Wife is trying to “optimize” future kids’ birth months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The only people I know who think this much about this topic are teachers. I know many of us try to time our births to maximize our time off with the baby. I had mine in mid April which meant I didn't have to return to school that school year. I had off from mid April until late August.

Military wives. One of my friends ended up having a child shortly after PCS’ing and had to bring the baby back to temporary housing. That sucked. I have two summer babies and got used to arriving somewhere and meeting new neighbors by saying “we don’t actually know you but my kids birthday is next week and he really wants a party so are you free?” It was a bit challenging at the time but led to some good friendships and in retrospect really wasn’t that big a deal. OP’s wife needs to calm down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your wife sounds immature and exhausting. Your poor fetus.

+1

[Anonymous]

that is A LOT

[Anonymous]

School cut offs vary by state, but the vast majority have cut offs in September, so if you are born soon after the cut off you end up on the older side. In most states, a late Oct bday makes a kid one of the oldest in the class. And in most states an Aug bday makes you among the youngest, unless you redshirt.

Hope that helps.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like pregnancy might have triggered a mental health issue with your wife. It'll most like get significantly worse once your baby arrives. Be careful.

[Anonymous]

I really didn't like having an October baby because he was tiny all through respiratory virus season. He got both strains of RSV before he was two months old. I didn't even know RSV had an A strain and a B strain! This was pre vaccine so maybe this would be less stressful now.

I actually liked March. The viruses are starting to wind down and by the time you get out of the hibernation period of newbornhood the weather is starting to get nice. April would probably be even better for that.

I also have an August baby and it was fine for pregnancy/babyhood but as others have said you then have to decide if you want to redshirt and that's stressful. 😆

[Anonymous]

Warm weather birthday parties are SO MUCH CHEAPER for little kids. My kids are November/January and I get really jealous when we're invited to the local playground for a bday party where all the parents did was set up a card table to put the cake on and buy a bunch of balloons.

Of course it doesn't really matter at all. Just the only thing I thought of when I read (the first half of, tbh) the OP. Hey: at least this doesn't seem astrology-driven! She could be crazier!

[Anonymous]

This has to be a troll....been a lot of them here lately.

[Anonymous]

I thought about this stuff too. Not all of what your wife is thinking (girl or boyish months?), but much of it. We aimed for spring babies and actively tried for a due date anywhere between February to June. I didn't really want to be super pregnant in the heat of summer and I have really bad fall allergies, so I didn't want to be struggling against an allergy attack while trying to enjoy my newborn. We have two April kiddos (one was due in March and the other in May).

One thing I didn't think about until after I had my first, but fall also means that you've got an infant at the height of flu season. My oldest was born in a particularly bad flu year that lasted into the early spring, so my hospital was still limiting visitors even in early April (and this was pre-pandemic). There are lots of benefits to fall birthdays (being the oldest in your class, often beautiful weather for outdoor birthday parties, etc), so I wouldn't let the flu turn you off of the season altogether. It was just something I thought about after the fact.

I have a friend who was so into birth month that she was a March due date or bust person. When they missed the window for a March due date, they just didn't try again until the next year. That's excessive. If we had missed the spring window we wanted, we just wouldn't have tried so hard the rest of the year, but we still would have welcomed a pregnancy at any time.

By all means, aim for a season, if it matters to your wife, but (as you'll learn when your first kid is born) part of becoming a parent is learning to be flexible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I really didn't like having an October baby because he was tiny all through respiratory virus season. He got both strains of RSV before he was two months old. I didn't even know RSV had an A strain and a B strain! This was pre vaccine so maybe this would be less stressful now.

I actually liked March. The viruses are starting to wind down and by the time you get out of the hibernation period of newbornhood the weather is starting to get nice. April would probably be even better for that.

I also have an August baby and it was fine for pregnancy/babyhood but as others have said you then have to decide if you want to redshirt and that's stressful. 😆

I've got an April kid and it's great. But three of her six outdoor park birthday parties have had to pivot to a house party at the last minute because they've been rained out. No month is perfect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Warm weather birthday parties are SO MUCH CHEAPER for little kids. My kids are November/January and I get really jealous when we're invited to the local playground for a bday party where all the parents did was set up a card table to put the cake on and buy a bunch of balloons.

Of course it doesn't really matter at all. Just the only thing I thought of when I read (the first half of, tbh) the OP. Hey: at least this doesn't seem astrology-driven! She could be crazier!

I have a January kid and his birthday has been snowed out a couple times. My mom also had her initial flight to come visit initially canceled by snow.

It's annoying but it really isn't a big pain. My other kid was born in July which meant I had heat waves to deal with when he was little. Again, pros and cons to that, but in the grand scheme of things it's not really a big deal.

[Anonymous]

My child was supposed to be born in March, born in early February.

The things about winter birthday parties, every single person will come! There is nothing to complete with your birthday party! My child had great winter parties with all their friends at our home, rec center, bowling.....

You really just want a healthy child.

Lastly, I wasn't trying for any particular month. Nor was my sister. We both had winter babies. Most of the children in our family were born in winter! Is there some genetic component?

[Anonymous]

Whatever, my kid was born in August, was not redshirted, has lots of friends, loves her birthday, is very strong academically, and has never had any negative effects from having an August birthday.

The only negative I can think of was that I was at my most pregnant in the hottest weeks of the year, but that was a long time ago and who cares now.

If having the "wrong" birthday is going to hold your kid back, my suggestion is don't have kids at all because you can't handle it. Grow up.

[Anonymous]

Yeah well, man plans and god laughs. This is such a DINK think to spend one’s time obsessing over. Most people can’t just snap their fingers and conceive a child exactly when and how they planned it. I hope it’s easy for her though.

[Anonymous]

+1 This is crazy and not something you can plan for.

Just came in here to say that January is just fine. The child will be towards the older/middle end of the class which is good for maturity, sports, test scores etc. January birthdays also make it easy to count years as they line up with the calendar year.