Would you let someone homophobic instruct your child?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I judge people by their behavior, not their FB posts.

Uh, posting on FB is behavior. Or do you think he's posting on FB while taking Ambien and has no idea he's even doing it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This world that we live in is so sad. People can no longer have a difference in opinion and co-exist. I may not agree with your lifestyle, but I would have the upmost respect for you and not treat you any differently because of your choices. That goes for anyone.

This is not a difference of opinion. If you believe homosexual parenting harms children, then we don’t have a difference in opinion, we have a fundamental difference in morality and I think you are a bigot. Bigots don’t get my discretionary income.

That is absolutely a difference in opinion. I may believe that a white couple adopting Asian children isn't fully in the children's best interest and I may have real reasons to support that. I may believe it's best for Asian families to adopt Asian babies. Of course, adoption into any happy, healthy family is better than an orphanage, but am I a bigot because I have that opinion/preference?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This world that we live in is so sad. People can no longer have a difference in opinion and co-exist. I may not agree with your lifestyle, but I would have the upmost respect for you and not treat you any differently because of your choices. That goes for anyone.

This is not a difference of opinion. If you believe homosexual parenting harms children, then we don’t have a difference in opinion, we have a fundamental difference in morality and I think you are a bigot. Bigots don’t get my discretionary income.

That is absolutely a difference in opinion. I may believe that a white couple adopting Asian children isn't fully in the children's best interest and I may have real reasons to support that. I may believe it's best for Asian families to adopt Asian babies. Of course, adoption into any happy, healthy family is better than an orphanage, but am I a bigot because I have that opinion/preference?

A bigot is someone who is intolerant toward people who have different opinions. Intolerance is not the same as disagreeing.

[Anonymous]

What are the odds a homophobic parent who happened to see her kid's karate instructor's same sex wedding post on FB would keep the kid in the karate class?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This world that we live in is so sad. People can no longer have a difference in opinion and co-exist. I may not agree with your lifestyle, but I would have the upmost respect for you and not treat you any differently because of your choices. That goes for anyone.

This is not a difference of opinion. If you believe homosexual parenting harms children, then we don’t have a difference in opinion, we have a fundamental difference in morality and I think you are a bigot. Bigots don’t get my discretionary income.

That is absolutely a difference in opinion. I may believe that a white couple adopting Asian children isn't fully in the children's best interest and I may have real reasons to support that. I may believe it's best for Asian families to adopt Asian babies. Of course, adoption into any happy, healthy family is better than an orphanage, but am I a bigot because I have that opinion/preference?

If you were ranting on a public facebook page about how interracial adoption is evil, I might not want my Asian child adopted into a white family to be in your extracurricular class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In case he’s instructing martial arts. I don’t see how child rearing would be discussed.

I’m Christian and believe what the Bible says. Homosexuality is a sin. If my instructor was gay, I wouldn’t necessarily leave the class because if above. Especially if my child loved the instructor and was thriving. I can’t control others or do i want to. It’s a free country to believe what you want. Thank the Lord. Now if this persona was the human sexuality teacher in 7th grade, then yes.

Like someone said above, it’s a fine line. If he’s polite keeps his private beliefs private. Unfortunately some people haven’t learned Facebook is not private, then I would let it go. He’s not advertising it, you searched like you wanted to find something.

Would you send your child to a class where the instructor posted material on a public facebook page mocking and denigrating Christians and the Bible?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This world that we live in is so sad. People can no longer have a difference in opinion and co-exist. I may not agree with your lifestyle, but I would have the upmost respect for you and not treat you any differently because of your choices. That goes for anyone.

This is not a difference of opinion. If you believe homosexual parenting harms children, then we don’t have a difference in opinion, we have a fundamental difference in morality and I think you are a bigot. Bigots don’t get my discretionary income.

That is absolutely a difference in opinion. I may believe that a white couple adopting Asian children isn't fully in the children's best interest and I may have real reasons to support that. I may believe it's best for Asian families to adopt Asian babies. Of course, adoption into any happy, healthy family is better than an orphanage, but am I a bigot because I have that opinion/preference?

If you were ranting on a public facebook page about how interracial adoption is evil, I might not want my Asian child adopted into a white family to be in your extracurricular class.

But that would still be a “difference of opinion.” It would also be your “opinion” that I am a bigot, but I might also think the same of you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This world that we live in is so sad. People can no longer have a difference in opinion and co-exist. I may not agree with your lifestyle, but I would have the upmost respect for you and not treat you any differently because of your choices. That goes for anyone.

This is not a difference of opinion. If you believe homosexual parenting harms children, then we don’t have a difference in opinion, we have a fundamental difference in morality and I think you are a bigot. Bigots don’t get my discretionary income.

That is absolutely a difference in opinion. I may believe that a white couple adopting Asian children isn't fully in the children's best interest and I may have real reasons to support that. I may believe it's best for Asian families to adopt Asian babies. Of course, adoption into any happy, healthy family is better than an orphanage, but am I a bigot because I have that opinion/preference?

If you were ranting on a public facebook page about how interracial adoption is evil, I might not want my Asian child adopted into a white family to be in your extracurricular class.

But that would still be a “difference of opinion.” It would also be your “opinion” that I am a bigot, but I might also think the same of you.

DP, you are definitely a bigot. You just cover it with "concern" for the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This world that we live in is so sad. People can no longer have a difference in opinion and co-exist. I may not agree with your lifestyle, but I would have the upmost respect for you and not treat you any differently because of your choices. That goes for anyone.

This is not a difference of opinion. If you believe homosexual parenting harms children, then we don’t have a difference in opinion, we have a fundamental difference in morality and I think you are a bigot. Bigots don’t get my discretionary income.

That is absolutely a difference in opinion. I may believe that a white couple adopting Asian children isn't fully in the children's best interest and I may have real reasons to support that. I may believe it's best for Asian families to adopt Asian babies. Of course, adoption into any happy, healthy family is better than an orphanage, but am I a bigot because I have that opinion/preference?

A bigot is someone who is intolerant toward people who have different opinions. Intolerance is not the same as disagreeing.

No, you don't know what a bigot is. It is intolerance towards others who differ. Let Houghton Mifflin enlighten you. The coach is definitely a bigot.
http://definition.org/define/bigot/

One who is strongly partial to one's own group, religion, race, or politics and is intolerant of those who differ. (noun)
A person who is intolerant of any ideas other than his or her own, esp on religion, politics, or race (noun)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I judge people by their behavior, not their FB posts.

Posting hate on Facebook IS a behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I judge people by their behavior, not their FB posts.

Posting hate on Facebook IS a behavior.

+1 And since there's no way to truly erase our digital footprint, in some ways it may be our most lasting behaviors.

[Anonymous]

No way would I send my kid, and I'm not gay. Just as I wouldn't send my non-white child to someone who posted white supremacy propaganda on his Facebook. Discriminatory behavior, and lack of judgement in posting his hateful thoughts.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

PP Forgot to add I don't agree with the instructor but, I do question gay men especially who go to great lengths to have biological children. It seems cruel to cut children out of their mother's lives. To me, it is the modern version of A Handmaid's tale. I read one gay dads induced the birth mother unnecessarily because they didn't want to wait any longer. Could have been harmful to baby and mother but, they didn't care.

Meanwhile, millions of women demand full custody and do their utmost to cut the children out of their ex-husband's lives... but that's not "cruel" because reasons.

Dads are important too. Don't know where you got the idea I thought differently. However, since women give birth I think you know there is a biological edge. I don't think couples should use women from poorer countriest to carry their babies either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

PP Forgot to add I don't agree with the instructor but, I do question gay men especially who go to great lengths to have biological children. It seems cruel to cut children out of their mother's lives. To me, it is the modern version of A Handmaid's tale. I read one gay dads induced the birth mother unnecessarily because they didn't want to wait any longer. Could have been harmful to baby and mother but, they didn't care.

Meanwhile, millions of women demand full custody and do their utmost to cut the children out of their ex-husband's lives... but that's not "cruel" because reasons.

Dads are important too. Don't know where you got the idea I thought differently. However, since women give birth I think you know there is a biological edge. I don't think couples should use women from poorer countriest to carry their babies either.

No one said dads weren't important. But there are many ways to make a family, and two loving moms are not "harmful" to the child as the coach post. I would not allow my kid to return to that person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We are a happily married 2 Mom family with an adopted DD who is now 7.
DD does a martial art and I just found the facebook page of one of the instructors ( He did not friend me on fb) and there are some ignorant and hateful posts on his wall that can be seen by anyone. Most recent was a few days ago when he posted from a site that says "Sociologists say homosexual parenting harms children"

He has always been polite to me and I have not noticed any overt behavior that is different towards my child. But, I am concerned she could potentially be held back by his beliefs and it just really bothers me that he is even around my child.
Would you do or say anything?

Op I wouldn't do anything or say anything unless he directly said something to you or your daughter that is homophobic. I think it is a fine line and while I don't agree with his viewpoint he is allowed to express his opinion. What if the instructor was gay and someone pulled their kids out of the class because they didn't like the gay pride stuff they posted? You would be horrified no?

Plus, you would be only harming your child since she enjoys the activity.

OMFG. Someone pulling their kids out because they are prejudiced themselves against the pride-supporting instructor is not the same as pulling the kid out because the instructor is intolerant.

It is the same. Op never said the person did anything to her or her daughter. People can have different opinions. Even some gay people don't think that gays should be parents ( Dolce and Gabbana for one) There was a big disagreement between them and Elton John. At least this instructor didn't do anything personally to them.

I have a ripped from real life example of why a homophobic instructor is troubling even if they have not yet said something to the child. My 8 year old was at camp this summer and said to one of her counselors "did you know something about me, I have two moms" and the counselor thankfully said something like "that's cool!" For an extracurricular activity, I don't want to put my kid in the position of potentially having her family denigrated, if I already know in advance about the person's beliefs. With a classroom teacher, it's a little trickier and I would make an appointment and have a conversation about what they would say/not say. You could just have a conversation with the instructor, but that takes a lot of emotional energy.

That is the exact opposite of a troubling example.

Yes, it was an example that turned out really well-and I was really thankful for the counselor's response. I was thinking that people would infer from that example, that if OP's child said something similar to the instructor, the kid might get a very different response that could feel really hurtful or scary. As an adult, I have people I just don't talk about certain topics with because we agree to disagree. But, I wouldn't expect my kid to not talk about her life.

So you think if your child said that to a "homophobic" counselor, they would have said "your mom's are going to hell" or something? What if they just said something neutral like "Wow, I didn't know that about you. Thanks for sharing. Hey! It's time for open swim, let's go to the pool!"