My 4-yr old son obsessed w/girl stuff-IS IT NORMAL??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I had a neighbor like this (posted this in the thread below about the one son playing with all girls) and he is now gay too. But this is probably just a phase, so I wouldn't worry about it.

What does the dad think?

OP here again. That's just it, no dad. We're a 2 mom household, & I wonder if that is playing a role. Of course, we are the last to judge, we just worry about bullying, etc, down the road.

Very interesting.... could he be displaying more obvious gender confusion due to a lack of a male role model?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:"Guy" and "woman here"...you're cut from the same cloth and you both suck hard.

please explain why? I am not anti-gay in the least. if my son was gay, whatever. this has nothing to do with homosexuality. just saying I wouldn't want my son to wear a princess costume because I KNOW the reaction in his community would be negative. he can wear whatever he wants at home, and he can be as creative as he likes. but part of my job as a parent is to protect my child from the big bad world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here. I would definitely gently encourage my son away from that sort of thing. why invite ridicule and make life harder than it is. and zero chance he is wearing a princess costume for halloween! you kidding me?
not talking about whether or not he comes out as gay when he is 22. talking about wearing all pink or frilly dresses when he is 5 or 6.

Seriously, you are the reason I'm glad I'm gay and do not have to worry about raising my child with a man.

Moms, you're doing a great job. Kids are kids are kids, and they will express themselves in a million different ways - regardless of who their parents are. If you haven't already seen it, check out labelsareforjars.wordpress.com - great blog by a two mom family with a gender varient kid.

In all fairness to SOME men, my DH is extremely supportive of my son's love of pink and other things "girly." In fact, when I was uncomfortable that my son wanted to go out carrying his pink poodle purse and with his fingernails painted, my husband told me not to worry about what other people think. I do get uncomfortable when people stare at us but we are not willing to compromise our belief in our son's right to express himself the way that he chooses.

This has to be a troll....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here. I would definitely gently encourage my son away from that sort of thing. why invite ridicule and make life harder than it is. and zero chance he is wearing a princess costume for halloween! you kidding me?
not talking about whether or not he comes out as gay when he is 22. talking about wearing all pink or frilly dresses when he is 5 or 6.

Seriously, you are the reason I'm glad I'm gay and do not have to worry about raising my child with a man.

Moms, you're doing a great job. Kids are kids are kids, and they will express themselves in a million different ways - regardless of who their parents are. If you haven't already seen it, check out labelsareforjars.wordpress.com - great blog by a two mom family with a gender varient kid.

In all fairness to SOME men, my DH is extremely supportive of my son's love of pink and other things "girly." In fact, when I was uncomfortable that my son wanted to go out carrying his pink poodle purse and with his fingernails painted, my husband told me not to worry about what other people think. I do get uncomfortable when people stare at us but we are not willing to compromise our belief in our son's right to express himself the way that he chooses.

This has to be a troll....

That's funny but I'm not a troll. I swear! DH is for real.

[Anonymous]

15:44 here,

No, I will not suffer with my kids because they have been learning to listen to YES and NO since they were born. But those of you who let your kids do whatever they want are totally screwed. The time will show it. Listen, my daughter plays with my my son's cars and trucks and my son loves to play with her little kitchen's stuff. no problem at all! But some of you guys let it go out of control...wtf??? why should a 2 year old little fuck decide what she/he want s to wear??? I am the one who buy the clothes and whatever I think it is ridiculous, indecent, inappropriate or even too expensive for me I won't buy it! If my son wants to wear princess clothes, polish nail or whatever is way too girly, he can do that!!! but once he is the one responsible to buy it...when he is not under MY CARE, when he is not dependent on my salary...once he is independent, he is free to give his ass on the corner...

[Anonymous]

Oh goodness, this is a tough one.

I think a lot of DH's probably think like 'Guy' and I know my DH does and I know he would not let DS go out in a princess outfit on Halloween. My DS used to like to wear my shoes when he was 2, but he also liked DH's shoes and he liked my costume jewelry and we never had an issue with him wearing it, but it was mostly just around the home or maybe in the yard.

I understand 'Guy' when he says that he doesn't want his son to be ridiculed. Who wants their child to be hurt and ridiculed, especially if it can be prevented by not wearing a certain costume or item. How would you all feel if you son came home crying because the other kids made fun of him? Wouldn't it break your heart? It would totally tear me up to see my child like this. All the explaining in the world is not going to change the way the other kids or even parents' will react.

In regards to how our children will feel towards us once they are grown, I don't think anyone can predict that outcome. I have a friend who has an extremely strained relationship with her daughter (18) and she was a mom who was very open, permissive and accepting. The two of them hardly speak and her daughter resents the fact that there was not more structure and stability in her life. But I also know from experience that growing up in controlling environment can lead to low self-esteem and timidness. Traits that are not helpful in life at all. I don't think there is a perfect way of raising a child. We all make mistakes and we do the best we can.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guy here. I would definitely gently encourage my son away from that sort of thing. why invite ridicule and make life harder than it is. and zero chance he is wearing a princess costume for halloween! you kidding me?
not talking about whether or not he comes out as gay when he is 22. talking about wearing all pink or frilly dresses when he is 5 or 6.

Seriously, you are the reason I'm glad I'm gay and do not have to worry about raising my child with a man.

Moms, you're doing a great job. Kids are kids are kids, and they will express themselves in a million different ways - regardless of who their parents are. If you haven't already seen it, check out labelsareforjars.wordpress.com - great blog by a two mom family with a gender varient kid.

