Punishment: No Christmas?

[Anonymous]

What does Christmas have to do with her grades?

[Anonymous]

I would offer to go to school with her for a day and help her keep track of the time. Be willing to follow through. Bet it would solve the problem in a hot minute.

[Anonymous]

2018 thread

[Anonymous]

Don’t deny all gifts for Christmas.

[Anonymous]

This is sad.

You’ve taken away her social activities and youve taken away electronics. That means the only means for her to connect to her friends is during lunch and in the hall before class. The more you take away, the more valuable these brief periods of human interaction will become.

The punishments aren’t working. Doubling down and canceling Christmas isn’t going to work either. If she’s not already depressed, she will be.

Try talking to her.

Talk about her future and college and what she wants from her life. You need to simplify your household and declutter to create spaces conducive to studying. This is the time to make doctors appointments too. A diagnosis can be useful and therapists can help with strategies.

Make an appointment with the school counselor to talk about viable options for her and how can reach those goals. It doesn’t sound like the traditional college route is going to work for her.

Require that she exercise.

Just about anything is better than canceling Christmas.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This generation of children suck, because parents lack the strong bone house hold. Every parent is judged for there parenting by other parents or even worse non parenting adults. If you think that some way through to your child is discipline and no christmas then do it. I would take the kid shopping have her pick out all the things she ever wanted and take her straight to the donation center or orphanage and drop it off to the kids without a christmas no matter how good they are there is no christmas.

Is this the same poster from the Family Relationships forum prattling about mean children who are estranged from their parents, bumping a 5 year old thread?

The bumper is clearly a genius at understanding a situation. No wonder the proposed course of action is such a winner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't do this. It is extreme and will back fire on you.

This.

Second the screening for ADD, sounds like time blindness.

Have you tried brainstorming with her, an alarm on her phone or Apple watch, etc.?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Too big in my opinion but my kids are younger. Have you had her screened for ADHD? Doesn't sound like she is a bad kid. She is just losing track of time.

And drug use.

[Anonymous]

Won’t work.

Her counseling.

[Anonymous]

If the OP is still around I'd be interested in the post mortem. How is the DD doing 5 years later? Did she go to college?

[Anonymous]

My child who is constantly missing parts of class has anxiety and is their way of coping with the stress. I think this may be out of her control.

[Anonymous]

i wish someone had pointed out this is a 5 year old thread a few more times

[Anonymous]

I would heavily monitor things and reach out to the teachers. Don’t take away Christmas. Everything else yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That won't solve the issue and it will just strain your relationship. I agree that it's likely an executive functioning issue; try to help her instead of punishing her.

+1 this is parenting 101. The punishment should match the crime. In this case, the true crime is that she’s made it this far without getting any support for executive functioning. This is not her fault. I can’t imagine taking away Christmas from my child/teen, for any reason at all much less for the issues you describe.

[Anonymous]

Why do people respond to years-old posts, especially on timely issues like this? This girl is probably well into college by now, if not done.

Although I would be curious to hear from OP what the ultimate outcome was.