Preschooler didn’t not get to go outside for recess

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If it was a licensed child care center in DC, taking away recess is not an allowed punishment.

It actually is allowed if recess itself is the problem. This was a “you screamed in class, that’s a black mark ergo no recess” punishment; it was a “you can’t safely have recess, so we had to take it away” consequence.

Imagine two boys in a fiat fight at the beginning of recess that other kids are getting drawn into. You really think a school can’t take the offenders inside for the duration of recess because that’s taking away recess as a punishment? Wrong. Reaction for safety. Same hung here.

I agree with you. But let's say it was a fist fight or something unrelated to recess. Would it really be a prohibited (presumably by regulation) punishment? Based on what?

I get that it is a bad idea and not developmentally appropriate, but that is different than actually prohibited.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm not going to pile on because I had a child who did stuff like this. He used to refuse to walk back from the park and I would get furious calls from the director telling me that I had to do something about it. We took it as a sign that it was just a bad fit and moved him.

I can't tell you that this move was the happy ending; we didn't choose all that well and pulled him from the new place after just a few weeks. We wound up keeping him home with a nanny for about 6 months until he started kindergarten. I worried a lot but he has never once had a disciplinary issue since starting elementary school 4 years ago.

I understand your unhappiness about losing recess - ideally it should have been discussed as a potential consequence before it happened. This would have enabled you to help reinforce the need to follow the rules, possibly helping to curtail the disobedience.

She should've already been enforcing it, he's a known runner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm not going to pile on because I had a child who did stuff like this. He used to refuse to walk back from the park and I would get furious calls from the director telling me that I had to do something about it. We took it as a sign that it was just a bad fit and moved him.

I can't tell you that this move was the happy ending; we didn't choose all that well and pulled him from the new place after just a few weeks. We wound up keeping him home with a nanny for about 6 months until he started kindergarten. I worried a lot but he has never once had a disciplinary issue since starting elementary school 4 years ago.

I understand your unhappiness about losing recess - ideally it should have been discussed as a potential consequence before it happened. This would have enabled you to help reinforce the need to follow the rules, possibly helping to curtail the disobedience.

Sounds like the nanny imposed some discipline.

[Anonymous]

OP, just so you know, when your child gets to elementary school running away is considered elopement and is one of the few things that comes with suspension. Police will also be called if the child isn't found immediately because of the safety issue. Missing recess will be the least of your worries next year if you don't get this in check.

[Anonymous]

Wish OP would come back to say she amitds she was wrong

5 pages of piling on and still no OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wish OP would come back to say she amitds she was wrong

5 pages of piling on and still no OP!

OP slinked off with her tail between her legs and she's too ashamed to come back and admit she was wrong.

I hope you apologize to the preschool teachers and directors tomorrow, OP.

[Anonymous]

I had a late runner OP who did it through kindergarten.

Be grateful that you have such firm and r3asonable teach3rs who understand age appropriate consequences. You should apologize to them tomorrow for over reacting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hope this is a private preschool and they kick your kid out. Not because of his behavior but because of your ridiculous response. All the other kids and teachers have to stop everything and wait for your bratty kid to decide when he feels like going inside. You were furious at the school? Why weren't you furious at your child? If he doesn't line up and hides he should miss the next recess.

A private school can always ask the child to leave.

However, a public school has the option to continue the same documented disclipline strategy that they implemented. Just because OP was a royal b**ch and yelled at that, in no way binds them from using the same discipline method again. If the doesn't like it, she can withdraw her precious little royal brat from the school.

OP, you have failed in parenting by allowing this "phase" to go on without consequence. If he is continuing to do this, laughing and thinking it is a game, you have failed to teach him how inappropriate and dangerous this game is. It is your responsibility to stop this habit and your child should not be allowed to continue this behavior without discipline. Since you have failed, the school was forced to take action. You were upset that they disciplined your child for a serious problem that you have failed to correct.

You are "that parent" and I'm sure that the school wants your child out of there. Either you will be asked to leave or they will continue the same discipline. You can choose to accept that they are taking action that you clearly needed to, but didn't or you can withdraw your snowflake from the school and see if you can find any other school that will accept your child and not do the same to him. I doubt you'll find a school that will put up with this bad behavior from your son like you have.

[Anonymous]

This is my favorite thread on DCUM because there is no arguing! Love it! Amazing that we all agree (except for OP) on at least one thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is my favorite thread on DCUM because there is no arguing! Love it! Amazing that we all agree (except for OP) on at least one thing.

+1
A lot of good advice. I hope OP comes back or takes this to heart and apologizes to the school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is behavior I expect from a 2 yr old. By 4 unless a child is intellectually slow it's reasonable to expect them to understand why it's important to stay with the group, come when called, not hide from parents/teachers, etc. Is your son developmentally delayed?

I think your attitude is wrong.

Most four year olds are active, and as you can see from THE REST OF HIS CLASS, all the OTHER four year olds manage to come when called. The problem is your son, not the school.

FYI — most children with intellectual disabilities are very compliant. This is not “stupid” behavior. This is defiance.

[Anonymous]

OP, very gently, I think you have been in denial about what is age appropriate and what is four year old impulse control. It’s time to have your son evaluated. He may have ADD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, very gently, I think you have been in denial about what is age appropriate and what is four year old impulse control. It’s time to have your son evaluated. He may have ADD.

Or he might just need a good spanking!

[Anonymous]

Please seek out alternative care for your child. At this point due to poor child and parent behavior, the workers now dread your arrival each morning. A fresh start elsewhere may be best to avoid having your child in an environment where he is no longer welcome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Wish OP would come back to say she amitds she was wrong

5 pages of piling on and still no OP!

OP slinked off with her tail between her legs and she's too ashamed to come back and admit she was wrong.

I hope you apologize to the preschool teachers and directors tomorrow, OP.

Giving her the benefit of the doubt- this thread was in the GP forum and was moved to the daycare forum. She might not be able to find it if she is not on recents.