High school senior daughter asked me "What's the point of all this?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"The point is that I'm not going to be your lifetime beneficiary so if you want food to eat clothes to wear and a roof over your head when you hit 18 then it's in your best interest to put yourself in a position to attain those things."

LMFAO. You realize that 70% of adults in the US don't even have a bachelor's degree or higher, much less one from a top 10 school? That is probably less than 1% of the population in the US. You really think that 99% of people over the age of 18 don't have food to eat, clothes to wear, or a roof over their head?

I'm not concerned with the 70% of flyover trash, Walmart employees, etc. I personally don't know any adults without a bachelors. DMV is the wealthiest and most educated region in the USA. The bar here is higher.

Hey! This flyover trash earns $500K/year plus 30-70% bonus. BS and MS from State U, doctorate from Marquette. DH is from DC with degrees from Hopkins and Georgetown. I out earn him x3.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"The point is that I'm not going to be your lifetime beneficiary so if you want food to eat clothes to wear and a roof over your head when you hit 18 then it's in your best interest to put yourself in a position to attain those things."

LMFAO. You realize that 70% of adults in the US don't even have a bachelor's degree or higher, much less one from a top 10 school? That is probably less than 1% of the population in the US. You really think that 99% of people over the age of 18 don't have food to eat, clothes to wear, or a roof over their head?

I'm not concerned with the 70% of flyover trash, Walmart employees, etc. I personally don't know any adults without a bachelors. DMV is the wealthiest and most educated region in the USA. The bar here is higher.

Hey! This flyover trash earns $500K/year plus 30-70% bonus. BS and MS from State U, doctorate from Marquette. DH is from DC with degrees from Hopkins and Georgetown. I out earn him x3.

All of those degrees and you lack reading comprehension?
70% was clearly in reference to the "70% of adults that do not have a bachelors."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"The point is that I'm not going to be your lifetime beneficiary so if you want food to eat clothes to wear and a roof over your head when you hit 18 then it's in your best interest to put yourself in a position to attain those things."

LMFAO. You realize that 70% of adults in the US don't even have a bachelor's degree or higher, much less one from a top 10 school? That is probably less than 1% of the population in the US. You really think that 99% of people over the age of 18 don't have food to eat, clothes to wear, or a roof over their head?

I'm not concerned with the 70% of flyover trash, Walmart employees, etc. I personally don't know any adults without a bachelors. DMV is the wealthiest and most educated region in the USA. The bar here is higher.

http://www.governing.com/blogs/by-the-numbers/graduate-professional-degrees-for-metro-areas.html
The majority of over-25 adults in the Washington DC metro area do not have bachelor's degrees.

Again, do you move in those circles - Walmart employees, fast food workers, street cleaners? Do you do happy hour with the janitors from your office? Stop injecting data from low people into a high-SES conversation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"The point is that I'm not going to be your lifetime beneficiary so if you want food to eat clothes to wear and a roof over your head when you hit 18 then it's in your best interest to put yourself in a position to attain those things."

LMFAO. You realize that 70% of adults in the US don't even have a bachelor's degree or higher, much less one from a top 10 school? That is probably less than 1% of the population in the US. You really think that 99% of people over the age of 18 don't have food to eat, clothes to wear, or a roof over their head?

I'm not concerned with the 70% of flyover trash, Walmart employees, etc. I personally don't know any adults without a bachelors. DMV is the wealthiest and most educated region in the USA. The bar here is higher.

Hey! This flyover trash earns $500K/year plus 30-70% bonus. BS and MS from State U, doctorate from Marquette. DH is from DC with degrees from Hopkins and Georgetown. I out earn him x3.

All of those degrees and you lack reading comprehension?
70% was clearly in reference to the "70% of adults that do not have a bachelors."

60%-65% have some college.

65

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"So you can find a quality husband and have babies. Now get your nose back to the grindstone, missy!"

Actually, a PP said it best; so you can have choices and live the kind of life you want. If she decides to stay home with her children she will be much better positioned to do so if she has a degree and a career beforehand. This will also give her the choice to go back to work at a meaningful job once the kids are older - IF she decides that is what she wants.

(Nice try PP! Btw I do hope your daughter decides to raise her kids herself just so you can throw a fit! Lol)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your daughter is correct.

There is no point to an elite college.... Unless your intention is to have rich friends.

The point to life is to be a good person, have good friends, be kind to strangers, give back to your community and (hopefully) have a close family.

