Help me make this work / tell me what to do so I don't burn bridges

[Anonymous]

I'd stay home. How rude and selfish. Your baby, your boobs, your decision.

[Anonymous]

Some people are obsessed with feeding babies. When my son was a baby, I thought it was so weird that a few friends/relatives were like "oh! He needs a bottle? Oh let me do it, can I feed him, I love feeding babies..." Of course I was feeding him a bottle multiple times a day and night, so it was no biggie to me to let someone else give him a bottle. However, when I WAS breastfeeding the first few months, my FIL of all people tried to bully me into skipping nursing sessions so he could give bottles of formula. I mean he would not let it go, and became quite agitated. He said it was to give me a break (but he was so forceful about it, which was strange, and obviously he didn't understand breastfeeding). I stood my ground.

Anyway, your mil is crazy but I can see it happening.

[Anonymous]

Op your husband is awesome!!!

[Anonymous]

OP, how did it go?

[Anonymous]

We need an update.

[Anonymous]

OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

What kind of comments?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

What kind of comments?

Plenty of comparisons of my breast size to SILs to MILs.
Loud announcements of "the boobs are out again"
Discussion of how much my daughter must love my boobs since she eats from them so often.

Nothing terrible but it was a running commentary all weekend.

[Anonymous]

When my MIL chirps about wanting to "give me a break" by hinting she should give a bottle instead of me nursing, I normally ask her if she'd like to come over at 3am to hang out with the baby. Because that's when I'd really like "the break".

I'd be fine if she just said "Oh I'd love to feed Johnny if you're going to give him a bottle while you're here! I enjoy the snuggle" instead of pretending she's doing me some huge favor. Just own it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

Oh man you need a backbone. As does your DH.

"Mary, I'll be in the back bedroom. We'll be out in 30 minutes".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

What kind of comments?

Plenty of comparisons of my breast size to SILs to MILs.
Loud announcements of "the boobs are out again"
Discussion of how much my daughter must love my boobs since she eats from them so often.

Nothing terrible but it was a running commentary all weekend.

Holy cow, you have a LOT of patience. You had every right to nurse in the bedroom, or stay at your hotel. All those comments were inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

What kind of comments?

Plenty of comparisons of my breast size to SILs to MILs.
Loud announcements of "the boobs are out again"
Discussion of how much my daughter must love my boobs since she eats from them so often.

Nothing terrible but it was a running commentary all weekend.

Holy cow, you have a LOT of patience. You had every right to nurse in the bedroom, or stay at your hotel. All those comments were inappropriate.

Also, is your MIL just kind of inappropriate in general? My MIL is like this, and it works MUCH better if I do what I want instead of feeling like I need to go along with her, because she doesn't really make sense. I just tell her when I don't want to hear her say certain things. I can totally see her saying "don't nurse in the bedroom!" but I'd just say "sorry, I am nursing in the bedroom" and that would be the end of it. She's not a hostile person at all -- this isn't a battle of the wills things -- she's just inappropriate and a bit weird. As long as I lay out things clearly for her, it's fine. But if I try to go along with her weirdness, then I eventually get really annoyed, which is not good for anyone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

What kind of comments?

Plenty of comparisons of my breast size to SILs to MILs.
Loud announcements of "the boobs are out again"
Discussion of how much my daughter must love my boobs since she eats from them so often.

Nothing terrible but it was a running commentary all weekend.

This MIL is seriously in the running for worst MIL I've heard about on DCUM... and that is really saying something.
OP, you are a class act to rise above. I think if it had been me, after the first boob comment, I would have said, "MIL, if you make one more comment about my breasts, or my breastfeeding, we are leaving." If she had (and of course this woman WOULD have--she's mentally unhinged on this subject) I would have not said a word. Just gathering up baby, stuff, and DH, and left.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here and the weekend went ok. MIL wouldn't let me nurse in a bedroom (in the vein of "no, don't take my baby away!") so I had to just nurse in the dining room and I got a lot of comments from MIL on my breasts. But, DD was fed so it is what it is, we dealt with it and there was less drama than I was afraid there would be.

Unfortunately, apparently BILs entire family was sick but we weren't told about it until we were there for a few hours on Saturday so now DD is sick and generally pretty miserable. Gotta love family!

What kind of comments?

Plenty of comparisons of my breast size to SILs to MILs.
Loud announcements of "the boobs are out again"
Discussion of how much my daughter must love my boobs since she eats from them so often.

Nothing terrible but it was a running commentary all weekend.

Okay, great job OP. You handled that weekend amazingly. But please recognize that unwanted commentary about any body part is not okay, and unwanted commentary about your breasts is sexual harassment (yes, even in the context of bfing). You have every right to react much more strongly to comments like that - and I think you should next time.

[Anonymous]

"Mary, it is really odd for you to be so focused on breastfeeding, especially as I have offered to feed Larla in private. Because of your incessant commentary, I will now be either feeding privately in the bedroom, or in the hotel. Which do you prefer, and out here in public is no longer an option."