Girlfriend Cheated On Me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I got more information from her. He was a guy she was interested in but it never worked out. They had sex once before we had sex ( we had sex a week later on fifth date) and she said she realized she was more into me and wanted to only date me. It was within the first month and we were not exclusive. I’m going to move forward with her but I’m not proposing when I had planned. I think I’m going to give it more time and see how things go before I make any more decisions about it.

This seems totally normal. She was dating multiple people and chose you. What’s the issue?

I also don't see an issue here. At your age and unmarried woth no kids she was smart to date. You do know that women have a clock. I dated several people when my husband and I first met. I stopped accepting dates with everyone once I met him because I knew he was the one.

[Anonymous]

I’m confused why OP, at the very beginning of the thread, despite having no details, knew that the hookup took place in the first two months and was only once. But it wasn’t until he confronted the GF that he conveniently found out it was at the one month mark before they had sex. So did the friends coworker, upon seeing the photo, say “I hooked up with that woman in approximately September or October of last year”?

It’s weird to have gotten a two month window from the friends coworker.

In short, if the story is actually as GF described, then there is absolutely nothing wrong with it.

But, in light of how it all came up, I wouldn’t believe a word of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I got more information from her. He was a guy she was interested in but it never worked out. They had sex once before we had sex ( we had sex a week later on fifth date) and she said she realized she was more into me and wanted to only date me. It was within the first month and we were not exclusive. I’m going to move forward with her but I’m not proposing when I had planned. I think I’m going to give it more time and see how things go before I make any more decisions about it.

You weren’t exclusive, it sounds like she knew the other guy possibly before you, she didn’t sleep with him after she slept with you (which technically even if she did it wouldn’t have been cheating if you weren’t exclusive), she choose you AND stopped seeing the other guy early on. You had the story confirmations by a friend that she broke it off with the other guy early on and said she was serious about someone else. While it would be lovely if everyone knew after the first date that the wanted to be exclusive, reality is you my not know who you want to date exclusively after the first date and you don’t know who wants to date you exclusively.

She didn’t cheat. She just didn’t feel as strongly about you as you did about her within the first few dates before you decided to be exclusive and while that stings but she got there in a matter of what 2 weeks later and picked you over someone she had been thinking about for awhile. With all the stuff going on in the world, you shouldn’t take love or your time together for granted. Either you want to build a life with her or not.

OP doesn’t deserve her. If they do end up together, he will always throw it in her face what a “whore” she was at the beginning of their relationship. OP, break up with her and let her find someone more mature than you.

Narrator: she is a whore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I got more information from her. He was a guy she was interested in but it never worked out. They had sex once before we had sex ( we had sex a week later on fifth date) and she said she realized she was more into me and wanted to only date me. It was within the first month and we were not exclusive. I’m going to move forward with her but I’m not proposing when I had planned. I think I’m going to give it more time and see how things go before I make any more decisions about it.

Woman here. You are being ridiculous. She slept with him before you? She did not cheat. You are insecure. She chose you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I got more information from her. He was a guy she was interested in but it never worked out. They had sex once before we had sex ( we had sex a week later on fifth date) and she said she realized she was more into me and wanted to only date me. It was within the first month and we were not exclusive. I’m going to move forward with her but I’m not proposing when I had planned. I think I’m going to give it more time and see how things go before I make any more decisions about it.

Woman here. You are being ridiculous. She slept with him before you? She did not cheat. You are insecure. She chose you.

I am a woman as well. OP is wise to reevaluate the situation, and in my opinion, he should move on . No she's spinning it as she chose him because she doesn't want to be alone wants that ring. Dream guy rejected her. How the story came out is fishy as heck. While I agree she didn't cheat no way should OP marry this woman, he is setting himself up for misery once she gets the baby or two, and she realizes she settled to get a ring and kids. He won't move on though, and she won''t either and they will be divorcing in 5-10 years or miserably married and having or contemplating affairs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s doesn’t sound like she even cheated on you. You’re mad that she slept with someone while you two were just dating. If you can’t get over that then you should move on for her sake.

+1 - you can't even remember if you were exclusive or not. I think the fault here is with you and how you view things, but you should break up so your girlfriend won't have to live with your worldview for the rest of her life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I got more information from her. He was a guy she was interested in but it never worked out. They had sex once before we had sex ( we had sex a week later on fifth date) and she said she realized she was more into me and wanted to only date me. It was within the first month and we were not exclusive. I’m going to move forward with her but I’m not proposing when I had planned. I think I’m going to give it more time and see how things go before I make any more decisions about it.

Woman here. You are being ridiculous. She slept with him before you? She did not cheat. You are insecure. She chose you.