A surgeon from Penn is no happier than a plumber, if you can afford a house, food, have close friends.

Once you have a certain amount of money, happiness does not increase with more money and eventually declines.

What? Or to have the kind of career that only an elite college can open for you? I work in finance and I know there are banks and money managers who will *only* recruit from the ivy league. They do that because they can, because they get SO many applicants that they can easily afford to be choosy. I know finance is not most people's idea of a good time so substitute any competitive career (journalism, magazines, book publishing, politics, museum curating, certain high profile tech companies) for what I just said.

Which just shows how ignorant the old school finance world is. Google did a study, after only hiring from elite schools. They changed their model and found student from elite schools were not better employees than students from state schools.

You need to educate yourself on the current trends in new business and hiring. advising your kids on knowledge that is 30 years old will not serve them well.

Are you seriously trying to tell me that if your kid was torn between a school like Yale and one more like UMD you'd advise UMD???? For what reason? Money and the desire a lucrative profession aside, students obviously receive a WORLD CLASS education at Yale. Not so UMD.

Furthermore, I would argue that anyone who says money is not important has no idea what it is like to be poor and constantly do without.

[Anonymous]

This entire thread is insane and delusional! OBVIOUSLY you can still do well in life with a BA from a middling state university. However, it is MUCH EASIER to get a good job (which I would define as BOTH interesting and financially lucrative) from a top school. Are you really going to argue against that, as a general trend?

Everyone thinks they are an outlier. Guess what, statistically that CANNOT be true.

OP's daughter should push herself now so she has more options later on. Not push herself so that she has to take Aderall or winds up in the hospital (that should go without saying), but push herself in the sense that she chooses to study over watching tv or just hanging out doing nothing. That is all I am saying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your daughter is correct.

There is no point to an elite college.... Unless your intention is to have rich friends.

The point to life is to be a good person, have good friends, be kind to strangers, give back to your community and (hopefully) have a close family.

A surgeon from Penn is no happier than a plumber, if you can afford a house, food, have close friends.

Once you have a certain amount of money, happiness does not increase with more money and eventually declines.

What? Or to have the kind of career that only an elite college can open for you? I work in finance and I know there are banks and money managers who will *only* recruit from the ivy league. They do that because they can, because they get SO many applicants that they can easily afford to be choosy. I know finance is not most people's idea of a good time so substitute any competitive career (journalism, magazines, book publishing, politics, museum curating, certain high profile tech companies) for what I just said.

Which just shows how ignorant the old school finance world is. Google did a study, after only hiring from elite schools. They changed their model and found student from elite schools were not better employees than students from state schools.

You need to educate yourself on the current trends in new business and hiring. advising your kids on knowledge that is 30 years old will not serve them well.

Different PP here. But those firms (law, finance, et cetera) that only recruit from Ivy Leagues *are* the rat race. If OP's daughter is exhausted by the rat race as a teenager, what makes you think she'll be happy in that world?

If the point in running the rat race as a teen is to gain entry to an adult rat race where the pressure is even higher and more cutthroat, then it doesn't seem worth it. I suspect that is OP's daughter's point. Her question isn't necessarily, "What is the point?" Her question is actually, "When does it end? When does it get better?"

I'm the PP who said if I had a child who seemed to have the aptitude/ability and interest in a trade, I'd advocate getting training and certification in a trade but also getting a bachelor's from a relatively ("relative" being the key word) inexpensive college just for the sake of having the piece of paper. That stems from figuring out what kind of career training will provide BOTH job security/stability AND work-life balance. I believe that finding a career that hits that sweet spot is probably the best recipe for a happy life.

I agree. Going to an elite so you can get a job at a top bank or consulting firm sounds like an awful life. You need to love money so much that you spend your life chasing it.

To you maybe. To many others the financial markets are inherently fascinating and the competition invigorating. I for one would be bored without it. I love my job. I love the challenge. I even love how maddening it can sometimes be (when I'm trying to be objective and philosophical It is always, always compelling to me, even when (maybe especially when) it's not going my way. And the money is *very* nice. It's the cherry on top of an already delicious sundae. And what I'm saying is, if you think you could love this work, you can walk right on in if you come out of one of the top ten schools.

A lot of fields are the same - publishing, magazines, journalism, museums, fashion, diplomacy, politics. What else? Coding? I'm going to assume it is easier to get a job at a top tech company coming out of Stanford, Cal Tech, MIT than UMD. It's just easier if you come out of a top school. Push yourself early on if you want to have more options in life later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your daughter is correct.

