Anybody said I love you very early...what happened after

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Three weeks in. I don't regret it. I knew I wouldn't hear it back and could possibly end everything. He feels like HOME. This was done over text. His response was: It's nice to be loved. Hold on to that feeling. I said: you hold on and he said he will. I asked if everything I felt was only on my side and he said no. He asked me to call him the next day (today) and said Nite Sweetie. Anybody ever done this and what happened? I am relieved I got this out of the way.

Did you know him from before or you guys just met?
I think it's slightly different is you knew him from before. You had a crush on him and lalala. And now you guys are trying to see what happens.

If you just met him… DANG! Three weeks?
Anyhow, I wish you guys the best!

Just met. I know, DANG! I've never told anyone this first. Because of our interactions together, I needed to know if love is so very scary to him. If it is so scary, I would rather cut my losses now.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I put my cards on the table. I gave him all the information I have. I don't play games. If he freaks out, so be it.

[Anonymous]

I married him and seven years later we were divorced. I’ve since learned that he tells every woman he loves her within the first two weeks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I married him and seven years later we were divorced. I’ve since learned that he tells every woman he loves her within the first two weeks.

OP here. Been in your shoes. Difference being, us and them, is that I loved him very quickly also and my love was real. Talking about the ex here. Did you feel love for him very fast? I did and it was very real. Not real for him, but real for me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I put my cards on the table. I gave him all the information I have. I don't play games. If he freaks out, so be it.

You could have done the exact same thing in a less dramatic and boundary-crossing way. What's wrong with just saying "I really like you a lot, this feels special"? saying "I love you" after three weeks makes you look unstable and puts him in an awkward position. Ironically you're clearly the one playing the game, but you don't have the psychological insight to realize this.

And I hope to god you understand that actual love and 3-week infatuation are two totally different things. That's not to say an infatuation can't lead to love, or that relationships can't progress quickly, but it's not some kind of impartial "information" that came down to you on high about LOVE.

[Anonymous]

It was so long ago I can't remember! We've been married 37 years and happily still say it almost every day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I put my cards on the table. I gave him all the information I have. I don't play games. If he freaks out, so be it.

You could have done the exact same thing in a less dramatic and boundary-crossing way. What's wrong with just saying "I really like you a lot, this feels special"? saying "I love you" after three weeks makes you look unstable and puts him in an awkward position. Ironically you're clearly the one playing the game, but you don't have the psychological insight to realize this.

And I hope to god you understand that actual love and 3-week infatuation are two totally different things. That's not to say an infatuation can't lead to love, or that relationships can't progress quickly, but it's not some kind of impartial "information" that came down to you on high about LOVE.

OP here. Totally agree.

[Anonymous]

... we got married!

I’m pregnant with our 3rd and my second is throwing a tantrum in the living room. Perfection it is not.

[Anonymous]

I’d ghost you.

Clingy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I put my cards on the table. I gave him all the information I have. I don't play games. If he freaks out, so be it.

But you do behave like a child, as proven by the fact you texted this to him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I put my cards on the table. I gave him all the information I have. I don't play games. If he freaks out, so be it.

But you do behave like a child, as proven by the fact you texted this to him.

They always come back.

[Anonymous]

Have you heard from him after you said I love you? I agree with the other poster If you feel that good about him (which is amazing!) I’d have just said I like you a lot.
Just curious, how old are you Op?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you heard from him after you said I love you? I agree with the other poster If you feel that good about him (which is amazing!) I’d have just said I like you a lot.
Just curious, how old are you Op?

Yes. Tonight. Called me. Told me about his job interview. Going out for pizza in a couple days. I am 54 and he is 62.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you heard from him after you said I love you? I agree with the other poster If you feel that good about him (which is amazing!) I’d have just said I like you a lot.
Just curious, how old are you Op?

Yes. Tonight. Called me. Told me about his job interview. Going out for pizza in a couple days. I am 54 and he is 62.

Oh my gosh, I was guessing 30 years younger! Have you been married/in love before?

I said it around 3 weeks in. I was also 19 and drunk. He said “thank you”. Proposed 15 months later, married a year after that. Now been married for 11+ years.

He’s awesome. Still probably should have kept my mouth shut a while longer

[Anonymous]

It’s a risk because he might be s great guy who is totally capable if a lasting commitment, but too much too soon might cause him to retreat or feel a red flag alert. And that would t reflect on him negatively at all — it would just mean it’s too much too soon for him.

So putting your cards on the table is fine, but if he doesn’t respond as you would like it doesn’t mean he’s not capable of love. That’s the risk you took; there’s nothing wrong with putting your cards on the table but it’s very soon.

All that being said, maybe your interactions have been very special and it sounds like he’s right there with you. Life is short. I hope it works out for you!!