan. So good thing you don’t say you are, because you are not.

Vegan leather is terrible for the environment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

I'm vegan but never say it that way because of people like you. Nobody is eating their belt or their shoes--leather is not really part of a discussion regarding food.

Leather is consuming meat. Just because you’re not ingesting it doesn’t mean you’re not consuming it. If you are going to be vegan, be vegan. Plenty of vegan fake leather goods out there. If you consume animal products, you aren’t really vegan. So good thing you don’t say you are, because you are not.

Leather goods can be more durable than manufactured ones. I think there is room for both as someone is looking for less waste. As with diets, clothing choices are none of my business. And I’m not keeping a tally sheet. “Josh wore a leather cape yesterday- meatloaf it is!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, your plan in fine, great even! I have a couple legit picky friends (one’s a super taster and one has autism related texture stuff) where trying to explain what they can and can’t each is baffling. I love trying to find things they’ll like when it’s just the two of us but it’s impossible if I’m planning a party. Because their good stuff is so weird, they’re used to just not eating at a party if they don’t like anything and eating what they want when they get home. The important part is not to be upset/offended as a host if some folks don’t eat and hopefully they’ll be like my friends and happy they haven’t put you through extra stress.

My DH is a supertaster and there are very few things he won't eat - so it's not all of them that are picky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As a foreigner, I find it crazy that there are so many threads on this topic. I have the impression that trendy food restrictions are mostly a US thing? It would be HORRIBLY bad manners in my French family to require food modifications unless for medical reasons. My Godfather is sensitive to chocolate, and we accommodate that otherwise the poor man breaks out in hives right there at the dinner table. My son has anaphylactic nut allergies, so we're very careful with those, which poses problems for French desserts that often have almonds, hazelnuts or pistachios. My daughter needs to take lactase pills. But if it's just a dislike of a food, you grin and bear it.

We're German. Nobody ever accommodated picky eating in my family either, barring medical issues as you mentioned. I do think it's cultural. My friends in Germany don't generally ask about food restrictions as it doesn't occur to them, but would bend over backwards for allergies etc. Don't like capers? Suck it up if you're an adult or pick around it if you're a kid.

THe level of pickiness here as described by the OP makes me crazy.

Don't German children eat ketchup on pasta?

[Anonymous]

I'll be totally honest. As a very, very good cook who plans her menus and wine pairings, etc. - I don't want guests bringing food unless it is supposed to be a potluck. If you do, you're messing up my spread and my menu. ESPECIALLY don't bring something large that you expect to share with others - if you have an allergy or religious dietary restriction I will cater to it, but it it's about pickiness, if you must, bring a single serving portion of something for yourself. But do not expect your potato salad to be put out on a gorgeously arranged table spread with an Italian feast. Again - total honesty - it isn't about my feelings being hurt that you don't like my food - although for some people it may be. For me it's straight up that I want my I want my guests and myself to experience the evening and curated menu I had planned, not be eating potato salad alongside carbonara.

[Anonymous]

This is such an ego driven post. Not necessarily talking about the guests.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is such an ego driven post. Not necessarily talking about the guests.

Found the person that can't cook and never hosts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

I'm vegan but never say it that way because of people like you. Nobody is eating their belt or their shoes--leather is not really part of a discussion regarding food.

Leather is consuming meat. Just because you’re not ingesting it doesn’t mean you’re not consuming it. If you are going to be vegan, be vegan. Plenty of vegan fake leather goods out there. If you consume animal products, you aren’t really vegan. So good thing you don’t say you are, because you are not.

Vegan leather is terrible for the environment.

I’m not vegan and I do wear leather. But you can’t call yourself a vegan while wearing leather sneakers—you are consuming animal products even if not ingesting them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The people who quietly take care of themselves are not the problem.

Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has a problem with the person who was gluten free but is now keto, and now won't eat grains but at this restaurant will order the salmon.... You know that person.

If you are that person can you please please tell us why?

Wait. Is salmon now made of grain?

You're missing the point. The person changes. They were vegan but now eat salmon, just at this one place. They are all over the place, trendy, and a PITA. Is this you?

Then, they aren't vegan. I've been a vegetarian 25+ years, no meat, chicken, fish, leather, etc. Ever.

I'm vegan but never say it that way because of people like you. Nobody is eating their belt or their shoes--leather is not really part of a discussion regarding food.

Leather is consuming meat. Just because you’re not ingesting it doesn’t mean you’re not consuming it. If you are going to be vegan, be vegan. Plenty of vegan fake leather goods out there. If you consume animal products, you aren’t really vegan. So good thing you don’t say you are, because you are not.

Leather goods can be more durable than manufactured ones. I think there is room for both as someone is looking for less waste. As with diets, clothing choices are none of my business. And I’m not keeping a tally sheet. “Josh wore a leather cape yesterday- meatloaf it is!”

Well of course don’t serve a vegetarian meatloaf; but he’s not vegan. He is vegetarian.