I am a woman as well. OP is wise to reevaluate the situation, and in my opinion, he should move on . No she's spinning it as she chose him because she doesn't want to be alone wants that ring. Dream guy rejected her. How the story came out is fishy as heck. While I agree she didn't cheat no way should OP marry this woman, he is setting himself up for misery once she gets the baby or two, and she realizes she settled to get a ring and kids. He won't move on though, and she won''t either and they will be divorcing in 5-10 years or miserably married and having or contemplating affairs.

Before the girlfriend said anything, the OP had already heard that his girlfriend (with whom he wasn’t exclusive at the time) broke it off with the other guy. But if the OP feels the need to put his girlfriend on some sort of probation maybe she didn’t make the right choice in who to continue dating.

Op here. My buddy’s co-worker is the guy. They were hanging out and he saw pics of all of us together and asked who I was. He told my friend that they had a one time thing but she stopped talking to him after she met someone she was serious about. I don’t really know the exact time they slept together but I know it was within the first two months.

[Anonymous]

OP your ego is hurt because you found out she slept with someone else after she met you, but she didn't cheat on you. Part of dating, especially that early on when you haven't even been physical yet is figuring out who you like most. She did exactly that. Leave her or be with her, but to hold it over her head and put her on some kind of probationary period is very immature of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I got more information from her. He was a guy she was interested in but it never worked out. They had sex once before we had sex ( we had sex a week later on fifth date) and she said she realized she was more into me and wanted to only date me. It was within the first month and we were not exclusive. I’m going to move forward with her but I’m not proposing when I had planned. I think I’m going to give it more time and see how things go before I make any more decisions about it.

Woman here. You are being ridiculous. She slept with him before you? She did not cheat. You are insecure. She chose you.

I am a woman as well. OP is wise to reevaluate the situation, and in my opinion, he should move on . No she's spinning it as she chose him because she doesn't want to be alone wants that ring. Dream guy rejected her. How the story came out is fishy as heck. While I agree she didn't cheat no way should OP marry this woman, he is setting himself up for misery once she gets the baby or two, and she realizes she settled to get a ring and kids. He won't move on though, and she won''t either and they will be divorcing in 5-10 years or miserably married and having or contemplating affairs.

MAJOR projecting going on in this post based on NOTHING OP said. Dream guy? She slept with the dude one time. Geez

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP your ego is hurt because you found out she slept with someone else after she met you, but she didn't cheat on you. Part of dating, especially that early on when you haven't even been physical yet is figuring out who you like most. She did exactly that. Leave her or be with her, but to hold it over her head and put her on some kind of probationary period is very immature of you.

Yeah you should have no problem with her having an infinite number of dicks inside her while she's dating you. She's just deciding which dick she likes most.

I agree there should be no "probationary period" though. Kick her to the kerb and find a woman with some integrity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP your ego is hurt because you found out she slept with someone else after she met you, but she didn't cheat on you. Part of dating, especially that early on when you haven't even been physical yet is figuring out who you like most. She did exactly that. Leave her or be with her, but to hold it over her head and put her on some kind of probationary period is very immature of you.

Yeah you should have no problem with her having an infinite number of dicks inside her while she's dating you. She's just deciding which dick she likes most.

I agree there should be no "probationary period" though. Kick her to the kerb and find a woman with some integrity.

Your vulgarity is very unattractive.

My guess is you're sitting in your mommy's basement angry at the world because no woman will have you.

This is why some very insecure men should never know or ask about their GF's history.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP your ego is hurt because you found out she slept with someone else after she met you, but she didn't cheat on you. Part of dating, especially that early on when you haven't even been physical yet is figuring out who you like most. She did exactly that. Leave her or be with her, but to hold it over her head and put her on some kind of probationary period is very immature of you.

Yeah you should have no problem with her having an infinite number of dicks inside her while she's dating you. She's just deciding which dick she likes most.

I agree there should be no "probationary period" though. Kick her to the kerb and find a woman with some integrity.

Well....YES! Duhhh!!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP your ego is hurt because you found out she slept with someone else after she met you, but she didn't cheat on you. Part of dating, especially that early on when you haven't even been physical yet is figuring out who you like most. She did exactly that. Leave her or be with her, but to hold it over her head and put her on some kind of probationary period is very immature of you.

Yeah you should have no problem with her having an infinite number of dicks inside her while she's dating you. She's just deciding which dick she likes most.

I agree there should be no "probationary period" though. Kick her to the kerb and find a woman with some integrity.

Yes, the untouched virgin that assumes the first date, really the first glance that you are exclusive and committed with no words needing to be exchanged. That should solve OP’s problems.

[Anonymous]

You came to the wrong place for advice. By now, without reading this thread, you should have realized that there is no way she is a whore. That said, you should still dump her but only because you do not deserve her.

[Anonymous]

She wasnt your girlfriend yet. You were dating. She did not "cheat".