Other parents commenting on my child's weight

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

He is 4"3 and weighs about 75 pounds. I haven't measured his waist for ages but judging by his trousers size I believe it to be around 26-28 inches.

http://www.calculator.net/ideal-weight-calculator.html?ctype=metric&cage=10&csex=m&cheightfeet=5&cheightinch=10&cheightmeter=137&printit=0&x=81&y=9[url]

I am the same pp you replied to. This is a website mostly for adults to calculate weight and height but you can input 10 years old as well. It seems that your 10 year old is on the higher end of acceptable weight for height range. Hence, he must carry most of this in his belly, if that is what you re noticing. If it is was my kid I would try to enforce healthy food and I think time will take care of it with growth spurts and muscle. Higher end weight at his age might seem like a big deal around here among the "worship skin and bones" population. When you put 93rd percentile BMI, I think that gave the impression of obese, even to me. BMI is a very poor and new tool. Given this information, keep your kids active, don't fall pray to high sugar diet and don't worry about your boys and let them see you making an issue of their weight. So, imo, he is far from obese, and those parents need to stop being rude. I am from Europe and it used to be that grandmas considered it healthy that kid had some extra weight, and might end up tall and healthy later on. As I tell my kids, who are actually slim for US standard, very slim, there is no way there will ever be tiny and slim boned like some kids from certain Asian countries, as genetics are genetics. Hope nobody is offended by this comment.

You can't use an adult BMI scale or height-weight percentiles for an 8 year old child. Totally inaccurate. Try this for a child: https://nccd.cdc.gov/dnpabmi/Calculator.aspx

[Anonymous]

Whether you like it or not, he's fat.

So now, what are you going to do about it?

[Anonymous]

OP both of my nephews were chunky at 8. Slimmed out by pre teen years and one still eats a LOT! I wouldnt worry about it.

Also, I see a boy at a pool who some would call overweight. But he swims like a fish with perfect form and I'm in awe every time I see him. And a bit jealous. That boy ROCKS!

[Anonymous]

Reasons why he's still fat with swimming:

"If you want to lose weight, you're better off walking around a pool than swimming in it," according to Sydney exercise physiologist and personal trainer Andrew Cate.

"That's obviously a bit extreme, but it does make the point. From a fat-loss perspective, swimming has some real negatives compared to other forms of exercise."

Cool water and appetite
Professor Cox believes it's the cool environment in the pool (26 degrees Celsius) that may explain, at least in part, why the swimmers in her study had the edge when it came to weight loss.

Paradoxically, cool water may also explain why many swimmers find fat hard to budge.

It comes down to the impact of this cool environment on two aspects of the body in the post-swim period: the swimmer's appetite (which affects how much they eat afterwards) and the energy the swimmer expends to restore their normal body temperature.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First of all, those other parents were rude. Commenting on another kid's weight is rude.

+1 Rude and pathetic, I might add.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For starters, let go of what you overheard. If they said it directly to you, that would be different, but you were eavesdropping and one of the consequences of that is that you will likely hear things you don't like.

As for your son, what did the doctor say, specifically, about his weight? If your doctor is not concerned, then I would not be concerned, but you could mention it to the doctor and see what he says. You mentioned that portion sizes were an issue for your other child. What does a typical meal look like for your family?

Oh, come on! It is incredibly rude to talk disparagingly about another person's body regardless of whether that person is an adult or a child & whether or not he or she (or his or her parent) overhears the conversation.Those women sound like a pair of mean spirited gossips.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your sons sounds obese. And if not by complete medical range, which I read is 95% and above, 2% is not really any of the difference there. By world wide accepted rules optimal BMI is around 25th percentile. anything above represents not optimal weight for the person's height. Maybe this is a wake up call you need to take better care of your kids.

Think you're missing much of what I've said. Yes his BMI is higher than average and yes he has a chubby belly, but I have taken medical advice from a doctor about my son who seems a lot less concerned than you are. It's important to remember weight is not always fat and muscle weights more than fat, and he's a strong kid. Nevertheless, his BMI will be ever changing as he's at the peak of his growing stage, and AS THE DOCTORE SAID, it is likely he is strong fat for a growth spurt. And just to clear up the last comment, my other son the 10 y/o is fit and healthy yet still appears overweight on the scale. I am taking fine care of my kids and if it's such as massive issue why did the doctor seem so relaxed?

