In-laws driving from FL to RI and INSIST on seeing us on their way

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if your neighbors stopped by and talked in your driveway from 6 feet you would turn them away??? This is your family FFS.

No. It's her husband's family. I think that Op should just hide in a closet until the visit is over.

No, your in-laws are your family. Maybe not as important to OP as her blood relatives family but give me a break with this nonsense. We get that OP doesn't like them, sure, ok whatever. But if they're willing to stay in the driveway or on the porch what's the damage? I am sure if her neighbor or a friend stopped by to chat, she would chat with them. Have some decency OP. They're your childrens' grandparents.

+1

Yes, I know that the IL's are her husband's parents and, therefore, her family, too, but Op seems to think they are not all that important, easily brushed off...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP ignore the PP. You are not awful. This is a pandemic, not “just the flu” like some people like to believe. I like the meeting in the park idea. When one of your family members need to use the bathroom you go home. Your ILs are driving up the coast and have no issues with public bathrooms so no need to worry about that.

Thank you, and I am so tired of people dismissing this pandemic. It's an international crisis that is a killer and people that aren't taking it seriously are making matters worse. I like the park idea, thank you. I especially like the park idea because they can't drink at the park. They are both big drinkers and will want to stay for hours and drink and talk like normal if they come to our house. Everyone knows what happens to one's judgment when they drink. Not only will the 6 feet apart get ignored, but they also will not be wearing face masks, after traveling, staying in hotels, and eating at restaurants.. Sorry not sorry.

World's worst DIL.

Says annoying stupid MIL.

Just chiming in to say I'm a DIL and I think that you are absolutely awful. I mean really bad. Your ILs are making that long trip from FL to RI, have offered to stay in a hotel and come over and visit with you OUTSIDE and that is too much trouble for you.

Sorry OP relatives are clearly exercising a string of bad decisions, and stopping at DIL after virus shopping in the South, and the drinking and HAVING to use the bathroom is just clearly the cherry on top.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So if your neighbors stopped by and talked in your driveway from 6 feet you would turn them away??? This is your family FFS.

No. It's her husband's family. I think that Op should just hide in a closet until the visit is over.

No, your in-laws are your family. Maybe not as important to OP as her blood relatives family but give me a break with this nonsense. We get that OP doesn't like them, sure, ok whatever. But if they're willing to stay in the driveway or on the porch what's the damage? I am sure if her neighbor or a friend stopped by to chat, she would chat with them. Have some decency OP. They're your childrens' grandparents.

+1

Yes, I know that the IL's are her husband's parents and, therefore, her family, too, but Op seems to think they are not all that important, easily brushed off...

Stupid people, related by blood, marriage, or water should be avoided during a pandemic.

[Anonymous]

I’m a MIL and “your house, your kids, your rules”. Your husband’s parents are being pushy jerks. Push back and say absolutely no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP ignore the PP. You are not awful. This is a pandemic, not “just the flu” like some people like to believe. I like the meeting in the park idea. When one of your family members need to use the bathroom you go home. Your ILs are driving up the coast and have no issues with public bathrooms so no need to worry about that.

Thank you, and I am so tired of people dismissing this pandemic. It's an international crisis that is a killer and people that aren't taking it seriously are making matters worse. I like the park idea, thank you. I especially like the park idea because they can't drink at the park. They are both big drinkers and will want to stay for hours and drink and talk like normal if they come to our house. Everyone knows what happens to one's judgment when they drink. Not only will the 6 feet apart get ignored, but they also will not be wearing face masks, after traveling, staying in hotels, and eating at restaurants.. Sorry not sorry.

World's worst DIL.

Says annoying stupid MIL.

Just chiming in to say I'm a DIL and I think that you are absolutely awful. I mean really bad. Your ILs are making that long trip from FL to RI, have offered to stay in a hotel and come over and visit with you OUTSIDE and that is too much trouble for you.

Sorry OP relatives are clearly exercising a string of bad decisions, and stopping at DIL after virus shopping in the South, and the drinking and HAVING to use the bathroom is just clearly the cherry on top.

Holy crap, the world must be so terrifying to you. Your poor children. I seriously feel really bad for them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP ignore the PP. You are not awful. This is a pandemic, not “just the flu” like some people like to believe. I like the meeting in the park idea. When one of your family members need to use the bathroom you go home. Your ILs are driving up the coast and have no issues with public bathrooms so no need to worry about that.

