80% of women swipe on just 20% of men on dating apps

[Anonymous]

If men didn’t swipe on every single person, the system would work better. Men have ruined the system. I read a comparison by the speech prof and have posted about it before, it goes something like:

Imagine you are job hunting. You apply for every single job you see - doctor, mail man, plumber, tax accountant, home inspector. You find a job you love, one that you really want, but You don’t hear anything back, because other people have also flooded the hiring team with their resumes that aren’t qualified and don’t match. the hiring teams have 10,000 resumes to review, most of which aren’t even interested in the job.

This is what men have done to dating apps. Instead of only swiping on people you’re actually interested in, you swipe on everyone and flood the inbox, mostly of women you aren’t even interested in.

[Anonymous]

This 80/20 thing has been disproven. Just more red pill bullshit.

https://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/relationships/a64339071/80-and-20-rule/

https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/can-we-stop-with-the-80-women-picking-20-men-dating-myth/

Why do lefty men never complain about this stuff? Isn’t it odd that you only hear it from magat manosphere right wing nut jobs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think you should instead ask yourself why men consistently swipe right on a much higher percentage of women. Are they honestly interested in relationships with all of those women?

No.

And that's the difference. Women are choosy because they are trying to select for a life partner. Men are not choosy because hey, if they meet a life partner cool, but in the meantime, they are just looking for a warm bed. And unlike women, men don't have as tight of a timeline so they can play this game.

And if you are a man who is interested in a life partner, you need to better understand what makes you a good partner and highlight that. Women learn to do this from a young age out of necessity. Men can learn it too. Women want men who have their $hit together.If you are struggling on the dating market, start there.

Women want men who are tall, even if their faces are average. No different than men who want thin women, even if their faces are average.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If men didn’t swipe on every single person, the system would work better. Men have ruined the system. I read a comparison by the speech prof and have posted about it before, it goes something like:

Imagine you are job hunting. You apply for every single job you see - doctor, mail man, plumber, tax accountant, home inspector. You find a job you love, one that you really want, but You don’t hear anything back, because other people have also flooded the hiring team with their resumes that aren’t qualified and don’t match. the hiring teams have 10,000 resumes to review, most of which aren’t even interested in the job.

This is what men have done to dating apps. Instead of only swiping on people you’re actually interested in, you swipe on everyone and flood the inbox, mostly of women you aren’t even interested in.

Yeah, this makes no sense.

[Anonymous]

If you have facial hair guys, groom it. Take some time with your wardrobe so you look good. Learn how to talk about a variety of subjects and be positive. Do you have friends? That's a red flag if you don't socialize with other people regularly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If men didn’t swipe on every single person, the system would work better. Men have ruined the system. I read a comparison by the speech prof and have posted about it before, it goes something like:

Imagine you are job hunting. You apply for every single job you see - doctor, mail man, plumber, tax accountant, home inspector. You find a job you love, one that you really want, but You don’t hear anything back, because other people have also flooded the hiring team with their resumes that aren’t qualified and don’t match. the hiring teams have 10,000 resumes to review, most of which aren’t even interested in the job.

This is what men have done to dating apps. Instead of only swiping on people you’re actually interested in, you swipe on everyone and flood the inbox, mostly of women you aren’t even interested in.

I’m convinced half the men don’t even read the profiles. Even for the most attractive men, I read the entire profile, every time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Remember the story about "West Elm Caleb"?
Tall, handsome, straight furniture designer who was "dating" every young woman in NYC and they were all crying about him on social media because they all thought they were his one true love.
Men will do whatever they can get away with. It's because we carry the babies that we need to be picky. Part of that means not sleeping with a guy the day you meet him and figuring out that, oh, this guy will never commit and isn't worth my time.

As West End Caleb showed, women don't want to make that choice. Instead, they get mad and blame Caleb for their choices.

Young women, just emerged from their parents' loving home, think that they are so special that the handsome prince will surely fall in love with them. I wish my mother would have given it to me straight about what dogs men can be, and what to actually look for in a man. I was too idealistic.

Huh. I did not come from a loving home and actually had extremely low self esteem when I entered the dating market because I had never been treated particularly well by anyone in my life.

This did not help me better identify "what dogs men can be." It just made me highly suspicious of anyone who was really nice to me or seemed very interested in me because I assumed they had ulterior motives (since obviously I was not worthy of that kind of affection). This led me to date a lot of men who withheld affection or put me down, not because I like "bad boys" (most of these men were good on paper in a respectable way, not like criminals or rock starts, but like lawyers and accountants who also were not very nice to me).

In raising my own daughter, I have emphasized providing her with a loving home and demonstrating a mutually respectful and kind relationship with her dad so that she knows to look for that as an adult. Sure, maybe I need to let her know that there are men who will say anything to get into your pants. But I think it's more important to model loving, respectful relationships so that when she meets men who have no interest in that, she will recognize it and think "this is not it."

Love this! You sound like a great mom.

I think this is so so important for young women these days. Leaving at the first red flags, not tolerating men who can’t respect you and your boundaries, and knowing what GOOD feels like will go a long way. Too many women put up with subpar men and deserve better!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can't stop it. Women evolved to maximize their reproductive opportunities because they spend 9 months carrying the child and then a period breastfeeding.

Surviving societies "solved" this problem by taking rights away from women and making them dependent on men. Couple economic empowerment with modern birth control, and you get the status quo.

This doesn't get fixed until an old school solution is imposed on women, and that's not happening anytime soon. Women understandably love the status quo. Look how many here prefer being alone to being stuck with a manchild. But make no mistake, as we are seeing in places ranging from Italy to Korea, this status quo won't last because it doesn't replace itself.

The future belongs to whoever forces women to have babies. Right now, that's not the West or East.

