Judgemental DC parents

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

I don't think they're from my real life, actually. But even if they are, why would I care what they think of me? I mean that in all seriousness.


Because you are human. Nice try though.


Let's assume that I know best about the way I feel, and you know best about the way you feel, shall we?

For example, if I do know somebody in real life who thinks that regular swimsuits on children (instead of swim shirts and swim shorts) are trashy (this is actually something I learned on DCUM), then that person is probably not somebody whose opinion of me I care a lot about.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

People may be judging me by my home, car, children's school, children's activities, job, and income -- but if they are, they're being extremely discreet about it. Or I'm extremely good at denial. One way or the other, it's working for me.


Is this your first time on DCUM? You will be crying soon if you stay. You know what your mom told you growing up, that nobody notices but you? They notice. And they post here. Good luck.


I meant in real life, as distinct (very distinct) from DCUM. Everything I do is wrong, according to DCUM. And yet somehow I manage to go on.



The posters on DCUM are from real life. They just don't say it out loud IRL. FYI....


I don't think they're from my real life, actually. But even if they are, why would I care what they think of me? I mean that in all seriousness.


Because you are human. Nice try though.


New poster, here, but I also feel like I don't care what most people think of me. I'm not pretending I'm immune to other people's opinions, but I don't weigh the opinion of a stranger or of a person I don't respect like it's equal to the opinion of my spouse or good friends. I really do not care what strangers think of me. If someone who doesn't really know my life wants to judge me because I let my toddler eat Cheerios or we did sleep training or whatever...fine. I mean, really, how does that affect me? If someone is silently judging me, let them. As long as they are well-mannered enough to keep it to themselves, it just doesn't matter.
Anonymous
I don't care what strangers think of me either. If someone disapproves of me for formula-feeding or for my kid wearing a regular swimsuit (ha), it makes me question their judgment, not mine.

One thing I've learned on DCUM is that a lot of people long for close friendships. I guess if you don't have that, you find community wherever you can, and if it that is mean DCUM it probably makes you feel pretty bad.
Anonymous
Non parents are often more judgmental. It's nothing new or related to DC. People just like to judge others and feel superior from afar.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I don't care what strangers think of me either. If someone disapproves of me for formula-feeding or for my kid wearing a regular swimsuit (ha), it makes me question their judgment, not mine.

One thing I've learned on DCUM is that a lot of people long for close friendships. I guess if you don't have that, you find community wherever you can, and if it that is mean DCUM it probably makes you feel pretty bad.


I see that, too. And I wonder if the people longing for close friendships are also the people secretly judging others for things that don't really matter.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:

People may be judging me by my home, car, children's school, children's activities, job, and income -- but if they are, they're being extremely discreet about it. Or I'm extremely good at denial. One way or the other, it's working for me.


Is this your first time on DCUM? You will be crying soon if you stay. You know what your mom told you growing up, that nobody notices but you? They notice. And they post here. Good luck.


I meant in real life, as distinct (very distinct) from DCUM. Everything I do is wrong, according to DCUM. And yet somehow I manage to go on.



The posters on DCUM are from real life. They just don't say it out loud IRL. FYI....


I don't think they're from my real life, actually. But even if they are, why would I care what they think of me? I mean that in all seriousness.


Because you are human. Nice try though.


New poster, here, but I also feel like I don't care what most people think of me. I'm not pretending I'm immune to other people's opinions, but I don't weigh the opinion of a stranger or of a person I don't respect like it's equal to the opinion of my spouse or good friends. I really do not care what strangers think of me. If someone who doesn't really know my life wants to judge me because I let my toddler eat Cheerios or we did sleep training or whatever...fine. I mean, really, how does that affect me? If someone is silently judging me, let them. As long as they are well-mannered enough to keep it to themselves, it just doesn't matter.


Of course. This is what I meant and it is a far cry from not caring what other people think. We all care to some degree. It is normal to care.
Anonymous
OP, it's "judgmental," not "judgemental."
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Own your life.


This. Thank you madam. Or sir.


+1
Anonymous
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are. ~ Anais Nin
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:OP, it's "judgmental," not "judgemental."


Feel free to judge me for my poor spelling.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Own your life.


This. Thank you madam. Or sir.


+1


Own what? I own that I love being able to distract my kids with a little screen time used judiciously? I definitely own that!

Does that give people the right to dispense with civility and behave badly? I think not. If someone has a problem with someone or I was offending them, they should either said something to my face if or just STFU. Looking directly towards me and whispering to her husband who then turned to look is just rude.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Own your life.


This. Thank you madam. Or sir.


+1


Own what? I own that I love being able to distract my kids with a little screen time used judiciously? I definitely own that!

Does that give people the right to dispense with civility and behave badly? I think not. If someone has a problem with someone or I was offending them, they should either said something to my face if or just STFU. Looking directly towards me and whispering to her husband who then turned to look is just rude.


There were two moms at our former preschool once who whispered to each other behind the screen of the preschool graduation program held up to their mouths. I will never forget the image. What B-hags.

OP, maybe the wife was saying, "See? I told you other people let their kids watch movies in restaurants." Is that possible?
Anonymous
OP, if you were not already feeling guilty/self conscious about giving them the phone, you wouldn't have noticed the woman whispering. Your senses were heightened.
Anonymous
Well if it bothered you that much, maybe there was some truth behind her remark...To be honest, I roll my eyes at everyone who can not even spend the time it takes to eat dinner/lunch/watch a movie in the theater/wait for their order to be finished/insert more daily activities here without pulling out their phone. I would have looked at you weird too. I wouldn't have said anything, but to me phones (or any screens) don't belong where social gathering takes place.

You might not like that attitude, but you will have to deal with it. Just as I don't like people pulling out their phones every 5 seconds, but I have to deal with it. These are just the ways we all deal with stuff that annoys us.
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