Teenage girls not wearing bras

[Anonymous]

There is this adolescent notion kicking around lately that nobody can tell you what to do with your own body. Yes, this is true. But what you wear has consequences. People do not treat you as well if you dress slovenly, provocatively, etc. Feel free to wear whatever you want but own the consequences. Jiggling breasts and pointy nipples will attract negative attention, not just from pervs but from normal people who aren’t used to seeing it in our culture.

[Anonymous]

Okay, so I’m a misogynist/creep/lunatic for telling my DD that her breasts are showing when she bends down, and asking her to put on a bra??? You people are f-ing crazy!! Why does it have to be such an all or nothing issue?? As a parent I have the right to say, “your ti**s are showing, get back in the house and change your shirt” without being labeled an anti-feminist. I’m as liberal as they come but bristle at black and white, knee-jerk reactions at either end of the spectrum.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay, so I’m a misogynist/creep/lunatic for telling my DD that her breasts are showing when she bends down, and asking her to put on a bra??? You people are f-ing crazy!! Why does it have to be such an all or nothing issue?? As a parent I have the right to say, “your ti**s are showing, get back in the house and change your shirt” without being labeled an anti-feminist. I’m as liberal as they come but bristle at black and white, knee-jerk reactions at either end of the spectrum.

How does wearing a bra keep your tits from showing when you bend down? Isn’t that a shirt/dress issue as opposed to a bra issue? The only thing that entirely covers my boobs is my best awesome sports bra.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was a teen (back in the 80s), I was very flat-chested and wore little camis and sundresses all the time without a bra. I'm now a middle-aged mom and have filled out somewhat since then but can't imagine going braless as I used to. I mean, even though I was flat-chested, I'm sure my nipples were glaringly obvious. I wish in retrospect that someone had told me to put on a bra.

Why? Have you noticed or experienced any ill effects from your teenage bralessness?

[Anonymous]

I wish I could go braless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Some of the girls in one of ds's classes were discussing not wearing bras.

He wondered if the guys could discuss not wearing underwear without repercussion.

Anyway, yes OP it's a thing. Probably not the nest thing to discuss in class though.

Does your son actually want to go without underwear, or is a trumped-up grievance to attack women?

you have issues.

Specifically he was wondering if the guys could discuss ball sweat without getting into trouble. (Not likely at his school) The girls were mentioning boob sweat.... no problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay, so I’m a misogynist/creep/lunatic for telling my DD that her breasts are showing when she bends down, and asking her to put on a bra??? You people are f-ing crazy!! Why does it have to be such an all or nothing issue?? As a parent I have the right to say, “your ti**s are showing, get back in the house and change your shirt” without being labeled an anti-feminist. I’m as liberal as they come but bristle at black and white, knee-jerk reactions at either end of the spectrum.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, so I’m a misogynist/creep/lunatic for telling my DD that her breasts are showing when she bends down, and asking her to put on a bra??? You people are f-ing crazy!! Why does it have to be such an all or nothing issue?? As a parent I have the right to say, “your ti**s are showing, get back in the house and change your shirt” without being labeled an anti-feminist. I’m as liberal as they come but bristle at black and white, knee-jerk reactions at either end of the spectrum.

How does wearing a bra keep your tits from showing when you bend down? Isn’t that a shirt/dress issue as opposed to a bra issue? The only thing that entirely covers my boobs is my best awesome sports bra.

DP, but could you possibly be any more deliberately obtuse?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When I was a teen (back in the 80s), I was very flat-chested and wore little camis and sundresses all the time without a bra. I'm now a middle-aged mom and have filled out somewhat since then but can't imagine going braless as I used to. I mean, even though I was flat-chested, I'm sure my nipples were glaringly obvious. I wish in retrospect that someone had told me to put on a bra.

Why? Have you noticed or experienced any ill effects from your teenage bralessness?

Just the retroactive mortification of knowing that my breasts, small as they were, were actually in full view at the time, even though I was convinced they were not. That obviously wouldn't embarrass you, but I cringe when I think back on my cluelessness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It used to be expected that a woman would wear pantyhose, a hat and gloves. Bras are no different. I wear tight fitting spandex camisoles instead of bras often and I'm 48. And NOT small chested.
Deal with it.

