Teenagers buying each other pricey gifts bothers me

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dad can't tell him this but you can.

Tell him that if he's not getting sex he's wasting his money.

Shut your mouth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

[Anonymous]

Im the PP with the nephew apparently the gf's father expects my nephew to be doing all this.

[Anonymous]

So many still conservative / traditional gender roles. Why are all these teenage girls being taught still that a man is the plan and that a man is the wallet and he will financially prove and take care of you. Pretty sad statement.

Same as if the teen boys were being taught that a woman’s place is in the kitchen and taking care of the home and she better keep herself looking pretty for you.

Who are the parents still teaching their teens these traditional gender roles?

Teen boys expecting their girlfriends to cook and clean and teen girls expecting their boyfriends to pay for everything and be responsible for them both are sad in my view. I would be horrified if my kids thought that way.

[Anonymous]

Are you married PP? Would you be able to pay all of the bills by yourself if you got divorced? I doubt it. So you also have a man who is your plan.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you married PP? Would you be able to pay all of the bills by yourself if you got divorced? I doubt it. So you also have a man who is your plan.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

I did.

It just depends on who you are -- some of us can expect things that others can't.

[Anonymous]

DS buys his GF expensive gifts. His GF also buys expensive gifts for him. It doesn’t bother me even though I’m the one mostly footing the bill for DS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

I did.

It just depends on who you are -- some of us can expect things that others can't.

Zing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sigh.

This isn't about teenagers spending too much on gifts for each other.

This is about OP either disliking her DS's girlfriend, or feel jealous of her. Or both. I bet OP is one of the people on here complaining that her DH got her nothing.

Whoa. Way to project. I’m op. Gf is ok, I don’t know her well tbh but my son likes her so it’s all good. But they both seem unnecessarily materialistic and that bothers me.

Do you have a successful marriage OP? Does your husband take you on dates, open the door for you, is he chivalrous, etc? Could you be a little jealous that this girl has self esteem? There is nothing wrong with occasionally going dutch on a date. I can remember when i was in high school dating in the early 2000s my dad explaining that boys should treat me a certain way and I should not expect less. A boy who wants to be with me will always rise to that. A guy with bad intentions won't. Nothing you describe seems overly materialistic. I'd also be happy that my son treats his girlfriend well.

If he were acting like a chump I would have his dad talk to him but this sounds like the social contract that has existed between men and women since the beginning of time. One party has something the other party wants from that party in particular and the other party sets the price in expectations.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

I did.

It just depends on who you are -- some of us can expect things that others can't.

This doesn’t mean you’re better, it just means mommy and daddy had money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you married PP? Would you be able to pay all of the bills by yourself if you got divorced? I doubt it. So you also have a man who is your plan.

I absolutely would. I am employed. My husband doesn’t pay for everything and I don’t do all the domestic work. We aren’t in a traditional gender role marriage. Neither is us are dependent on the other for our basic needs.

My husband would be able to cook and clean if we divorced and I would be able to pay my own bills. The fact you think that him being able to cook or clean or me being able to pay my bills would be an impossible thing as he is a man so he shouldn’t be doing women’s work and I am a woman so I shouldnt be doing man’s work is the opposite of our views.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

I did.

It just depends on who you are -- some of us can expect things that others can't.

This doesn’t mean you’re better, it just means mommy and daddy had money.

Not necessarily.

Gonna be honest. I know you’re trying to make a point but this sort of materialism in a teen is a bit basic B. Really. Not necessarily indicative of money and obviously not class.

My other teens girlfriend came from a very well educated family with money and she did not expect all this tacky crap. They went to events together and they had one or two nice dinners. But their presents to each other were creative and sweet.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

I did.

It just depends on who you are -- some of us can expect things that others can't.

Sure Muffy,

But we are taking about an average middle class high school experience. I don't think going to fancy restaurants every date falls into that category

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just reading the post from the mom complaining about the water bottle (assuming this was one of the new trendy ones that are $50+). Why do kids need to buy gifts at all for SO?

My dc is 17 and spending a lot on his gf. Dinners, gifts, sent her home in Ubers a few times. She seems to expect it. He doesn’t have a job right now so he’s using saved money. I find this materialism really unappealing in teens. Am I naive?

Older ds had a girlfriend in high school but they had cheap, free dates. Cooked at home, made each other sweet creative gifts. I wish my other dc was like this.

Yes, what is this?! My teenage nephew wanted gift cards to restaurants to take his girlfriend out on dates with. He's also responsible for driving her home. Like she can't possibly take her own Uber home or ask her parents to pick up. This is ridiculous. I don't remember ever expecting to go out to fancy restaurant in highschool on a date.

I did.

It just depends on who you are -- some of us can expect things that others can't.

I posted above. I find it low class and basic for a teen to want to go on pricey dates on mom and dad’s dime. It’s cringey. The point of being a teen is to be creative.