Found 2 movie tickets on bf, should I approach him?

[Anonymous]

I think it could have been someone innocent - mother or sister.

The fact that you say you are jealous and that he has to ask your permission to see a movie make you sound very controlling. It could have been that he just didn't want to deal with your 100 questions or get your permission so he lied.

And the text - are you napping and his reply yes - that is a weird text exchange. If he is napping, how could he reply yes? And why would you ask someone if they are sleeping? If they are they can't respond.

Or he could be cheating.

[Anonymous]

Sorry but it sounds like he's cheating. If he went with his mom or sister he would have brought you along or at least mentioned it since he knew you wanted to see it. The "nap" was a good cover.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you figured out the date? Was it a weeknight or a weekend? Any recollection of where you thought he was, or where you were?

It was 2/16. Around v day obviously around 7:30. I'm pissed inside. I want to go off but I'm keeping my cool because I don't want to over react. I'm naturally a very jealous person.

Look, I'd be annoyed if my partner/boyfriend/husband went to a movie AT ALL and didn't mention it. "Hey, Rick and I are going to catch that war flick on Sunday, any objections?" or "My mom wants me to go to that comedy with her" so just to let you know I won't be around Friday night." You are completely justified in your feelings here, is my point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think she should just say she saw the tickets and ask who he went with. Why all the subterfuge?

Completely agree. If you need to engage in subterfuge rather than the direct ask you have trouble in your relationship anyway.

Just out of curiosity, cheating aside, do people really have partners who go to the movies and don't mention it? Some folks are like, yeah maybe he took his mom. Well. sure, but wouldn't that come up in the course of normal couple's conversation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you figured out the date? Was it a weeknight or a weekend? Any recollection of where you thought he was, or where you were?

It was 2/16. Around v day obviously around 7:30. I'm pissed inside. I want to go off but I'm keeping my cool because I don't want to over react. I'm naturally a very jealous person.

Look, I'd be annoyed if my partner/boyfriend/husband went to a movie AT ALL and didn't mention it. "Hey, Rick and I are going to catch that war flick on Sunday, any objections?" or "My mom wants me to go to that comedy with her" so just to let you know I won't be around Friday night." You are completely justified in your feelings here, is my point.

I'd totally break up with a woman who expected me to get permission to make plans like that. OMG.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you figured out the date? Was it a weeknight or a weekend? Any recollection of where you thought he was, or where you were?

It was 2/16. Around v day obviously around 7:30. I'm pissed inside. I want to go off but I'm keeping my cool because I don't want to over react. I'm naturally a very jealous person.

Look, I'd be annoyed if my partner/boyfriend/husband went to a movie AT ALL and didn't mention it. "Hey, Rick and I are going to catch that war flick on Sunday, any objections?" or "My mom wants me to go to that comedy with her" so just to let you know I won't be around Friday night." You are completely justified in your feelings here, is my point.

I'd totally break up with a woman who expected me to get permission to make plans like that. OMG.

Just like a man to think that information is the same as "permission." All the pp had said was "mention it."

[Anonymous]

Don't be direct. If he's cheating he'll just have a chance to come up with a lie. I like the idea of saying you want to see the movie and see what he says. Do it in person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Have you figured out the date? Was it a weeknight or a weekend? Any recollection of where you thought he was, or where you were?

It was 2/16. Around v day obviously around 7:30. I'm pissed inside. I want to go off but I'm keeping my cool because I don't want to over react. I'm naturally a very jealous person.

Look, I'd be annoyed if my partner/boyfriend/husband went to a movie AT ALL and didn't mention it. "Hey, Rick and I are going to catch that war flick on Sunday, any objections?" or "My mom wants me to go to that comedy with her" so just to let you know I won't be around Friday night." You are completely justified in your feelings here, is my point.

I'd totally break up with a woman who expected me to get permission to make plans like that. OMG.

Just like a man to think that information is the same as "permission." All the pp had said was "mention it."

Yes, PP did say "mention it." But PP gave a poor example with the war flick scenario. Those two words "any objections?" killed it for me, and I'm a woman. THAT sounded like a request for permission. The language used around taking the mom to the movies was perfect.

[Anonymous]

How about an update, OP?

[Anonymous]

To the permission people, I have been married for 15 years, and inform my wife of my plans. I will give her a chance to object, and may change my plans, but I did not ask permission before going to fla for spring training & to help my father.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think she should just say she saw the tickets and ask who he went with. Why all the subterfuge?

Completely agree. If you need to engage in subterfuge rather than the direct ask you have trouble in your relationship anyway.

Just out of curiosity, cheating aside, do people really have partners who go to the movies and don't mention it? Some folks are like, yeah maybe he took his mom. Well. sure, but wouldn't that come up in the course of normal couple's conversation?[b]

+1.

[Anonymous]

OP here. I didn't read through the post but thought you all deserve an update. We went out to eat and he asked if something was on my mind and I said yes. I said I saw two movie tickets on his dresser, and with whom did he go with? He said what tickets? And I told him the movie name, date and time. Side note, he has room mates. He said they aren't his and probably his room mates. I said but why on your dresser? Side note again, he has a bunch of crap on his dresser, papers and everything. He said he probably put it in his pocket, and then put it on the dresser. I told him I went through text and around that time, he said he was asleep. He once again said, they aren't his. We get back to the car after dinner and of course we are silent. He said I'm snooping. I decided to just say ok fine, I believe you. I don't know what else to do or say and I have to believe him, right? I feel like I was prepared for him to say it was with a friend, I didn't think he would say they aren't mine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:To the permission people, I have been married for 15 years, and inform my wife of my plans. I will give her a chance to object, and may change my plans, but I did not ask permission before going to fla for spring training & to help my father.

You're married. OP just has a boyfriend. Totally different level of partnership.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think it could have been someone innocent - mother or sister.

The fact that you say you are jealous and that he has to ask your permission to see a movie make you sound very controlling. It could have been that he just didn't want to deal with your 100 questions or get your permission so he lied.

And the text - are you napping and his reply yes - that is a weird text exchange. If he is napping, how could he reply yes? And why would you ask someone if they are sleeping? If they are they can't respond.

Or he could be cheating.

OP here. He doesn't need my permission to go to the movies. I never said that.... I sent him a text, and got no reply. An hour later I ask, "are you napping?" And about an hour later he replies, "yes" as in he was napping. I am in my twenties, we text a lot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I didn't read through the post but thought you all deserve an update. We went out to eat and he asked if something was on my mind and I said yes. I said I saw two movie tickets on his dresser, and with whom did he go with? He said what tickets? And I told him the movie name, date and time. Side note, he has room mates. He said they aren't his and probably his room mates. I said but why on your dresser? Side note again, he has a bunch of crap on his dresser, papers and everything. He said he probably put it in his pocket, and then put it on the dresser. I told him I went through text and around that time, he said he was asleep. He once again said, they aren't his. We get back to the car after dinner and of course we are silent. He said I'm snooping. I decided to just say ok fine, I believe you. I don't know what else to do or say and I have to believe him, right? I feel like I was prepared for him to say it was with a friend, I didn't think he would say they aren't mine.

Eh. Should've read through the posts first. You spoke too soon. One of the suggested conversations here, particularly mine (hehe), would've been better.