Redshirting August boy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: As an employer how on earth can I use school grades as an accurate filter for young employees if they can be gamed so easily. I don’t want dumb rich kids who artificially inflated their grades by placing themselves with younger/weaker classmates.

You can assume that if they are okder thsn they should be for their school year, then they have snowplow parents and you should steer clear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: As an employer how on earth can I use school grades as an accurate filter for young employees if they can be gamed so easily. I don’t want dumb rich kids who artificially inflated their grades by placing themselves with younger/weaker classmates.

As if you’ve ever hired anyone in your life. Ordering your mom to bring you more Doritos is not the same thing as hiring, you know.

I manage a team of 10. And the terrible work ethic of people I have seen come and go is of no surprise when I read the parents attitudes on here. Arriving late, leaving early when there are still tasks outstanding, refusal to do essential but “ boring” parts of the job role … yuck.

You get what you pay for. Pay them more.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: As an employer how on earth can I use school grades as an accurate filter for young employees if they can be gamed so easily. I don’t want dumb rich kids who artificially inflated their grades by placing themselves with younger/weaker classmates.

As if you’ve ever hired anyone in your life. Ordering your mom to bring you more Doritos is not the same thing as hiring, you know.

I manage a team of 10. And the terrible work ethic of people I have seen come and go is of no surprise when I read the parents attitudes on here. Arriving late, leaving early when there are still tasks outstanding, refusal to do essential but “ boring” parts of the job role … yuck.

You get what you pay for. Pay them more.

It’s kind of funny to me that all that PP revealed is what a mediocre boss she is.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.

I am a DP. They also more mature because they are a year older. That’s the whole point.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.

Thousands of kids who have been redshirted and are now successful adults prove you wrong. If this didn't work, nobody would do it. Unfortunately for you, these kids are doing well and turn out just fine. Find a new hobby.

You are deflecting and entirely missing the point. Some will be fine, some will struggle. However, these kids should be provided with supports given their special needs.

DP. That vast majority don’t have special needs so…

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

NP. I feel like if 12 months solves the problem, he can do it at grade level. That makes it so he isn't off grade level the rest of his school career, needlessly, since this sounds like a temporary, 12-month problem. So what if he has a tough K, 1st, or 2nd grade year? At least he is working "up."

I have a September boy (who would be 17 all through his senior year, many years into future). He is in the lowest group in his class for in reading. But he's very smart and competitive, so he's working hard to keep up with kids who are nearly a year, or more than a year (redshirted) ahead of him, and making big gains.

I am very anti-redshirt overall, but I could see myself doing it much later if it makes sense for sports and if he wants it. My child is athletic and will grow up very tall and strong, so an extra year might truly make a difference in physical growth, and depending on the school and cutoffs, he might actually be too young for his grade by high school (if we went private). So, imagining he has potential to be a college athlete, then I'd look at it. But not while he's a little elementary schooler. He deserves to be where school system says he should be, and I can't really think of any circumstance why any child shouldn't be. Their brains are ready, behavior may vary.

The bolded is peak DCUM anti-redshirter. “I know better than the rest of you and if you redshirt you are wrong wrong wrong and I definitely know better what to do with your kids than you do, but if I want to redshirt my kid, it’s a good idea and totally fine and obvs the right thing to do.”

Classic. Yet more good old-fashioned hypocrisy from DCUM anti-redshirters shamelessly displayed for the rest of us to gawk at.

“Redshirting for me but not for thee.”

Typical anti-redshirter.

Except for serious disabilities, there is no good reason to hold back a child. If anything you should send the child so they will be with peers and get the support they need. Ignoring the issue and playing the wait-and-see game is a very dangerous one to play. These kids are losing a year of services and supports especially if parents don't engage the kids in private therapies and supports.

There is zero reason to rush a kid through age-inappropriate school.

I let my kids have an extra year of age-appropriate preschool (Montessori) because that was the best environment for them to learn and grow at that age.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.

Thousands of kids who have been redshirted and are now successful adults prove you wrong. If this didn't work, nobody would do it. Unfortunately for you, these kids are doing well and turn out just fine. Find a new hobby.

You are deflecting and entirely missing the point. Some will be fine, some will struggle. However, these kids should be provided with supports given their special needs.

DP. That vast majority don’t have special needs so…

And let's be honest. Most supports are a joke and don't work anyway, if you can even get the school to provide them. If more time makes a huge difference, it's a no brainer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Redshirting is dumb.

I agree, because the ultimate goal of redshirting is to make sure that your kid is not the youngest in the grade - but that automatically means someone else has to be the youngest. However it seems like redshirting is pretty common and encouraged for private schools so it’s probably fine for OP.

That is not “the ultimate goal”.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.

Thousands of kids who have been redshirted and are now successful adults prove you wrong. If this didn't work, nobody would do it. Unfortunately for you, these kids are doing well and turn out just fine. Find a new hobby.

You are deflecting and entirely missing the point. Some will be fine, some will struggle. However, these kids should be provided with supports given their special needs.

DP. That vast majority don’t have special needs so…

And let's be honest. Most supports are a joke and don't work anyway, if you can even get the school to provide them. If more time makes a huge difference, it's a no brainer.

Even if there is no concern about maturity more time in preschool can be a gift.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Why? Just worry about your own kids.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.

Thousands of kids who have been redshirted and are now successful adults prove you wrong. If this didn't work, nobody would do it. Unfortunately for you, these kids are doing well and turn out just fine. Find a new hobby.

You are deflecting and entirely missing the point. Some will be fine, some will struggle. However, these kids should be provided with supports given their special needs.

DP. That vast majority don’t have special needs so…

And let's be honest. Most supports are a joke and don't work anyway, if you can even get the school to provide them. If more time makes a huge difference, it's a no brainer.

Even if there is no concern about maturity more time in preschool can be a gift.

Agreed. Sometimes a delay is just a delay, with time kids catch up and no additional help or support is needed. Because kids don't all mature and develop at exactly the same rate. It's shocking people refuse to acknowledge basic facts.

[Anonymous]

Yes redshirt in preschool- you can’t repeat K in public school unless there are severe issues.

My July boy went on time. Socially and athletically, he seems a bit behind his peers, but academically he’s ahead. If he was held back he would be bored out of his mind. Where he is, his teacher keeps him engaged and challenged with minor adjustments.

I have friends who held kids the same age and they are also doing well in school and are happy. Perhaps I’ll be jealous when our kids are teens and theirs have that extra year of brain development before college.

Do what’s right for your family for whatever reasons are important to your family - cost of preschool, school calendar logistics, social skills, sports. Don’t worry what other people think. It’s your kid and you know them best.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Why? Just worry about your own kids.

Obviously that is what these parents are doing. Why would parents want kids who are almost a year and a half older in classes with their kids who weren't held back?
For all the parents saying that there would be stricter rules in place about redshirting if it wasn't acceptable.... likewise, there are cut offs for a reason. The private and public schools would change the cut off if the majority of kids weren't developmentally ready at that point.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

Right, which is why it's understandable that someone whose spring/summer birthday child is on track and doesn't need to be held back from kindergarten might have pause when people with April/May/whatever birthdays redshirt their kids

Why? Just worry about your own kids.

Obviously that is what these parents are doing. Why would parents want kids who are almost a year and a half older in classes with their kids who weren't held back?
For all the parents saying that there would be stricter rules in place about redshirting if it wasn't acceptable.... likewise, there are cut offs for a reason. The private and public schools would change the cut off if the majority of kids weren't developmentally ready at that point.

How did we get from summer birthdays to kids "a year and a half older?" You're looking for a problem that doesn't exist. Even if parents could hold a child back with a spring birthday, they overwhelmingly do not. Why even bother bringing it up? The majority of kids are ready, which is why a handful of them redshirt and the vast majority don't. Why does this upset you so much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Depending on the school, you won’t have much of a choice. Many of them redshirt kids back to may for K entry.

So how is this decided? My June boy was not redshirted by the school, but my friend's son was. They are 1 year apart and in the same class. Watching the class engage, I feel like my son is too young for K. He's that one kid who doesn't sit still, doesn't listen the first time, is constantly disturbing other children, making poor choices, etc. Hopefully behaviors really do level out as they age.

