Husband says he will have an answer Wednesday as to whether or not he wants to remain married

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wednesday is oddly specific, but I think you should put some thought into dissolving a marriage.

he already knows, he is either signing a rental or meeting a lawyer on tuesday

[Anonymous]

The fact that he added another layer of specificity and said COB is just that much more ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

He already told you with this information, so get your finances organized now. Talk to a lawyer now, know your rights now, so that he isn't going to call the shots.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He already told you with this information, so get your finances organized now. Talk to a lawyer now, know your rights now, so that he isn't going to call the shots.

I doubt he is talking with lawyers, he is just thinking through his options and if he will miss my face. Plus, he said he is too busy to make a quick decision because he is traveling through Wednesday with his coworkers.

[Anonymous]

The information that he is travelling until Wednesday could have been helpful earlier on! It makes sense that he is waiting until he is home from a work trip to have the conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He already told you with this information, so get your finances organized now. Talk to a lawyer now, know your rights now, so that he isn't going to call the shots.

I doubt he is talking with lawyers, he is just thinking through his options and if he will miss my face. Plus, he said he is too busy to make a quick decision because he is traveling through Wednesday with his coworkers.

Wow. It seems so cavalier to announce a divorce after three days deliberation and no big outstanding issues. Good luck to you both.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He already told you with this information, so get your finances organized now. Talk to a lawyer now, know your rights now, so that he isn't going to call the shots.

I doubt he is talking with lawyers, he is just thinking through his options and if he will miss my face. Plus, he said he is too busy to make a quick decision because he is traveling through Wednesday with his coworkers.

Totally totally weird and callous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He already told you with this information, so get your finances organized now. Talk to a lawyer now, know your rights now, so that he isn't going to call the shots.

I doubt he is talking with lawyers, he is just thinking through his options and if he will miss my face. Plus, he said he is too busy to make a quick decision because he is traveling through Wednesday with his coworkers.

So he needs to discuss it with his girlfriend 1st.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've had our ups and downs as of recently and I've been thinking: do I need to be married to him? does he want to be married to me? would we be better off alone? So, when we were having coffee, I asked him if we would be better off divorced. He said he would let me know on Wednesday evening. Also, I've speculated that he's gay and will come out after we divorce.

In this context, his answer was TOTALLY REASONABLE. You asked him a big, threatening question (seemingly) out of the blue. I think you did it in a pretty non-threatening way, though, which is cool. He's answered calmly and reasonably and given himself time to think without jumping to an answer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's planning to talk to a few lawyers on Monday and Tuesday.

+1. And get his finances in order. My guess is if you asked the question, you probably know the answer.

+2

This. Or he's waiting on someone else to let him know if they want to be with him.

My Ex went to see lawyers before he told me he was leaving. It seems odd OP's husband is making her watch the process.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's planning to talk to a few lawyers on Monday and Tuesday.

+1. And get his finances in order. My guess is if you asked the question, you probably know the answer.

+2

This. Or he's waiting on someone else to let him know if they want to be with him.

My Ex went to see lawyers before he told me he was leaving. It seems odd OP's husband is making her watch the process.

PP here and I just saw OP's context. I do think her husband sounds reasonable. He didn't blow up, run upstairs and pack his bags, or any of that. He wants to think it over, both emotionally and financially.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We've had our ups and downs as of recently and I've been thinking: do I need to be married to him? does he want to be married to me? would we be better off alone? So, when we were having coffee, I asked him if we would be better off divorced. He said he would let me know on Wednesday evening. Also, I've speculated that he's gay and will come out after we divorce.

OP, Why do you think he's gay? Doesn't he need more than a few days to consider his options? What other issues have you been having? Every marriage has ups and downs, what about your specific ups and downs make you question your marriage?

[Anonymous]

I suspect he travels with his bf for fun and not for work. I’ve had these suspicions for years and decided he’d be better off with him (gross) and not me. Who knows though, tomorrow evening will be the day of all days when he decides his fate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I suspect he travels with his bf for fun and not for work. I’ve had these suspicions for years and decided he’d be better off with him (gross) and not me. Who knows though, tomorrow evening will be the day of all days when he decides his fate.

You are fairly certain he travels with a bf (best friend? boyfriend? both?) and that he'd be better off with the bf than you and you are letting him decide your fate? Passive much?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I suspect he travels with his bf for fun and not for work. I’ve had these suspicions for years and decided he’d be better off with him (gross) and not me. Who knows though, tomorrow evening will be the day of all days when he decides his fate.

Hey, OP, just hoping that things work out for you as best they can. I imagine it's difficult waiting to talk to your husband. Hope it goes well - whatever "well" means for you. Good luck!