Sideline Karens

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How does your HUSBANDs bad behaviour turn this into a KAREN situation. It's not a Karen/female thing. It's a male ego (living vicariously) thing!! Sexists for sure.

some of the worst behavior I have seen at games is from egotistical soccer moms. The Karen part of OP’s post refers to someone calling and complaining to the coach/owner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just started travel this year, so maybe my expectations are off. Wanted to get a gut check:

Spouse gets a little enthusiastic on the sidelines. Never calls out any individual player by name (other than our kid), but may call out if the defense or offense is lacking. Nothing mean-spirited, mostly encouragement. Sure, there were also some private parent-to-parent conversations on the sideline that may have been more critical, but nothing loud enough for a player or even another parent in the stands to hear . . . unless they were eavesdropping.

Yesterday, after the tournament weekend, spouse gets a call from the OWNER of the club dressing him down for his sideline behavior. Another parent on the team got the same call. I would have thought adults could have a conversation with each other, or even with the coach, before involving the owner of the entire organization.

IS THIS NORMAL?

No. This is disgraceful. I would immediately remove your kid from the team and find a club that will welcome your family as you deserve. Sideline input from parents is very important for for the growth of the kids - and its especially important that they get feedback from parents who are not their own parents because their own parents tend to have trouble seeing the faults in their own kids' abilities. Wherever you go you should encourage your DH to carry on providing input. Some other parents may initially resist but they will come around as they see their kids improve as a consequence.

Nicely done.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just started travel this year, so maybe my expectations are off. Wanted to get a gut check:

Spouse gets a little enthusiastic on the sidelines. Never calls out any individual player by name (other than our kid), but may call out if the defense or offense is lacking. Nothing mean-spirited, mostly encouragement. Sure, there were also some private parent-to-parent conversations on the sideline that may have been more critical, but nothing loud enough for a player or even another parent in the stands to hear . . . unless they were eavesdropping.

Yesterday, after the tournament weekend, spouse gets a call from the OWNER of the club dressing him down for his sideline behavior. Another parent on the team got the same call. I would have thought adults could have a conversation with each other, or even with the coach, before involving the owner of the entire organization.

IS THIS NORMAL?

No. This is disgraceful. I would immediately remove your kid from the team and find a club that will welcome your family as you deserve. Sideline input from parents is very important for for the growth of the kids - and its especially important that they get feedback from parents who are not their own parents because their own parents tend to have trouble seeing the faults in their own kids' abilities. Wherever you go you should encourage your DH to carry on providing input. Some other parents may initially resist but they will come around as they see their kids improve as a consequence.

Troll and/or idiot.

Different poster but previous was being sarcastic. Good response to a Karen thinking she was being the victim.

OP needs to shut up and just watch them play, reflect on their behavior and understand that they were in the wrong. Wrong enough that someone from the top of the club had to call you.

[Anonymous]

I thought the husband WAS the Karen in this analogy?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just started travel this year, so maybe my expectations are off. Wanted to get a gut check:

Spouse gets a little enthusiastic on the sidelines. Never calls out any individual player by name (other than our kid), but may call out if the defense or offense is lacking. Nothing mean-spirited, mostly encouragement. Sure, there were also some private parent-to-parent conversations on the sideline that may have been more critical, but nothing loud enough for a player or even another parent in the stands to hear . . . unless they were eavesdropping.

Yesterday, after the tournament weekend, spouse gets a call from the OWNER of the club dressing him down for his sideline behavior. Another parent on the team got the same call. I would have thought adults could have a conversation with each other, or even with the coach, before involving the owner of the entire organization.

IS THIS NORMAL?

Answer me this. Is your husband's name Messi, Ronaldo, Pele or Maradona?
If not, maybe he should shut his trap?

[Anonymous]

For the owner to have called, your spouse must really have been a jerk.

[Anonymous]

Sometimes people speak louder than they think. It isn't the same content, but one time I mentioned to my husband that I thought a ref's offsides call was unfair and inconsistent in favor of the other team. I didn't think anyone could hear, but one of the parents of the players on the other team came over and apologized for it afterwards. I felt so awkward because I didn't even care that deeply in the first place.

[Anonymous]

I never call out other kids whatever they did. I would expect other parents not to do it to my kid as well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What clubs are owned by individual people? I never knew this. Thanks.

Almost none in the DC area. They are virtually all not-for-profits around here.

OP’s DH sounds like a toxic idiot, and people who call out that sort of ridiculous behavior are not “Karens”.

Many of the Baltimore clubs are - Celtic, pipeline, etc.

If you want your kid to keep playing soccer, your husband needs to chill. There seems to be a trend of kids quitting around age 12 and parents who are douchebags.

[Anonymous]

We had a top pre-academy kid removed from the club a few years ago because his father couldn't shut up. I am not sure why the kid had to suffer but it was causing serious issues at the games.

[Anonymous]

well, this didnt go as planned did it.


Lesson learned. Tell your spouse to shut up and youll be fine

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just started travel this year, so maybe my expectations are off. Wanted to get a gut check:

Spouse gets a little enthusiastic on the sidelines. Never calls out any individual player by name (other than our kid), but may call out if the defense or offense is lacking. Nothing mean-spirited, mostly encouragement. Sure, there were also some private parent-to-parent conversations on the sideline that may have been more critical, but nothing loud enough for a player or even another parent in the stands to hear . . . unless they were eavesdropping.

Yesterday, after the tournament weekend, spouse gets a call from the OWNER of the club dressing him down for his sideline behavior. Another parent on the team got the same call. I would have thought adults could have a conversation with each other, or even with the coach, before involving the owner of the entire organization.

IS THIS NORMAL?

Answer me this. Is your husband's name Messi, Ronaldo, Pele or Maradona?
If not, maybe he should shut his trap?

Actually even then he should shut his trap. There needs to be one voice coaching - period. Anything else just confuses the kids - especially when they're younger - even if the second voice is knowledgeable.

By the time the kids are teenagers this issue is usually just an annoyance rather than a real problem because the teenagers will ignore parents. They happily discuss and decide amongst themselves whose parents are the biggest idiots

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes people speak louder than they think. It isn't the same content, but one time I mentioned to my husband that I thought a ref's offsides call was unfair and inconsistent in favor of the other team. I didn't think anyone could hear, but one of the parents of the players on the other team came over and apologized for it afterwards. I felt so awkward because I didn't even care that deeply in the first place.

But this is okay. It's not a criticism of the team or players. Lots of parents were upset about a call this weekend and several grumbled loudly but not rudely. It wasn't like they were heckling the ref. It was more like a collective groan.

Very different than having a side conversation with another parent about what some players, presumably not their own, are doing wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sometimes people speak louder than they think. It isn't the same content, but one time I mentioned to my husband that I thought a ref's offsides call was unfair and inconsistent in favor of the other team. I didn't think anyone could hear, but one of the parents of the players on the other team came over and apologized for it afterwards. I felt so awkward because I didn't even care that deeply in the first place.

But this is okay. It's not a criticism of the team or players. Lots of parents were upset about a call this weekend and several grumbled loudly but not rudely. It wasn't like they were heckling the ref. It was more like a collective groan.

Very different than having a side conversation with another parent about what some players, presumably not their own, are doing wrong.

We’ve offered to take up a collection to buy the ref a seeing eye dog- respectfully of course

[Anonymous]

This means your kid isn't that good. You are calling out other kids lacking in some area of play while your kid is lacking. Club owners like teams that win. If your kid was making the team into a winning team then they wouldn't have called you. Get ready for your kid to be cut next year or bumped down to lowest level team.