I am only trying to give some perspective. Doctors see many overweight people, and many are resigned that there is little parents can/want to do. I would go see a nutritionist, ask for referral if needed, or go on your own if your insurance doesn't ask for specialist referrals. For a nutritionist you don't even have to pay copay. That is a lot of storing fat for a growth spurt. If you are so sure it is just mean parents, post your boy's weight and height. It is a better tool for determining if somebody is overweight.

See a dietician not a nutritionist. Dieticians have far more education. Also, make sure the dietician has experience working with kids. An 8-year-old with years of growth still to go is a whole different ball game than an adult.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your sons sounds obese. And if not by complete medical range, which I read is 95% and above, 2% is not really any of the difference there. By world wide accepted rules optimal BMI is around 25th percentile. anything above represents not optimal weight for the person's height. Maybe this is a wake up call you need to take better care of your kids.

Think you're missing much of what I've said. Yes his BMI is higher than average and yes he has a chubby belly, but I have taken medical advice from a doctor about my son who seems a lot less concerned than you are. It's important to remember weight is not always fat and muscle weights more than fat, and he's a strong kid. Nevertheless, his BMI will be ever changing as he's at the peak of his growing stage, and AS THE DOCTORE SAID, it is likely he is strong fat for a growth spurt. And just to clear up the last comment, my other son the 10 y/o is fit and healthy yet still appears overweight on the scale. I am taking fine care of my kids and if it's such as massive issue why did the doctor seem so relaxed?

I am only trying to give some perspective. Doctors see many overweight people, and many are resigned that there is little parents can/want to do. I would go see a nutritionist, ask for referral if needed, or go on your own if your insurance doesn't ask for specialist referrals. For a nutritionist you don't even have to pay copay. That is a lot of storing fat for a growth spurt. If you are so sure it is just mean parents, post your boy's weight and height. It is a better tool for determining if somebody is overweight.

He is 4"3 and weighs about 75 pounds. I haven't measured his waist for ages but judging by his trousers size I believe it to be around 26-28 inches.

Wow yes he is overweight. I am a grown adult with 2 kids and I have a 26 inch waist probably, maybe even smaller. 93% BMI and 75 lbs at 8? He's fat. He may have a growth spurt and thin out but for now he's fat and you shouldn't be in denial of that.

[Anonymous]

Kids don't go through "chubby phases" at age 8. If they are still chubby at 8, they will probably fight it forever.

[Anonymous]

OP. I am pp who asked about weight and height. I meant don't make a big deal, not see them make a big deal.I just wanted to add that since you are in England, there are different percentiles than here in the US. You are on Washington D.C. forum and while not as bad as somewhere else half people here are Gwyneth Paltrow's replicas. My kids went to British school overseas at the age of your kids. I saw many kids that sound just like your boys, early growth spurts, bellies. Often tall for their age kids. I assume your son's pediatrician see similar boys all the time. Almost none of these boys are obese now, year later. You have to take into account that US percentiles are made on extremely varied ethnic population and you need to look at Northern European ethnicity. Are your boys more heavy than they should be? Yes, but unless you are completely delusional, you will know when it is a real issue. I went through a chubby phase till 14 years old, and then was as skinny as a stick, no joke, 100lbs at 21, and 5'4".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. I am pp who asked about weight and height. I meant don't make a big deal, not see them make a big deal.I just wanted to add that since you are in England, there are different percentiles than here in the US. You are on Washington D.C. forum and while not as bad as somewhere else half people here are Gwyneth Paltrow's replicas. My kids went to British school overseas at the age of your kids. I saw many kids that sound just like your boys, early growth spurts, bellies. Often tall for their age kids. I assume your son's pediatrician see similar boys all the time. Almost none of these boys are obese now, year later. You have to take into account that US percentiles are made on extremely varied ethnic population and you need to look at Northern European ethnicity. Are your boys more heavy than they should be? Yes, but unless you are completely delusional, you will know when it is a real issue. I went through a chubby phase till 14 years old, and then was as skinny as a stick, no joke, 100lbs at 21, and 5'4".