There is no point to an elite college.... Unless your intention is to have rich friends.

The point to life is to be a good person, have good friends, be kind to strangers, give back to your community and (hopefully) have a close family.

A surgeon from Penn is no happier than a plumber, if you can afford a house, food, have close friends.

Once you have a certain amount of money, happiness does not increase with more money and eventually declines.

What? Or to have the kind of career that only an elite college can open for you? I work in finance and I know there are banks and money managers who will *only* recruit from the ivy league. They do that because they can, because they get SO many applicants that they can easily afford to be choosy. I know finance is not most people's idea of a good time so substitute any competitive career (journalism, magazines, book publishing, politics, museum curating, certain high profile tech companies) for what I just said.

I went to high school with several people who work in finance,many of whom attended elite colleges & have done extremely well. My former classmate with most successful career in finance, however, went to the University of Delaware ( & didn't go to grad school). By the time she was in her late 20s, she was a VP for a major financial group (think JP Morgan, Cantor Fitzgerald, Merrill Lynch, etc) -- & her career trajectory has only continued to rise from there.

A degree from an elite school can certainly open doors but this is far from the only way to get in.

I know a broad that went to Rutgers on an athletic scholarship. Works in finance and makes $Ms per year. Why? She's attractive and a former athlete. That's called an outlier, not a template.

This bears repeating. Everyone thinks they are a special snowflake. But they're not. Only a very very few are by definition.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The game for women is to pretend to be a gunner, get into an elite undergrad, meet an ambitious boy destined for $, work a few years as a consultant (maybe even masters or law school), become a stay at home mom by your late 20s.

Looks like part of your post got cut off, let me fix it for you.

Anonymous wrote:"The game for women is to pretend to be a gunner, get into an elite undergrad, meet an ambitious boy destined for $, work a few years as a consultant (maybe even masters or law school), become a stay at home mom by your late 20s," said Donald Trump in his new book "Why Sexism Isn't Really A Thing," available in bookstores now.

[Anonymous]

Yes. It was so fascinating to watch you trash the economy with no moral qualms about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your daughter is correct.

There is no point to an elite college.... Unless your intention is to have rich friends.

The point to life is to be a good person, have good friends, be kind to strangers, give back to your community and (hopefully) have a close family.

A surgeon from Penn is no happier than a plumber, if you can afford a house, food, have close friends.

Once you have a certain amount of money, happiness does not increase with more money and eventually declines.

What? Or to have the kind of career that only an elite college can open for you? I work in finance and I know there are banks and money managers who will *only* recruit from the ivy league. They do that because they can, because they get SO many applicants that they can easily afford to be choosy. I know finance is not most people's idea of a good time so substitute any competitive career (journalism, magazines, book publishing, politics, museum curating, certain high profile tech companies) for what I just said.

Which just shows how ignorant the old school finance world is. Google did a study, after only hiring from elite schools. They changed their model and found student from elite schools were not better employees than students from state schools.

You need to educate yourself on the current trends in new business and hiring. advising your kids on knowledge that is 30 years old will not serve them well.

Different PP here. But those firms (law, finance, et cetera) that only recruit from Ivy Leagues *are* the rat race. If OP's daughter is exhausted by the rat race as a teenager, what makes you think she'll be happy in that world?

If the point in running the rat race as a teen is to gain entry to an adult rat race where the pressure is even higher and more cutthroat, then it doesn't seem worth it. I suspect that is OP's daughter's point. Her question isn't necessarily, "What is the point?" Her question is actually, "When does it end? When does it get better?"

I'm the PP who said if I had a child who seemed to have the aptitude/ability and interest in a trade, I'd advocate getting training and certification in a trade but also getting a bachelor's from a relatively ("relative" being the key word) inexpensive college just for the sake of having the piece of paper. That stems from figuring out what kind of career training will provide BOTH job security/stability AND work-life balance. I believe that finding a career that hits that sweet spot is probably the best recipe for a happy life.

I agree. Going to an elite so you can get a job at a top bank or consulting firm sounds like an awful life. You need to love money so much that you spend your life chasing it.

To you maybe. To many others the financial markets are inherently fascinating and the competition invigorating. I for one would be bored without it. I love my job. I love the challenge. I even love how maddening it can sometimes be (when I'm trying to be objective and philosophical It is always, always compelling to me, even when (maybe especially when) it's not going my way. And the money is *very* nice. It's the cherry on top of an already delicious sundae. And what I'm saying is, if you think you could love this work, you can walk right on in if you come out of one of the top ten schools.

