What does your husband think/say when you gain weight

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gosh, this is a funny thread. I come as a single guy to DCUM for local scoop but fell in here. You all think your DH "doesn't care?" To hell he doesn't. Look out for "late night" projects and business trips, ladies. Not to be a MCP or anything, we understand childbirth and all that, and getting older, but let me tell you this. A slim (ish) woman we were initialy attracted to who gains a lot of weight is about the equivalent of of the six foot tall man you married shrinking down to 4'8" over the course of months. Would that guy make you nervous and wet? Didn't think so. Think about it.

I think this is pretty realistic.

[Anonymous]

My husband literally tells me a few days ago "mmmmm you have the perfect body baby". Then lastnight as im trying something on for him says "ooohhh you really need to cut out the pops n breads" as he's looking at my stomach! I really hate him right now. I get tired of his wishy washy behavior! I've gained about 10 lbs since we met 8 years ago, mind you I was about 170 back then and he had recently broke up with a girl that weighed almost 300lbs, obviously he loved it bc when we got together he said he wanted me to gain like 50 more lbs. But for the last few years he's made some really rude comments towards me. Also this comes from a man who is also over weight and can eat an entire cheesecake on his own.

[Anonymous]

I'm 5'9", when we married I was 140#s. After the second baby I soared to 185# for about 3 years. With a lot of hard work, I'm back down to a very tone and fit 145#s and will never creep higher than 150.

My DH said NOTHING. Of course he wants to get laid and is smart enough to keep his trap shut. he made me think it did not bother him. However now that I'm fit he's like a 18yr old boy trying to hump my leg every free chance he gets.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband doesn't touch my weight with a 10 foot pole. That said, I have been a thin person throughout our relationship, fluctuating only by about 10 pounds, and even then I wear the same clothes. I was 115 5'6'' at my thinnest with him, and about 125 now.

Recently, I have gained about five pounds. This shows, to me, in my stomach area. I can pooch out a good deal of flab if I want to, and I am not comfortable wearing thin + tight shirts (because the silhouette they create, with my tighter-than-usual pants, isn't pleasant). I wouldn't wear a bikini today.

My husband HAS reacted quietly, I think. Thought he hasn't initiated conversation, when I state that I want to lose a few lbs, he says he will not comment because whatever he says is wrong. He has raised the issue of "too much candy" both for our child's benefit, and because "we are getting older and I promise you that however skinny you can be now while eating all the sweets you eat, when you turn 35 that won't be the case anymore." -- I'm not 35 yet. I eat a shitton of candy.

I recently got exercise equipment at home. He said last night, while I was talking about how excited I was to use it, that "I'm not saying you need to lose weight, you don't, and you look the same to me, but I bet you if you just cut out some candy you can achieve whatever small goals you have without doing anything else." To me this intimates, "Yep, you'd look/feel better 5 lbs thinner, so go ahead, get 5 lbs thinner."

He's sweet, meek, and I imagine would hate it if I truly got fat or really unfit. But I don't think I will. And I don't think he will either, despite him having a heavy parent.

All this over 5lbs?

[Anonymous]

Not really, he's gained a lot more weight than I have and he complains/talks about that a lot. A lot of people comment on it too, which I find weird. I think he would like me to return to pre-twins size (as would I), but he would never say that. I don't complain too much about it though, and I never mention it in front of my kids. He compliments me a lot, which is sweet but it's probably because he wants me to have sex with him.

[Anonymous]

He says nothing unless I mention it. When I do, he tells me he loves me and that I'm beautiful (even though I gained 40 lbs in 3 years of depression and infertility treatments)

He does buy healthy food and helps me plan healthy meals. He encourages me to exercise by asking me to go on walks with him. I know he will be supportive in helping me get healthy again once I have this baby.

Sometimes I wonder if I would have gained less weight if I didn't feel so accepted and unconditionally loved by him, but I know that's not true and I'm the only one responsible for my current state.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He doesn't say anything (he prefers me at a curvy /big boobed size 10 than a skinny size 4). In the past when I've gained weight or gone up to a 12, I tell DH i want to go on a diet /exercise plan, he agrees and says we'll work on it together. He's also put on about 20 pounds in the last 2 years so he usually wants to work on it too.

That said, DS is 2 months old and I'm about 10 pounds lighter than my pre -pregnancy weight. Can definitely tell DH's increased attraction [b]when we have sexy time

[/b

Lol hi Borat

[Anonymous]

Nada.

[Anonymous]

He's smart enough to say nothing. Gained 10 Winter pounds. Sex is off the charts freaky great. So, so stressed that I honestly require near daily sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here: yea, this is totally embarrassing but I have gained a lot of weight. I was 125 (I am 5'6") when we started dating (very fit). When I turned 30 I was at my (then highest) 150. But still like a 4, sometimes 6. I worked out a lot.

Got preggs went up to 200. Had the kid went down to 155...and then I have gained like 10 lbs/year for the last year. Which puts me where I am now at 190 or so.

So, short answer...I have gained 45 lbs since just after we got married 5 years ago. OMG...THAT IS SO BAD. I have not sat down and thought about it like that.

Op- similar weight gain to yours in five years of marriage so you're not alone. Sucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:A lot of you are delusional. Surprise - your husbands DO CARE when you gain weight (except for the skinnies here).

This! Any ladies reading this forum are not married to Joey-6-pack-Budweiser.
Trust me these men DO notice. You might lie to yourself and think he doesn't care.
He DOES care, even if he doesn't say this.

[Anonymous]

Doesn't make any comments.
We just had a baby and I haven't lost any.I've put on some weight actually.
If it were up to him, we would have sex every day.Has no problem getting it on...
He is not the kind to comment on how somebody looks.

[Anonymous]

Absolutely nothing. God bless him

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband actually likes the weight gain and the bigger breasts and butt that has resulted. He seems to totally ignore the bigger gut and thighs that came with the package.

He does not like when I get too slim; thinks I look like a teen girl (which is partly true). Still, my plan is to lose 30 lbs which should put me at a sweet spot (thick, but not chubby).

Mine is the same. He would never ever comment on my body other than to tell me it's beautiful and sexy. I hate the way my body looks now that I've had two kids, but he loves it. He once saw a picture of me in college when I was 30-40 pounds lighter and was shocked. He asked where my boobs were and said he liked my body so much better this way.

He does want me to be happy with my body and is supportive of me exercising and trying to lose some of the weight, as long as I'm being healthy about it. But that's because he wants me to feel good, not because he thinks I need to lose weight.

[Anonymous]

I was fat to begin with and I am within 10 lbs of what I weighed when we were dating.

I lost the pregnancy weight wo trying.

He teases me about my pudge, but its not mean. He loves me for who I am.

He says he hates bony hips-they hurt during sex. All his exes were skinny. I never was.