How long have you gone without sex?

Anonymous
Full pelvic bed rest during a high-risk pregnancy. Gave my DH BJs, but I wasn't allowed to have orgasms or intercourse.

Five months. Five long months. Luckily, baby was healthy.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:15 years. And counting. And know what? It's not the big deal I thought it was. Not desperate at all. I give myself an orgasm when I need it and then I'm done with it. The need to have sex with another person just never seems to equal the hassle.
What no ask me anything responders?



I'm not in shock, I understand, I said it had been 9 years for me and I can see it going longer.
Anonymous
First off, any woman can find a sexual partner whenever she wants. As a man, longest drought was two years when a serious relationship ended, I moved, and took some time to get used to a new job and city.
Anonymous
21:06 -not necessarily. And not without having to settle, bigtime. I could maybe go to a bar and pick up some loser for a one-nighter, but why? Better to hold out for someone I actually like, and to whom I'm attracted.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:21:06 -not necessarily. And not without having to settle, bigtime. I could maybe go to a bar and pick up some loser for a one-nighter, but why? Better to hold out for someone I actually like, and to whom I'm attracted.


Yeah, well, that's still a luxury from a guy's perspective. Most of us would be fairly lucky to get a one-nighter if we walked into a bar tonight, no matter whether we were willing to settle a lot or not. It's easier to hold out for a steak dinner if you know that when you need it, at the very least, there's grilled cheese available. You'll jump at anything edible if you're not sure that you'll ever eat again.
Anonymous
Prob 2 months - end of pregnancy and post-pregnancy, but I still performed oral on him (he offered but I didnt not want to be touched).

Otherwise, at most a week.

Pre-marriage, approx a year but I was the master of "everything but intervourse".
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Where can single early 30s men find you women who just want a FWB to cool off?! Forget about paying us as escorts, just no strings fun...!


I would love a single early 30s guy...signed, late 40s woman in No.VA...tell me where to find you....


In my case it would certainly involve a hop on a plane every now and then Dealbreaker.....?


even better!!


How to send you my email discreetly....?


Set up a log in name here, and I'll do the same?


Will let you know once the DCUM administrators set up my account. Been waiting a while to get that confirmation email..........
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:2 days


Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Just in case there are other women like me already feeling really, really, really guilty about the lack of sex in our marriage....please don't read this thread and feel like a failure for not giving your partner what he or she needs. There can be reasons for 'sexless spells' and there can be assistance, too.

Diseases and factors other than cancer can cause real issues with sex: those of us who've had or who are dealing with those issues need to get help (without a doubt) for ourselves and for the health of the relationship as well. (As one primary care doctor kept insisting to me before I left his practice "you need to deal with this because men like sex".... as if I didn't know that.....) But sometimes, when you're trying to deal with the physical or psychological pain that can come with sex due to underlying issues, you can be in a long dry spell. It's not good. It has consequences (including guilt). I am sure it can lead to affairs.

It also doesn't have to be 'this way' and I hope that women who, like me, find themselves terrified of the pain that sex involves can find the right therapists and physicians to help them. I'm saying all this because multiple times, I've seen threads like this on DCUM and skipped them because I already felt awful enough that I wasn't 'having enough sex' to keep my husband happy (forget about any self-pleasure -- with certain disorders, there's no pleasure in sex until/unless there's treatment). Ironically, just in the past month I have finally found a physician and a care team whom I trust to help me get over the challenges.

These disorders can be anything from interstitial cystitis to adhesions to vaginismus to emotional or psychological challenges connecting to repressed memories -- there are lots more potential causes, all of which can be addressed in some way, and for many of these, there are also support groups. I'm just beginning to find and use these resources and can only say that I wish I had done so earlier -- for my husband's sake and for mine, too. Good luck to any who, as I was, may be going long periods without sex for reasons that are full of pain in all kinds of ways.


Is there some reason you waited to get treatment until AFTER you got married?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:have to think hard but the answer is 9 years and still in that drought. Long time affair with married man ended in giant scandal, more for him than me, made me so scared. Now I'm single mom ands getting older and not that interested.

Do occasionally masturbate but not that often.

But do wonder why there isn't a service where I could pay man as escort for sex if I got really desperate.


There is!! Watch the show Gigolos... I think it's on Showtime, but could be cinemax.
Anonymous
Too long.
Anonymous
The longest I have ever gone is 3 weeks after giving birth to my son and I was told to wait 6 weeks! 3 weeks was LONG enough. My DH and I have sex 3-4 times a week and it is great sex! We have been together 7 years and hoping we are still in the same boat far into the future.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:21:06 -not necessarily. And not without having to settle, bigtime. I could maybe go to a bar and pick up some loser for a one-nighter, but why? Better to hold out for someone I actually like, and to whom I'm attracted.


You think men don't end up having to settle, big time?
Anonymous
7 years. Ended a long term relationship with a boyfriend that was so emotionally abusive and it took me a LONG TIME to be okay with myself again.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Just came off a 2 year dry spell. Before that it was one year.

I think you're my partner.


Yes. it's me. now go back to bed.
post reply Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Message Quick Reply
Go to: