Evan Rachel Wood names her abuser.
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Anonymous
No. I’ve been to pedophile & abuse training for youth. One of the biggest points they drive home is how to sharpen our senses, how to listen to our instincts. Your message seems to be implying to we have no instincts, agency, or ability to develop character discernment. We absolutely do. Young women must listen to them. In these training courses, they talk about grooming. They discuss what type of “asks” are inappropriate, and what type of “asks” should send a shiver down your spine. Many of us know these things intuitively. Many others need to hear it (especially kids). I do not blame Rachel whatsoever. But...let’s encourage our kids to take people for their word. If they appear to be cruel, then don’t enter a relationship or leave it when it becomes apparent. That’s all. And nothing I said is controversial. |
Anonymous
Sure, in an ideal world kids are encouraged to recognized alarm bells and set boundaries and intuitively detect predators and alert responsible adults. But predators often seek out kids who don’t live in that ideal world, they look for kids who seem less protected, more eager to please, and/or neglected emotionally and otherwise. Moreover, predators don’t always appear cruel - that’s very often the essence of grooming (which you’d know if you’ve taken abuse training). So yes, let’s encourage kids to use their instincts and their voice, but just because kids are abused doesn’t mean they failed in some way. Or that they just weren’t paying attention, or “should have known”. That’s what you’re implying and no, that’s not right - it’s absolutely victim blaming. Woods was clearly caught and groomed by a predator. It’s not because she failed in some way. |
Anonymous
| No one said she failed. WE fail kids all. the. time. because “not my business”!!! Hell, it IS our business. |
Anonymous
She was 18 or 19. |
Anonymous
No doubt she had been abused way before. |
Anonymous
You don’t know this and have no business suggesting that. Moreover, not all 18 year olds, especially ones who grow up in an environment like Hollywood where boundary setting, especially for girls and women, isn’t typical, are savvy enough/ mature enough / confident enough to reject the advances of a 30 something man. Again, the insinuation is she should have known better. That’s victim blaming. |
Anonymous
You know you have a real comprehension problem? Reread what I said. |
Anonymous
| Hollywood is a cesspool of sexual abuse. Let’s be honest. |
Anonymous
Reread what you wrote - which was a speculation that ERW had been abused prior to Manson. Reading comprehension and all. |
Anonymous
You either didn't pay attention, twisted it to suit your preset narrative, or need to get your money back. Your lack of understanding how this works is utterly disgusting. |
Anonymous
+1 And then you read more about her life history and find out she was raped by two different men, not including Manson or whatever his name is. She clearly has been through trauma and is even now still making bad choices. Repeated abuse will do that to a person. Her parents obviously failed her. I wonder about the rest of the family. Did no one watch what was happening and try to step in? It is horrible. |
Anonymous
NP. Yeah, the pp is victim blaming. If only sex abuse victims could recognize the signs, listen to themselves, etc then they wouldn't be abused-- that is the definition of victim blaming. Pp, I'm glad you took that training. But people on this thread who are actual victims of abuse have told you that they grew up in situations that distorted their perception of normal so nothing seemed amiss. |
Anonymous
Not the person you're responding to but I don't think you're reading her post correctly. It is because of their abuse that some people who have been abused get stuck in a bad pattern. It is why you see people like Wood who go from bad circumstance to worse circumstance repeatedly. They have learned to accept and even expect the abuse, and they become incapable of reading the signals to keep themselves safe and to make better choices. Some people who have been abused need intensive retraining and therapy to learn how to do things that many of the rest of us do intuitively to keep ourselves safe. That isn't victim blaming, it is recognizing why people like Woods continue to make choices that the rest of us would not make because they seem so unsafe and unhealthy. It sounds like Woods is now finally working with a competent therapist. I hope she sticks with it and I hope that she is able to come to some peace and happiness. |
Anonymous
Yes, I'm glad someone picked up on this... I was not goth, did not listen to Manson, and had no idea about his love life, but I do remember this being the media narrative at the time: it's all for show, it's art. And I think all the blamers are missing the point that it is very VERY unlikely that he approached Evan Rachel Wood by discussing how he liked to kill puppies/hurt partners. Instead it was likely a reiteration of this exact same narrative that was already the prevailing one--I am shy and sensitive and it is an absurd act you are smart enough to see this, save me, etc. The same crap many many much older women have fallen for when they want to rescue a (hopefully much less toxic) loser. |
Anonymous
Completely agree. I also was not goth and didn't listen to his music, but, in case you weren't around back then or are just going by the pictures, this was very much the narrative. The message was that Brian Warner was separate and different from Marilyn Manson, which was just a public persona/character. |