For fun: Let's be the worst Thanksgiving ever

[Anonymous]

Always some drama with my sister who thinks everyone is a problem but herself. In fact, she might even complain that no one told her we are gathering for Thanksgiving. Are you deaf? You hear all the discussions. Does someone even have to tell you directly. If you hear it, ask about it. Then complains about the food when she never contributes to the cooking, preparing ir cleanup.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am your SIL’s feral four year old, screaming at the top of my lungs when I’m excited, unhappy, tired, or told to sit down. Rather than being sent to my room to calm down, I’m going to crawl under the dinner table and bite your leg. While my mom laughs and says I’m playing dinosaur.

Poor kid probably has special needs. Regardless, show some compassion for a 4 year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a pristine kitchen. Out with you philistines. You just ate 7 hours ago and shall not pass my immaculate threshold. There's a gas station down the street. I'm sure they have pop tarts and hot fries and other things peasants like you can eat.

I’ll be on the back porch with a pear and sniffer if Brandy.

NICE.

[Anonymous]

I'm the SIL and BIL who think guests should never have to help cook a meal, set the table, or clean up the dishes and pots and pans afterwards. Even if you're hosting 25 people--not my problem!

[Anonymous]

I am my MIL crying in the kitchen because she's so offended that I ran off to Whole Foods this morning to pick up mushroom gravy and a pie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am my MIL crying in the kitchen because she's so offended that I ran off to Whole Foods this morning to pick up mushroom gravy and a pie.

I am your mother who is bringing a side and arrives two hours late.

[Anonymous]

I'm your eccentric DIL, who is hosting but decided we're honoring Indigenous people, bans anyone from using the word Thanksgiving, and cooks Native American-inspired food like chile-encrusted turkey, oyster stuffing, and turnip casserole.

(yup, that really was me a few years ago LOL)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am your SIL’s feral four year old, screaming at the top of my lungs when I’m excited, unhappy, tired, or told to sit down. Rather than being sent to my room to calm down, I’m going to crawl under the dinner table and bite your leg. While my mom laughs and says I’m playing dinosaur.

Poor kid probably has special needs. Regardless, show some compassion for a 4 year old.

I think you missed the point of the thread.

[Anonymous]

I am a large bottle of Maalox. I will be drained by profusion by 8 p.m.

[Anonymous]

I am your atheist BIL who suggests we go around the table saying whether we have faith or not. And I know some of you are just pretending to be agnostic because you're afraid to take on my devastating arguments, that's the only possible reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's me, covid. Just doing a quick pass through! I'll say hi to everyone real quick and then I have to get along to the next gathering!

Hey there, Covid! It's me, influenza strain A. This is the best Thanksgiving I've had in years!

RSV checking in here. Did you know I’m not just for kids anymore? LOL!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am the “easy” pie you made last night!

Hahaha JK. I was not easy and now I am delightfully ruined. No pie for you!

Sorry, I’m sure this was totally annoying, but your phrasing gave me a much-needed laugh today.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am my MIL's low-cholesterol mashed potatoes. Recipe: Mash potatoes with hot water.

Ewww. It’s like eating them after dinner when you’re soaking the pan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am your SIL’s feral four year old, screaming at the top of my lungs when I’m excited, unhappy, tired, or told to sit down. Rather than being sent to my room to calm down, I’m going to crawl under the dinner table and bite your leg. While my mom laughs and says I’m playing dinosaur.

Poor kid probably has special needs. Regardless, show some compassion for a 4 year old.

Ugh. More ill-behaved kids don’t have special needs than do. Stop making excuses.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's me, covid. Just doing a quick pass through! I'll say hi to everyone real quick and then I have to get along to the next gathering!

Hey there, Covid! It's me, influenza strain A. This is the best Thanksgiving I've had in years!

RSV checking in here. Did you know I’m not just for kids anymore? LOL!

Y’all actually did ruin our thanksgiving. Currently sitting in the hospital with my 9 month old who was RSV. This thread has brought some cheer to my day