Say something to store manager or just keep quiet?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am very surprised by this thread, you act as if what he said was not creepy. She has maybe had a few conversations with him maybe about the shopping or whatever. He ran into each other ass out of the store, so then you say, are you hungry? Do you wanna grab some coffee or something?

You don’t say: I’ve been thinking about you a lot. Maybe you say I was just thinking about you but even then they don’t have a friendship so that’s kind of weird.

That implies obsession, maybe even imagining inappropriate thoughts. I can imagine that OP was very flustered by his admonition and approach.

And now he’s staring at her? The appropriate thing would be to just pretend she’s not there like any other customer

Do not report him, do not engage, do not escalate you need to find a new fing store.

This x1000

It seems like everyone claiming this isn't creepy AF is some jarring combination of being folksy and performatively woke.

"Thinking about you a lot" is a disconcerting thing to say to someone in the context OP describes. If he was interested romantically, he could just strike up a conversation. If he was just being friendly, again, a conversation "Hi, haven't seen you in a while..."

I wouldn't report, just avoid.

I think you’re kind of missing the point. People are say in ng that what he said isn’t enough to ride to the level to complain about it, which is exactly what you said.

[Anonymous]

Op again. The complaint would be I’m not being helped or need to seek out help when the employees are supposed to automatically scan the heavy items they don’t want on their machines and they’ve removed the option for you to use the hand scanner yourself. I use self checkout when I have a small amount of items because the standard checkout line is usually huge. I’m being ignored presumable because I didn’t accept an advance. Again had he just asked me out and I said no it should have been way less strange. To tell someone you barely know you think about them a lot is odd especially considering this man is in his 50s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op again. The complaint would be I’m not being helped or need to seek out help when the employees are supposed to automatically scan the heavy items they don’t want on their machines and they’ve removed the option for you to use the hand scanner yourself. I use self checkout when I have a small amount of items because the standard checkout line is usually huge. I’m being ignored presumable because I didn’t accept an advance. Again had he just asked me out and I said no it should have been way less strange. To tell someone you barely know you think about them a lot is odd especially considering this man is in his 50s.

How old are you? That is creepy and obnoxious.

[Anonymous]

I do think the parking lot encounter a little creepy. Awkward at a minimum. Depends on the overall vibe. If OP has been stalked I can imagine it would really freak her out.

But, it sounds like he understood that he creeped you out and he is now giving you space. That shows a lot better judgment than if he were to come up to you, to be honest. I am surprised you wanted him to assist you.

[Anonymous]

I thought you were coming to complain that he did it again. You should be glad he backed off completely.
Complaining about him is way worse than what he said. I'm sure there are ways to avoid his check out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op again. The complaint would be I’m not being helped or need to seek out help when the employees are supposed to automatically scan the heavy items they don’t want on their machines and they’ve removed the option for you to use the hand scanner yourself. I use self checkout when I have a small amount of items because the standard checkout line is usually huge. I’m being ignored presumable because I didn’t accept an advance. Again had he just asked me out and I said no it should have been way less strange. To tell someone you barely know you think about them a lot is odd especially considering this man is in his 50s.

Here’s the problem OP, if you need help GO ASK for it. It is not this employees obligation to read your mind. You were uncomfortable when he spoke to you out in public and abruptly walked away, fine your prerogative, but now you expect him to act in a manner that suits your. Perhaps he picked up on your uncomfortable behavior from before and thought you didn’t need help (you chose self check out) and didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable again so was waiting for you to indicate you needed help. You seem to be suffering from main character syndrome.

[Anonymous]

Does anyone else find the OP's behavior strange or is it just me?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Over the previous few months I’ve needed to go to a large club warehouse weekly sometimes 2-3x a week to buy things for a charitable organization. This meant I saw many of the employees over and over again and would say hi, ask how they were etc. About a week before Christmas I was leaving wegmans and ran into one of the warehouse employees who recognized me and approached me saying it was funny to see me there as I’m always at the other store. He then confided in me he thinks about me a lot. This was awkward and I basically said okay and left as fast as I could. I’ve had to go to that store much less post holiday. Today I needed to go in and I had heavy items at self checkout where he happened to be working. I was offered no help with scanning the items and they’ve removed the hand scanners so I was forced to lift heavy cases of water. He did see me and gave me an uncomfortable look. I’m wondering if I should say something or not as everyone else was offered help.

Everyone else was offered help by this one guy? He single-handedly assisted every other shopped except you? Or were there other employees around? If so, why didn’t they help you? Or better yet, why didn’t you ask for help?

Seriously, explain to me what you would actually say to the manager. Let’s workshop this for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Next time you should say “hi, could I please get help with my water”

This! He obviously realized what he said made you feel awkward. In trying not to let that affect his job, he stayed back. If he didn't realize he was making you feel awkward, I would say something. He doesn't know how to fix it. So, give him the benefit of the doubt and pretend like nothing happened.

If he keeps making you feel uncomfortable, reasses the situation.

[Anonymous]

OP you sound like you have zero social skills.

How mundane, uninteresting, and empty is your life that you'd like to talk to a store manager about an employee who at best was being friendly and at worst tried to shoot his shot OFF THE CLOCK. Do you work? Do you go to church? Have friends or kids? Grow up and shift your energy elsewhere!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does anyone else find the OP's behavior strange or is it just me?

X1000000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you sound like you have zero social skills.

How mundane, uninteresting, and empty is your life that you'd like to talk to a store manager about an employee who at best was being friendly and at worst tried to shoot his shot OFF THE CLOCK. Do you work? Do you go to church? Have friends or kids? Grow up and shift your energy elsewhere!

Not only off the clock but completely off the premises at a different store. How did you get the water in your cart in the first place? That's right, you lifted it yourself. Don't be a helpless maiden.

[Anonymous]

Keep quiet.

[Anonymous]

Just a thought, because our local store employs people with special needs. Perhaps you also had an encounter with a special needs employee and should respond with grace by not reporting him? I've had SN checkers and baggers make comments about my groceries, call me mom, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Over the previous few months I’ve needed to go to a large club warehouse weekly sometimes 2-3x a week to buy things for a charitable organization. This meant I saw many of the employees over and over again and would say hi, ask how they were etc. About a week before Christmas I was leaving wegmans and ran into one of the warehouse employees who recognized me and approached me saying it was funny to see me there as I’m always at the other store. He then confided in me he thinks about me a lot. This was awkward and I basically said okay and left as fast as I could. I’ve had to go to that store much less post holiday. Today I needed to go in and I had heavy items at self checkout where he happened to be working. I was offered no help with scanning the items and they’ve removed the hand scanners so I was forced to lift heavy cases of water. He did see me and gave me an uncomfortable look. I’m wondering if I should say something or not as everyone else was offered help.

Just sounds like he was embarrassed and wanted to avoid you, although I've never had anyone ask if I needed help with heavy items at these kinds of places. All you had to do was ask for assistance.