Exactly. People are trying to find a way to solve it, and it can only be done by social change or legally rolling back rights. Nothing is going to happen to you if you don’t get married or have kids, no social blowback or consequences means that there isn’t any pressure to pick. There isn’t a culture of arranged marriages or waiting for sex until marriage that forces relationships. It used to be a major shame on your family if you got pregnant out of wedlock and you had to marry the guy. That doesn’t happen now because people don’t get accidentally knocked up like that as much anymore

+ you need social shame to drive people into marriage. American culture is too big on “you do you” and that anything anyone else does in your circle of family and friends is none of your business. That’s a good thing on some level, but when it gets to the point where getting IVF on your own or staying single is completely normalized, it will have a long term effect on fertility rates.

[Anonymous]

Most of the men and women I know who are on them view them as hook-up apps and treat them accordingly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should instead ask yourself why men consistently swipe right on a much higher percentage of women. Are they honestly interested in relationships with all of those women?

No.

And that's the difference. Women are choosy because they are trying to select for a life partner. Men are not choosy because hey, if they meet a life partner cool, but in the meantime, they are just looking for a warm bed. And unlike women, men don't have as tight of a timeline so they can play this game.

And if you are a man who is interested in a life partner, you need to better understand what makes you a good partner and highlight that. Women learn to do this from a young age out of necessity. Men can learn it too. Women want men who have their $hit together.If you are struggling on the dating market, start there.

Women want men who are tall, even if their faces are average. No different than men who want thin women, even if their faces are average.

Not all women. My DH is 5'7" and I'm 5'4". It was more important to me that he was totally into me, had a cute face (subjective), intelligent and some ambition. We were equally broke college students with middle class parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If men didn’t swipe on every single person, the system would work better. Men have ruined the system. I read a comparison by the speech prof and have posted about it before, it goes something like:

Imagine you are job hunting. You apply for every single job you see - doctor, mail man, plumber, tax accountant, home inspector. You find a job you love, one that you really want, but You don’t hear anything back, because other people have also flooded the hiring team with their resumes that aren’t qualified and don’t match. the hiring teams have 10,000 resumes to review, most of which aren’t even interested in the job.

This is what men have done to dating apps. Instead of only swiping on people you’re actually interested in, you swipe on everyone and flood the inbox, mostly of women you aren’t even interested in.

I’m convinced half the men don’t even read the profiles. Even for the most attractive men, I read the entire profile, every time.

I don’t think they do either. On a diff post on here about OLD one man admitted he didn’t bother, and would only scan the profile if they ended up matching. Like what a waste of everyone’s time!

They also continually degrade the women they match with “only getting 2s and 3s” etc kind of language. It’s so gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Most of the men and women I know who are on them view them as hook-up apps and treat them accordingly.

That's your circle. Most of the people I know are looking for a partner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think you should instead ask yourself why men consistently swipe right on a much higher percentage of women. Are they honestly interested in relationships with all of those women?

No.

And that's the difference. Women are choosy because they are trying to select for a life partner. Men are not choosy because hey, if they meet a life partner cool, but in the meantime, they are just looking for a warm bed. And unlike women, men don't have as tight of a timeline so they can play this game.

And if you are a man who is interested in a life partner, you need to better understand what makes you a good partner and highlight that. Women learn to do this from a young age out of necessity. Men can learn it too. Women want men who have their $hit together.If you are struggling on the dating market, start there.

Women want men who are tall, even if their faces are average. No different than men who want thin women, even if their faces are average.

Not really. Do you know any married men? Are they all over 6’? Because in my circle I think there’s 2 guys over 6’ and everyone else coupled up is shorter.

Stop buying red pill garbage and get out in the real world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If men didn’t swipe on every single person, the system would work better. Men have ruined the system. I read a comparison by the speech prof and have posted about it before, it goes something like:

Imagine you are job hunting. You apply for every single job you see - doctor, mail man, plumber, tax accountant, home inspector. You find a job you love, one that you really want, but You don’t hear anything back, because other people have also flooded the hiring team with their resumes that aren’t qualified and don’t match. the hiring teams have 10,000 resumes to review, most of which aren’t even interested in the job.

This is what men have done to dating apps. Instead of only swiping on people you’re actually interested in, you swipe on everyone and flood the inbox, mostly of women you aren’t even interested in.

Yeah, this makes no sense.

My post makes no sense, or men swiping on every single profile makes no sense?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You can't stop it. Women evolved to maximize their reproductive opportunities because they spend 9 months carrying the child and then a period breastfeeding.

Surviving societies "solved" this problem by taking rights away from women and making them dependent on men. Couple economic empowerment with modern birth control, and you get the status quo.

This doesn't get fixed until an old school solution is imposed on women, and that's not happening anytime soon. Women understandably love the status quo. Look how many here prefer being alone to being stuck with a manchild. But make no mistake, as we are seeing in places ranging from Italy to Korea, this status quo won't last because it doesn't replace itself.

The future belongs to whoever forces women to have babies. Right now, that's not the West or East.

Exactly. People are trying to find a way to solve it, and it can only be done by social change or legally rolling back rights. Nothing is going to happen to you if you don’t get married or have kids, no social blowback or consequences means that there isn’t any pressure to pick. There isn’t a culture of arranged marriages or waiting for sex until marriage that forces relationships. It used to be a major shame on your family if you got pregnant out of wedlock and you had to marry the guy. That doesn’t happen now because people don’t get accidentally knocked up like that as much anymore

+ you need social shame to drive people into marriage. American culture is too big on “you do you” and that anything anyone else does in your circle of family and friends is none of your business. That’s a good thing on some level, but when it gets to the point where getting IVF on your own or staying single is completely normalized, it will have a long term effect on fertility rates.

There’s 8 billion people in the world. We’ll be fine with a few less kids.