Thank you, and I am so tired of people dismissing this pandemic. It's an international crisis that is a killer and people that aren't taking it seriously are making matters worse. I like the park idea, thank you. I especially like the park idea because they can't drink at the park. They are both big drinkers and will want to stay for hours and drink and talk like normal if they come to our house. Everyone knows what happens to one's judgment when they drink. Not only will the 6 feet apart get ignored, but they also will not be wearing face masks, after traveling, staying in hotels, and eating at restaurants.. Sorry not sorry.

World's worst DIL.

Says annoying stupid MIL.

Nope. I am the DIL and would never treat my fabulous MIL so shabbily.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP ignore the PP. You are not awful. This is a pandemic, not “just the flu” like some people like to believe. I like the meeting in the park idea. When one of your family members need to use the bathroom you go home. Your ILs are driving up the coast and have no issues with public bathrooms so no need to worry about that.

Thank you, and I am so tired of people dismissing this pandemic. It's an international crisis that is a killer and people that aren't taking it seriously are making matters worse. I like the park idea, thank you. I especially like the park idea because they can't drink at the park. They are both big drinkers and will want to stay for hours and drink and talk like normal if they come to our house. Everyone knows what happens to one's judgment when they drink. Not only will the 6 feet apart get ignored, but they also will not be wearing face masks, after traveling, staying in hotels, and eating at restaurants.. Sorry not sorry.

World's worst DIL.

Says annoying stupid MIL.

Just chiming in to say I'm a DIL and I think that you are absolutely awful. I mean really bad. Your ILs are making that long trip from FL to RI, have offered to stay in a hotel and come over and visit with you OUTSIDE and that is too much trouble for you.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what you're struggling with here, OP. You literally hold all the cards. It's your house. Don't let people come over if you don't want to. If they pitch a hissy, that's on them. It's not your job to make sure they never react inappropriately to things, and their feelings aren't yours to manage.

They're trying to hand you a bag of poop. Don't take it.

This. Say it's not safe for them and you don't want to be responsible for them potentially catching COVID from you all. And that you will miss them so much this year.

+1

OP, dont listen to the posts snarking at you to let them visit. You're in the right. All these "just wipe the bathroom after they leave" etc. posters are the types who think it's fine to have people over to visit now. You're not alone in believing visits like this with people who are in the middle of a road trip are not a good idea.

Adults like your in-laws who insist they must enter your house and interact are not going to adhere to any attempt you make at distancing once they get inside the door: "Oh, sorry, I just COULDN'T resist hugging sweet little Billy but ha ha, now it's a done deal, here's a hug for Susie too!" It'll all be a joke to them. No rules apply to grandma and grandpa's hugs--right?

The fact they're doing a road trip that length, through many "reopened" states, is nutty anyway. They'll end up getting back to RI and find out they're infected.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what you're struggling with here, OP. You literally hold all the cards. It's your house. Don't let people come over if you don't want to. If they pitch a hissy, that's on them. It's not your job to make sure they never react inappropriately to things, and their feelings aren't yours to manage.

They're trying to hand you a bag of poop. Don't take it.

This. Say it's not safe for them and you don't want to be responsible for them potentially catching COVID from you all. And that you will miss them so much this year.

+1

OP, dont listen to the posts snarking at you to let them visit. You're in the right. All these "just wipe the bathroom after they leave" etc. posters are the types who think it's fine to have people over to visit now. You're not alone in believing visits like this with people who are in the middle of a road trip are not a good idea.

Adults like your in-laws who insist they must enter your house and interact are not going to adhere to any attempt you make at distancing once they get inside the door: "Oh, sorry, I just COULDN'T resist hugging sweet little Billy but ha ha, now it's a done deal, here's a hug for Susie too!" It'll all be a joke to them. No rules apply to grandma and grandpa's hugs--right?

The fact they're doing a road trip that length, through many "reopened" states, is nutty anyway. They'll end up getting back to RI and find out they're infected.

No, most people here have suggested meeting outdoors or at a park that has its own public restroom OP's in laws can use.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what you're struggling with here, OP. You literally hold all the cards. It's your house. Don't let people come over if you don't want to. If they pitch a hissy, that's on them. It's not your job to make sure they never react inappropriately to things, and their feelings aren't yours to manage.

They're trying to hand you a bag of poop. Don't take it.

This. Say it's not safe for them and you don't want to be responsible for them potentially catching COVID from you all. And that you will miss them so much this year.

