Say something to store manager or just keep quiet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why were you rude or weirded out?

There is an elderly woman who works at the front desk of my gym and scans me in most mornings. If I ran into her at Wegmans, what that man said to you would similarly be applicable to how I feel about this woman: she is so nice and kind in our brief daily words, and I think it would feel endearing to hear the same from her. It means connection.

You were the rude and weird one.

Next time ask for help if you need it.

He meant it in a romantic way. Not in a friendly way.

DP. He obviously crossed boundaries when he told OP “I think about you a lot”. Store employees should not say that to customers.
That is not kindness. It is inappropriate.

For this isolated interaction, I would leave it alone, I would not try to jeopardize his job by speaking to supervisor.
Re not being helped, again if there is pattern that you never get help anymore, I would speak up.
But I suspect after the initial awkwardness, he will start to behave like a normal employee.

If not, then say something if there are 2-3 more instances where things are still not normal.

+1

[Anonymous]

Women spend billions of dollars on products & services in hopes that men will notice them. When they actually notice them, “Holy crap, where’s the manager? This psycho should be locked up!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone else find the OP's behavior strange or is it just me?

It's really strange how often people project their own unhealed issues onto others, only to then portray themselves as victims of their own projections. The employee may have been a little socially awkward or had a crush; neither of these is harmful. However, OP's overreaction and the idea of reporting him are just ridiculous. He didn't do anything wrong.

[Anonymous]

How did you get the water into your cart? Did you lift it?

[Anonymous]

Am I the only one who thinks him ignoring her at the store adds to how creepy he is? I don't read this as politely backing off at all. I read it as taking the rejection out on her.

But then I've also had a stalker. If OP is creeped out, she absolutely needs to trust her gut and go to a different store.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who thinks him ignoring her at the store adds to how creepy he is? I don't read this as politely backing off at all. I read it as taking the rejection out on her.

But then I've also had a stalker. If OP is creeped out, she absolutely needs to trust her gut and go to a different store.

I totally disagree with you and I’m wondering what you think appropriate behavior would be? Maybe he was backing off because she blew him off outside of work (he didn’t approach her at his job despite having plenty of opportunity) perhaps he was respecting her boundary by waiting to see if she asked for help (which she didn’t). Even if he was interested in her he did everything correctly 1) approached her outside of the work environment and 2) picked up on her rejection and allowed her to set the boundaries (not asking him for help) other than simply not existing in her presence what exactly is this man supposed to do? And FYI OP most definitely had a friendly relationship with this employee at some point, even if it was just casual hello/how are you at the store she has clearly spoken with him in the past.

[Anonymous]

How fugly are you OP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who thinks him ignoring her at the store adds to how creepy he is? I don't read this as politely backing off at all. I read it as taking the rejection out on her.

But then I've also had a stalker. If OP is creeped out, she absolutely needs to trust her gut and go to a different store.

I totally disagree with you and I’m wondering what you think appropriate behavior would be? Maybe he was backing off because she blew him off outside of work (he didn’t approach her at his job despite having plenty of opportunity) perhaps he was respecting her boundary by waiting to see if she asked for help (which she didn’t). Even if he was interested in her he did everything correctly 1) approached her outside of the work environment and 2) picked up on her rejection and allowed her to set the boundaries (not asking him for help) other than simply not existing in her presence what exactly is this man supposed to do? And FYI OP most definitely had a friendly relationship with this employee at some point, even if it was just casual hello/how are you at the store she has clearly spoken with him in the past.

He was supposed to help her with the water as per his job description and the fact she's not supposed to put it on the scanner. If everything was a totally innocent misunderstanding, he should do his job despite awkwardness or at least go get someone else to help her. Ignoring her is emotionally immature.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who thinks him ignoring her at the store adds to how creepy he is? I don't read this as politely backing off at all. I read it as taking the rejection out on her.

But then I've also had a stalker. If OP is creeped out, she absolutely needs to trust her gut and go to a different store.

I totally disagree with you and I’m wondering what you think appropriate behavior would be? Maybe he was backing off because she blew him off outside of work (he didn’t approach her at his job despite having plenty of opportunity) perhaps he was respecting her boundary by waiting to see if she asked for help (which she didn’t). Even if he was interested in her he did everything correctly 1) approached her outside of the work environment and 2) picked up on her rejection and allowed her to set the boundaries (not asking him for help) other than simply not existing in her presence what exactly is this man supposed to do? And FYI OP most definitely had a friendly relationship with this employee at some point, even if it was just casual hello/how are you at the store she has clearly spoken with him in the past.