A lot of fields are the same - publishing, magazines, journalism, museums, fashion, diplomacy, politics. What else? Coding? I'm going to assume it is easier to get a job at a top tech company coming out of Stanford, Cal Tech, MIT than UMD. It's just easier if you come out of a top school. Push yourself early on if you want to have more options in life later.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yes. It was so fascinating to watch you trash the economy with no moral qualms about it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your daughter is correct.

There is no point to an elite college.... Unless your intention is to have rich friends.

The point to life is to be a good person, have good friends, be kind to strangers, give back to your community and (hopefully) have a close family.

A surgeon from Penn is no happier than a plumber, if you can afford a house, food, have close friends.

Once you have a certain amount of money, happiness does not increase with more money and eventually declines.

What? Or to have the kind of career that only an elite college can open for you? I work in finance and I know there are banks and money managers who will *only* recruit from the ivy league. They do that because they can, because they get SO many applicants that they can easily afford to be choosy. I know finance is not most people's idea of a good time so substitute any competitive career (journalism, magazines, book publishing, politics, museum curating, certain high profile tech companies) for what I just said.

This is a straw man argument. Do you know how many thousands of people work in areas of finance that had about as much to do with mortgage backed securities as your work does? Come on.

Which just shows how ignorant the old school finance world is. Google did a study, after only hiring from elite schools. They changed their model and found student from elite schools were not better employees than students from state schools.

You need to educate yourself on the current trends in new business and hiring. advising your kids on knowledge that is 30 years old will not serve them well.

Different PP here. But those firms (law, finance, et cetera) that only recruit from Ivy Leagues *are* the rat race. If OP's daughter is exhausted by the rat race as a teenager, what makes you think she'll be happy in that world?

If the point in running the rat race as a teen is to gain entry to an adult rat race where the pressure is even higher and more cutthroat, then it doesn't seem worth it. I suspect that is OP's daughter's point. Her question isn't necessarily, "What is the point?" Her question is actually, "When does it end? When does it get better?"

I'm the PP who said if I had a child who seemed to have the aptitude/ability and interest in a trade, I'd advocate getting training and certification in a trade but also getting a bachelor's from a relatively ("relative" being the key word) inexpensive college just for the sake of having the piece of paper. That stems from figuring out what kind of career training will provide BOTH job security/stability AND work-life balance. I believe that finding a career that hits that sweet spot is probably the best recipe for a happy life.

I agree. Going to an elite so you can get a job at a top bank or consulting firm sounds like an awful life. You need to love money so much that you spend your life chasing it.

To you maybe. To many others the financial markets are inherently fascinating and the competition invigorating. I for one would be bored without it. I love my job. I love the challenge. I even love how maddening it can sometimes be (when I'm trying to be objective and philosophical It is always, always compelling to me, even when (maybe especially when) it's not going my way. And the money is *very* nice. It's the cherry on top of an already delicious sundae. And what I'm saying is, if you think you could love this work, you can walk right on in if you come out of one of the top ten schools.

A lot of fields are the same - publishing, magazines, journalism, museums, fashion, diplomacy, politics. What else? Coding? I'm going to assume it is easier to get a job at a top tech company coming out of Stanford, Cal Tech, MIT than UMD. It's just easier if you come out of a top school. Push yourself early on if you want to have more options in life later.

[Anonymous]

The quote function on here is messed up.

To the above poster, your complaint is a straw man argument. Thousands of people work in areas of finance that have nothing to do with mortgage back securities or any kind of bonds.

[Anonymous]

What's the point?

To secure a high-status job in a top tier city, a quality social circle, and a smart & rich spouse who you can produce bright offspring with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Are you seriously trying to tell me that if your kid was torn between a school like Yale and one more like UMD you'd advise UMD???? For what reason? Money and the desire a lucrative profession aside, students obviously receive a WORLD CLASS education at Yale. Not so UMD.

Yale grad here. Go to Yale for the prestige, connections and future opportunities, absolutely, but don't think that undergraduates there are getting a "world class" education. Much like UMD (or any other large university), the majority of classes are lectures by professors (which these days anyone can see online), and discussion sections taught by grad students. For a truly great education where you really interact with faculty, get mentoring, have real research opportunities as an undergrad, etc. go to a liberal arts college. Or go to UMD (if in-state), and get a similar education to Yale and pay 1/5 the tuition.