+1

OP, dont listen to the posts snarking at you to let them visit. You're in the right. All these "just wipe the bathroom after they leave" etc. posters are the types who think it's fine to have people over to visit now. You're not alone in believing visits like this with people who are in the middle of a road trip are not a good idea.

Adults like your in-laws who insist they must enter your house and interact are not going to adhere to any attempt you make at distancing once they get inside the door: "Oh, sorry, I just COULDN'T resist hugging sweet little Billy but ha ha, now it's a done deal, here's a hug for Susie too!" It'll all be a joke to them. No rules apply to grandma and grandpa's hugs--right?

The fact they're doing a road trip that length, through many "reopened" states, is nutty anyway. They'll end up getting back to RI and find out they're infected.

No, most people here have suggested meeting outdoors or at a park that has its own public restroom OP's in laws can use.

They can suggest that all day long but if these road trippers are as pushy as they sound, they're going to huff and puff and be offended at not being able to go into their son's house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't get what you're struggling with here, OP. You literally hold all the cards. It's your house. Don't let people come over if you don't want to. If they pitch a hissy, that's on them. It's not your job to make sure they never react inappropriately to things, and their feelings aren't yours to manage.

They're trying to hand you a bag of poop. Don't take it.

This. Say it's not safe for them and you don't want to be responsible for them potentially catching COVID from you all. And that you will miss them so much this year.

+1

OP, dont listen to the posts snarking at you to let them visit. You're in the right. All these "just wipe the bathroom after they leave" etc. posters are the types who think it's fine to have people over to visit now. You're not alone in believing visits like this with people who are in the middle of a road trip are not a good idea.

Adults like your in-laws who insist they must enter your house and interact are not going to adhere to any attempt you make at distancing once they get inside the door: "Oh, sorry, I just COULDN'T resist hugging sweet little Billy but ha ha, now it's a done deal, here's a hug for Susie too!" It'll all be a joke to them. No rules apply to grandma and grandpa's hugs--right?

The fact they're doing a road trip that length, through many "reopened" states, is nutty anyway. They'll end up getting back to RI and find out they're infected.

No, most people here have suggested meeting outdoors or at a park that has its own public restroom OP's in laws can use.

They can suggest that all day long but if these road trippers are as pushy as they sound, they're going to huff and puff and be offended at not being able to go into their son's house.

Doubt it. They offered to stay at the hotel and suggested an outdoor venue (deck).

[Anonymous]

Don’t give in.Your are right. They sound very obnoxious for not respecting your rules. I would find a part near their hotel, wear masks and meet them there for a take out lunch. Bring lawn chairs, socially distance, wear masks, no hugs etc. Let them know details before they leave Florida.Tell them you are asking them to respect your wishes and not come by your house.
Don’t listen to all the PP who make light of this very dangerous virus. We must take care of our families. Be strong and do not change your mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't see the issue with them staying at your deck if you maintain six feet distance. They can wear a mask when they come in to use the bathroom. Have them wipe down the bathroom. I would try to find a reasonable solution to this.

Plastic cups and paper plates. Mask for bathroom and personal bottles of sanitizer strict seating limits. My neighbor has folks over and they sit like that in the yard outside she doesn't let anyone in the house, so it is doable!

[Anonymous]

OP, you are going to have to visit or see ILs at some point during this pandemic. A vaccine won't be available for at least another 6 months (and I am being optimistic). You need to start adapting. The risk of transmission is very low if you maintain some distance and wear a mask (except when eating). No physical contact, no shared food. This will be the new normal for a while, so start practicing.

I am going to visit my elderly parent. I in March stayed away during the peak out of an abundance of caution and will return. It is not realistic to expect families to have no contact for months and months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are going to have to visit or see ILs at some point during this pandemic. A vaccine won't be available for at least another 6 months (and I am being optimistic). You need to start adapting. The risk of transmission is very low if you maintain some distance and wear a mask (except when eating). No physical contact, no shared food. This will be the new normal for a while, so start practicing.

I am going to visit my elderly parent. I in March stayed away during the peak out of an abundance of caution and will return. It is not realistic to expect families to have no contact for months and months.

There is a BIG difference here - the ILs will be traveling through many "hot spot" states, stopping at gas stations, eating at restaurants and staying at hotels. If they were self-isolating the way everyone else is, this wouldn't be as big a deal. But they are NOT. This is a ridiculous trip to begin with.