That sounds even more uncomfortable than a bra.

I am not that poster but I wear a 34F to give you an idea. I have one of these camisoles pp is talking about and it feel so much better than a bra. I am going to order more of them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Okay, so I’m a misogynist/creep/lunatic for telling my DD that her breasts are showing when she bends down, and asking her to put on a bra??? You people are f-ing crazy!! Why does it have to be such an all or nothing issue?? As a parent I have the right to say, “your ti**s are showing, get back in the house and change your shirt” without being labeled an anti-feminist. I’m as liberal as they come but bristle at black and white, knee-jerk reactions at either end of the spectrum.

No you are completely normal and reasoned, and I wish more people were!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You apparently have never worn a hot, uncomfortable bra, all day, every day. I’m glad teenage girls are taking a stand over what is actually practical and comfortable.

OP here - I’m a woman, been wearing bras for 20+ years and I’ve managed to find comfortable ones. And before I get bashed - I get it, we’re all in agreement here that girls should be able to wear what they want without fear or shame, but I think we need to rein it in a bit. I have boobs, and before I nursed 2 kids, I had GREAT boobs. I wore little bathing suit tops and low cut shirts, as well as short skirts and low cut jeans that showed my nice teenage toned abs. I also then breastfed without shame and my 2 sons know about respecting a woman’s body and that breasts aren’t something to oogle.

Now that that’s out of the way...

We’re on a family vacation and my 16 year old niece went for a family bike ride with no bra on under her white tank top. Then she was wearing a very loose dress with no bra and every time she bent over it was wide open. Look, I get it - it’s nice to feel comfortable, but it’s inappropriate. My father-in-law is in no, way, shape, or form “leering” at his granddaughter, it’s making him uncomfortable seeing her breasts. Her mom and dad are divorced, so her mother isn’t here and my brother-in-law is avoiding talking to her about it. I was talking to her and she mentioned she sometimes doesn’t wear a bra because she “doesn’t need to and you can’t even tell” but I let her know that I could tell and that dress needed something under it. She was fine with it, no argument ensued. But I still just don’t get it...

It's not your niece's job to make men (or anyone for that matter) comfortable. She should be able to dress in whatever way makes HER comfortable and feel good. Your FIL and the rest of your family need to get over your body shame. She's not a baby anymore. She's a woman, so yes she has breasts. Just like she has arms, legs, hands, etc. Just like everyone else. It's only a big deal because you're making it one and you should be ashamed of yourself for perpetuating this misogyny and body shame.

OMG. How much more absurd can you get?
-DP

+1 Just another example that there are people from all kinds of backgrounds posting here!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, so I’m a misogynist/creep/lunatic for telling my DD that her breasts are showing when she bends down, and asking her to put on a bra??? You people are f-ing crazy!! Why does it have to be such an all or nothing issue?? As a parent I have the right to say, “your ti**s are showing, get back in the house and change your shirt” without being labeled an anti-feminist. I’m as liberal as they come but bristle at black and white, knee-jerk reactions at either end of the spectrum.

No you are completely normal and reasoned, and I wish more people were!

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Among teenage girls now, there is a much greater sense than when I grew up that no one has a right to ask them to dress in any particular way. There is much greater awareness about the sexism inherent in dress codes and a rejection of social norms that force them to do things to control their sexuality or their looks to be attractive. IME, girls today are simply dressing to make themselves comfortable and to amuse themselves. As a feminist, I support it. WTF cares if a girl is wearing a bra? If some third party thinks it's "distracting" then that 3rd party needs to get over themselves and get a grip on their thoughts.

What do you mean by a “third party?” Wouldn’t it be the second party?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There is this adolescent notion kicking around lately that nobody can tell you what to do with your own body. Yes, this is true. But what you wear has consequences. People do not treat you as well if you dress slovenly, provocatively, etc. Feel free to wear whatever you want but own the consequences. Jiggling breasts and pointy nipples will attract negative attention, not just from pervs but from normal people who aren’t used to seeing it in our culture.

+1