He was supposed to help her with the water as per his job description and the fact she's not supposed to put it on the scanner. If everything was a totally innocent misunderstanding, he should do his job despite awkwardness or at least go get someone else to help her. Ignoring her is emotionally immature.

Well, he needs to be fired and blackballed. Prison can't come soon enough.

[Anonymous]

Light this beta on fire please

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How did you get the water into your cart? Did you lift it?

+100

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who thinks him ignoring her at the store adds to how creepy he is? I don't read this as politely backing off at all. I read it as taking the rejection out on her.

But then I've also had a stalker. If OP is creeped out, she absolutely needs to trust her gut and go to a different store.

I totally disagree with you and I’m wondering what you think appropriate behavior would be? Maybe he was backing off because she blew him off outside of work (he didn’t approach her at his job despite having plenty of opportunity) perhaps he was respecting her boundary by waiting to see if she asked for help (which she didn’t). Even if he was interested in her he did everything correctly 1) approached her outside of the work environment and 2) picked up on her rejection and allowed her to set the boundaries (not asking him for help) other than simply not existing in her presence what exactly is this man supposed to do? And FYI OP most definitely had a friendly relationship with this employee at some point, even if it was just casual hello/how are you at the store she has clearly spoken with him in the past.

He was supposed to help her with the water as per his job description and the fact she's not supposed to put it on the scanner. If everything was a totally innocent misunderstanding, he should do his job despite awkwardness or at least go get someone else to help her. Ignoring her is emotionally immature.

How do you know his job discription is and what he was supposed to do or not do. You are equally as crazy as OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who thinks him ignoring her at the store adds to how creepy he is? I don't read this as politely backing off at all. I read it as taking the rejection out on her.

But then I've also had a stalker. If OP is creeped out, she absolutely needs to trust her gut and go to a different store.

I totally disagree with you and I’m wondering what you think appropriate behavior would be? Maybe he was backing off because she blew him off outside of work (he didn’t approach her at his job despite having plenty of opportunity) perhaps he was respecting her boundary by waiting to see if she asked for help (which she didn’t). Even if he was interested in her he did everything correctly 1) approached her outside of the work environment and 2) picked up on her rejection and allowed her to set the boundaries (not asking him for help) other than simply not existing in her presence what exactly is this man supposed to do? And FYI OP most definitely had a friendly relationship with this employee at some point, even if it was just casual hello/how are you at the store she has clearly spoken with him in the past.

DP For me his mistake was saying "I think about you all the time." And to someone you barely know! That's so creepy and weird. I'm actually trying to figure out as a woman what would the appropriate response to that, even I DID like the guy and was interested in going out with him. He would have done better to just say "oh, it's funny seeing you here, how have you been, etc." Is the OP supposed to respond that she thinks about him too? Or say she's flattered? Like I don't even know what kind of opening that is.

So yeah, it's nominally better that he did that outside of work rather than at work, it's good that he backed off, and it's understandable that he now feels too awkward to help her, but if it were me I'd probably not even want to go to that store anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Light this beta on fire please

Which one? Both?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Over the previous few months I’ve needed to go to a large club warehouse weekly sometimes 2-3x a week to buy things for a charitable organization. This meant I saw many of the employees over and over again and would say hi, ask how they were etc. About a week before Christmas I was leaving wegmans and ran into one of the warehouse employees who recognized me and approached me saying it was funny to see me there as I’m always at the other store. He then confided in me he thinks about me a lot. This was awkward and I basically said okay and left as fast as I could. I’ve had to go to that store much less post holiday. Today I needed to go in and I had heavy items at self checkout where he happened to be working. I was offered no help with scanning the items and they’ve removed the hand scanners so I was forced to lift heavy cases of water. He did see me and gave me an uncomfortable look. I’m wondering if I should say something or not as everyone else was offered help.

Say what? It sounds like he was kind to you and you responded with rudeness.

Are you so helpless that you can’t lift water? You chose the self checkout!

Are you a man?

Any woman would be creeped out if she encountered a store employee out and about , who said he thinks about her all the time.

We are taught to give such men the cold shoulder, as a safe way to rebuff their unwanted attention.

This poster has done NOTHING wrong!