OP has been through the ringer twice. She probably doesn't want a face to face rejection. Text is safer. Not defending her because I agree with you but I understand where she's coming from. |
Life is way too short. I know I made the right decision. Even though we already had a date for tomorrow night, he came to my house tonight, unannounced. He didn't have to do that. We talked for a while on my patio. He asked about my career goals. Things about my life. I know it was in artful the way things unfolded but he doesn't seem at all bothered. I could have been blocked and ghosted. He was so kind to me. Something is happening here. JMO. |
| I would have never shared my feelings after only three weeks, I think he handled it very well. |
| I told DW probably 3 weeks in. I was really love at first site for me. Married 18 years and I still feel the same high that i had when we first met |
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I said it very early, two weeks in. He asked me what I was thinking, and that's what I was thinking!! I then said, I know I'm not supposed to say that.
He hasn't run away yet, thank goodness, but it's only been 3 months. We did know each other for a year before dating. |
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I said it 3 weeks in to dating. However I'd known him casually before then. He said it almost immediately thereafter. Have 2 kids and 10 years of marriage under our belt now.
I think when you're older and not a relationship rookie you can know sooner, be more vulnerable and trusting, and eliminate some uncertainties w/ clear communication. That said, doing it by text and then following up w/ the additional texts feels somewhat cringeworthy and pleading. It would put me off. But I wish you all the best! |
This. |
| I told AP too early & that was 12 years ago..still going strong |
So your other 2 marriages...was "something happening there" too? Just curious if perhaps you should tap the brakes and gather yourself before number 3 or 43. |
First marriage, no feelings like I have for this guy. Ever. Still pretty excited though. I knew we would marry the day I met him. Right person at the right time. We took turns pursuing each other. I have no recollection of how or when I Love You was said. Looking back, it seems we both just made a logical decision to marry. Lasted almost 20 years. I thought logical was the way to go. NOT. Second marriage, he told me he loved me after 2 weeks and I said it back and meant it. Every day with him was like Thanksgiving, July 4th and Christmas all rolled into one. It was then I realized that my first marriage was a mistake for me AND him. This one, he could have been a quadriplegic and I would have taken care of him gladly and never looked at another man. Ever. He never felt remotely how I felt and is a long, sad story. Anyway, this new guy, I think he knows how to handle things. He will tap the brakes for me. He is plenty interested and not upset at all. |
| You have the ability to love, OP. That says a lot about you! You have enough experience yet it didn't make you cynical. Your heart is open and that's just who you are. You made it clear in this thread that you knew it might be a deal breaker and you seem ok with it. That he showed up unannounced proves that with age, comes wisdom. Was perfect. Let him lead for a while. Breathe and be happy for the moment or forever! |
Home Depot makes a lot of sense actually. If doesn’t make you spend time with someone there, I don’t know what else will. Hehehe |
| Said it after two months, been together 9 years married for 3. |