^^ years later

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure he's as skinny as you make out because something must have triggered those parents to be making those remarks? When he's swimming what are the aesthetic signals for obesity? I.e does he have a belly? Does he have chubby legs and face? Can he fit into the right clothes for his age? You say it's worse when he sits down - what do you mean by this? If you let us know this it will be much easier for us to give you our opinion. However if the doctor is not concerned I wouldn't get overly worked up about it![/quote
Is he wearing speedos as in speedos that look like underwear briefs (barely any inseam) or the brand speedos? Is he on a swim team? All the other boys are wearing jammers (look like bicycling shorts). I think needs bigger shorts. Look for "husky" size so 10H or 12H. Or buy him a bigger size and learn to sew.

Sort of like underwear briefs but they're quite old now so getting very tight on him. And husky sizes don't really fit very well on him, which relates to when I said he's an awkward size to buy for. And sewing is possible but I don't think I'd be good enough for it not to come un-done mid swim and that would be a disaster (although slightly funny).

Do you think that it might be the shorts that make him look so fat? If the shorts are very tight on him, it is sort of inevitable his belly is going to overlap them when he sits down as they will be pressing into him. What age are his shorts? I think new longer swimming trunks will help him look like he has less of a fat belly and hopefully bring yours and his self esteem up a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are you sure he's as skinny as you make out because something must have triggered those parents to be making those remarks? When he's swimming what are the aesthetic signals for obesity? I.e does he have a belly? Does he have chubby legs and face? Can he fit into the right clothes for his age? You say it's worse when he sits down - what do you mean by this? If you let us know this it will be much easier for us to give you our opinion. However if the doctor is not concerned I wouldn't get overly worked up about it![/quote
Is he wearing speedos as in speedos that look like underwear briefs (barely any inseam) or the brand speedos? Is he on a swim team? All the other boys are wearing jammers (look like bicycling shorts). I think needs bigger shorts. Look for "husky" size so 10H or 12H. Or buy him a bigger size and learn to sew.

Sort of like underwear briefs but they're quite old now so getting very tight on him. And husky sizes don't really fit very well on him, which relates to when I said he's an awkward size to buy for. And sewing is possible but I don't think I'd be good enough for it not to come un-done mid swim and that would be a disaster (although slightly funny).

Do you think that it might be the shorts that make him look so fat? If the shorts are very tight on him, it is sort of inevitable his belly is going to overlap them when he sits down as they will be pressing into him. What age are his shorts? I think new longer swimming trunks will help him look like he has less of a fat belly and hopefully bring yours and his self esteem up a bit.

Yes I completely agree the shorts are tight and that definitely brings out his belly more, but it is so hard to find trunks that fit ok. I think his swimming trunks are age 9 maybe but he has had them for such a long time they have almost definitely stretched as he's grown. And I also agree that longer swimming trunks would make him look skinnier but none of the longer ones are elasticcy so they are either too big and fall down or are ridiculously small and don't go or button up! If anyone knows any places that do long elastic or stretchy sort of trunks or trunks with an elasticcy waist that are long can you let me know? It's just now you've mentioned it I don't want him getting self conscious and worrying that his trunks 'disappear' when he takes a seat.

[Anonymous]

His waist is much MUCH bigger than my 7 year old who's almost 8 - he's probably just in the early 20s (inches). Your son's belly obviously sticks out far too far and I dread to think how he copes with it. Especially swimming in small tight trunks he must be quite embarrassed and if not now as soon as he's old to realise his size he will not be happy with his body. He must have difficulties with his fat daily. When I was a chubby kid I hated my belly and how I couldn't see my feet well or couldn't keep up with people or fit into certain things. Don't leave it too late to do something about it. There are too many obese children already don't let him slip into that category.

[Anonymous]

If it's hard to find trunks hat fit it's because he's fat

Quit looking at fat as a value judgment and start looking at it as a descriptor. It's a physical attribute. He's fat. Only your family can decide if that bothers your or not. But what you're doing is essentially looking at a kid with brown hair and insisting he's blonde.