There's hope - my husband is nothing like the loon who posted above.

[Anonymous]

This is the PP with the son who used to have a poodle purse. I am not a permissive parent. I am a parent who believes that children should be encouraged to be who they are. There is a big difference. Also, my son did not wear monkey costumes or dresses to school. He had a poodle purse which he liked a lot and sometimes he took it with him when we went shopping or to dinner. He was really little at the time. He also liked when his sister painted his nails. I don't think it's a big deal. We did allow him to wear pink shirts to school which he bought in the boy department at the GAP- also not a big deal. I think parents can get really crazy when it comes to this stuff. My son is older now and he no longer carries a purse but he still likes pink. It's a nice color, simple as that. It's really only judgmental, narrow-minded people who make any of this a problem and they are the ones teaching their kids to think that way. Also, my son has turned out to be pretty macho but I would have been just as proud and happy if he were gay or trans or whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: Also, my son has turned out to be pretty macho

That's not a good thing though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:15:44 here,

No, I will not suffer with my kids because they have been learning to listen to YES and NO since they were born. But those of you who let your kids do whatever they want are totally screwed. The time will show it. Listen, my daughter plays with my my son's cars and trucks and my son loves to play with her little kitchen's stuff. no problem at all! But some of you guys let it go out of control...wtf??? why should a 2 year old little fuck decide what she/he want s to wear??? I am the one who buy the clothes and whatever I think it is ridiculous, indecent, inappropriate or even too expensive for me I won't buy it! If my son wants to wear princess clothes, polish nail or whatever is way too girly, he can do that!!! but once he is the one responsible to buy it...when he is not under MY CARE, when he is not dependent on my salary...once he is independent, he is free to give his ass on the corner...

"2 year old little fuck"? Can't imagine the type of parent that would refer to their child this way. I feel sorry for your children, PP. You sound like my parents, and I can tell you know that they are spending their senior years all alone with no contact from their 3 children and our children as a result.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:15:44 here,

No, I will not suffer with my kids because they have been learning to listen to YES and NO since they were born. But those of you who let your kids do whatever they want are totally screwed. The time will show it. Listen, my daughter plays with my my son's cars and trucks and my son loves to play with her little kitchen's stuff. no problem at all! But some of you guys let it go out of control...wtf??? why should a 2 year old little fuck decide what she/he want s to wear??? I am the one who buy the clothes and whatever I think it is ridiculous, indecent, inappropriate or even too expensive for me I won't buy it! If my son wants to wear princess clothes, polish nail or whatever is way too girly, he can do that!!! but once he is the one responsible to buy it...when he is not under MY CARE, when he is not dependent on my salary...once he is independent, he is free to give his ass on the corner...

"2 year old little fuck"? Can't imagine the type of parent that would refer to their child this way. I feel sorry for your children, PP. You sound like my parents, and I can tell you know that they are spending their senior years all alone with no contact from their 3 children and our children as a result.

No, you are wrong. I am not referring to my children. I am referring as little fuckers to your children. All those spoiled brats are little fuckers whose parents are big fuckers for letting them do whatever they want to, even when it doesn't make any sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Also, my son has turned out to be pretty macho

That's not a good thing though.

I think I just used the wrong word. I should have said that he behaves in a way which is more stereotypically masculine. He is still really sweet and plays well with both boys and girls. He doesn't reject his feminine side at all but he is expressing a more masculine side now. As I said, either way is fine with me and DH.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:15:44 here,

No, I will not suffer with my kids because they have been learning to listen to YES and NO since they were born. But those of you who let your kids do whatever they want are totally screwed. The time will show it. Listen, my daughter plays with my my son's cars and trucks and my son loves to play with her little kitchen's stuff. no problem at all! But some of you guys let it go out of control...wtf??? why should a 2 year old little fuck decide what she/he want s to wear??? I am the one who buy the clothes and whatever I think it is ridiculous, indecent, inappropriate or even too expensive for me I won't buy it! If my son wants to wear princess clothes, polish nail or whatever is way too girly, he can do that!!! but once he is the one responsible to buy it...when he is not under MY CARE, when he is not dependent on my salary...once he is independent, he is free to give his ass on the corner...

"2 year old little fuck"? Can't imagine the type of parent that would refer to their child this way. I feel sorry for your children, PP. You sound like my parents, and I can tell you know that they are spending their senior years all alone with no contact from their 3 children and our children as a result.

No, you are wrong. I am not referring to my children. I am referring as little fuckers to your children. All those spoiled brats are little fuckers whose parents are big fuckers for letting them do whatever they want to, even when it doesn't make any sense.

I understand your point of view, but you are insane. The children of people you disagree with are little fucks? Your kids will need all kinds of therapy. Though I suspect you don't have kids, and that you are a troll. Well, I hope that you don't have kids.

[Anonymous]

ROFLMAO I refer to my children as little fuckers, not in front of them but with my husband. relax people!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote: Also, my son has turned out to be pretty macho

That's not a good thing though.

I think I just used the wrong word. I should have said that he behaves in a way which is more stereotypically masculine. He is still really sweet and plays well with both boys and girls. He doesn't reject his feminine side at all but he is expressing a more masculine side now. As I said, either way is fine with me and DH.

He is "still sweet" even though he is "stereotypically masculine." Heck no, you are not narrow minded and judgmental. Only people who dont' let their boys dress up as princesses on Halloween are. You are open to all kinds of ideas about masculinity and femininity. Okeeeee..