He’s a year younger. These are not his true peers. Maybe his last preschool did not prepare him, especially if it was play based.

His entire class isn't one year older. I just know of this one child in particular because I know his mother outside of school. His last wasn't play- based, but it doesn't seem like he was prepared at all which is why I'm so curious how it's decided whether to redshirt or not. For the record, I know my friend had zero plans to redshirt until the school pretty much said you can redshirt or be rejected, choice is yours.

I'd rather be rejected as it's not the right school fit to hold back a child based on its easier for the school vs. putting the time into the child to help them be successful.

Spending an extra year raising them is literally putting in the time.

That's not really how it works. And, if you put the time in early on you probably would not have needed to hold them back. At 18, senior year, anyone who has checked out, isn't going to put effort in when kids are 18/senior year. Be real.

Be real? What? My 18 year old senior crushed it. In academics, sports, socially, everything. Happy kid has had a great freshman year at Princeton so far as well.

And, be real. If you sent him on time, he probably would have crushed it too. But, you choose to infantile him by holding him back. He would have been crushing it as a sophomore where he should be.

You are a fool. You know nothing of my kid, let alone where he stood 13 years ago, family genetics with respect to maturing, etc, etc, etc ad infinitum. You just blather generalities. You have no idea where he should be and you have no idea, really about anything. Typical seldom right but never in doubter.

Right.. anything to justify the situation. Maturing... you didn't even give your kid the chance. I hope you had him in therapy if he was that immature. He needed support not held back.

Oh my God. Are you the same freak show who in a previous thread told me that since my late summer kid was socially and emotionally not ready for kindergarten, I should have put him through a full neuropsych evaluation and gotten him therapy, instead of.. just waiting a year? Despite the fact that just waiting a year got him exactly where he needed to be?

Your passion for pathologizing normal variations in development is truly terrifying.

If your child had social and emotional delays, yes, you should have gotten them help. Maybe you are why they were so delayed.

That’s right, sunshine, he had some kind of delay that was completely remediated by… waiting 12 months.

If waiting 12 months solves the problem without further intervention, I’m completely baffled why you think subjecting a child to extensive testing and therapy is somehow a better solution. Other than, of course, the violation of your invented natural law dictating a 12 month span in the classroom. As if multi-age classrooms haven’t been the practice for the greater part of human history…

It was not waiting 12 month. You put him with younger peers so he’s never had the chance to catch up. You failed him by ignoring it and holding him back. So, what looks to you as maturity is immaturity as he is being compared to with kids a year younger.

Do you even have kids? Young kids mature a TON in 12 months. Even 6 months makes a big difference.

But, they aren't maturing like you are saying. Because, what you are comparing them to are kids a full year younger, not kids their own age or kids older. Yes, 6-12 months makes a big difference but kids will learn more from older kids as the example. If your 5 year old is with 4 year olds, they will seem more mature but they are being held to a 4 year old standard as a 5 year old. So, therefore, they are less mature than the 4 year old if they behave the same way and they are 5.

Thousands of kids who have been redshirted and are now successful adults prove you wrong. If this didn't work, nobody would do it. Unfortunately for you, these kids are doing well and turn out just fine. Find a new hobby.

You are deflecting and entirely missing the point. Some will be fine, some will struggle. However, these kids should be provided with supports given their special needs.

DP. That vast majority don’t have special needs so…

And let's be honest. Most supports are a joke and don't work anyway, if you can even get the school to provide them. If more time makes a huge difference, it's a no brainer.

Even if there is no concern about maturity more time in preschool can be a gift.

Agreed. Sometimes a delay is just a delay, with time kids catch up and no additional help or support is needed. Because kids don't all mature and develop at exactly the same rate. It's shocking people refuse to acknowledge basic facts.

And, did you have a professional decide that or you just held back for your own benefit? I cannot imagine a professional recommending holding back without other supports in place. Your kids aren't more mature when you hold them back. They still have delays. But, you are changing their peer group to a younger group so they appear older and smarter than those kids to you but its artificial given your kids are not with their true peers.