80% of women swipe on just 20% of men on dating apps

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]DW here. I haven't online dated in 15 years but when I did, I ALWAYS paid for half the expenses, maybe didn't split every bill, but if he got dinner one night, I'd get it (or movie tickets and popcorn/drinks) the next time, etc.

I don't need or want anyone to pay for me, and I also don't have sex with anyone until I get to know them and there's a bond beyond just hormones.

[/quote]

That was 15 years ago. Now it’s different - almost nobody is exclusive when they start sleeping and men sleep around a lot. You would feel a total fool splitting and then he says “sorry I’ll go with my other option”. I’m not paying for men sampling me. [/quote]

If you’re a woman over 40 with a kid, you’re not exactly prime dating material, and please spare me the line about execs and generous gentlemen (what an instant yuck).

You’re still being sampled, that’s the nature of dating. You’re only begging for free food and entertainment, which is a turn off for many, and likely only keeps the desperate ones in your already shallow dating pool.

It’s fine to not have sex if you don’t feel like it, but have the dignity to pay for your food and activities once in a while or at least offer. Sounds like you’ve been pumped and dumped before and are extra cautious, but you’re only making it worse for yourself. Basically you’re an overweight middle aged woman looking for a sugar daddy. So cringe.

[Anonymous]

[quote]

If you’re a woman over 40 with a kid, you’re not exactly prime dating material, and please spare me the line about execs and generous gentlemen (what an instant yuck).

You’re still being sampled, that’s the nature of dating. You’re only begging for free food and entertainment, which is a turn off for many, and likely only keeps the desperate ones in your already shallow dating pool.

It’s fine to not have sex if you don’t feel like it, but have the dignity to pay for your food and activities once in a while or at least offer. Sounds like you’ve been pumped and dumped before and are extra cautious, but you’re only making it worse for yourself. Basically you’re an overweight middle aged woman looking for a sugar daddy. So cringe.

[/quote]

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP.

Are people going to 5 consecutive dinner dates with the same person?

There are so many interesting things to do on dates besides dinner. The first date is usually a coffee date. The next might be dinner. The next three might be a walk by a lake, visiting a museum, the zoo, a movie, hiking etc. Some of these other dates might include eating ice cream or yogurt, popcorn at the movies, eating a sandwich or a salad, etc.

I don’t know any woman who pays for dates. But I also don't know any women who are interested in dinner dates five times in a row.

And kisses and making out usually happen even when sex is not yet on the table, so one can still feel interest and excitement without sex.

Is this how pre menopausal women imagine dating? Museum, zoo, ice cream, popcorn and movies? What, are you going to bring your kid along for the date too?

Worrying so much about the cost of a date gives off poverty vibes. This is such a cringe choosy beggar. Fellas, the dating scene is pretty rough out there. Dating as a single mom with a teen is not going to be easy, maybe lower the standards a bit.

This is why I never date women over 30 or single moms. Nothing wrong with using them for booty calls but they are completely delusional and detached from reality.

You are making these women a huge favor by not dating them. Would love to see your own stats but of course you would lie.
If there is anyone delusional here it’s you. I never went on a single date where a man wouldn’t be at the same level of attractiveness and as well-off as myself at least. Women don’t date down. In my state women hold statistical advantage on dating market.

Attractive after 40 is an oxymoron, but it’s ok, people look for other things at that age. If you were that well off you wouldn’t be begging for free stuff from your dates. What does it mean women hold the statistical advantage on dating market?

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote]

If you’re a woman over 40 with a kid, you’re not exactly prime dating material, and please spare me the line about execs and generous gentlemen (what an instant yuck).

You’re still being sampled, that’s the nature of dating. You’re only begging for free food and entertainment, which is a turn off for many, and likely only keeps the desperate ones in your already shallow dating pool.

It’s fine to not have sex if you don’t feel like it, but have the dignity to pay for your food and activities once in a while or at least offer. Sounds like you’ve been pumped and dumped before and are extra cautious, but you’re only making it worse for yourself. Basically you’re an overweight middle aged woman looking for a sugar daddy. So cringe.

[/quote]

This.[/quote]

As I said before women take care of looks and spend more on that because that’s what men look at first . Men should cover the dates before they offer exclusivity. This is totally equitable and prevents apps abuse in my experience weeding out those who only look for quick hookups. If some man doesn’t consider my looks appealing enough to date me, he doesn’t have to. Period.

I’m 20 BMI with great a..s and big boobs, several million NW. And I have no issues entering relationships, while of course I’ve met many players. I always contributed in my long term exclusive relationships towards joint expenses.

You must be really poor or only date unattractive women, who decline sex with you, if you care so much for women going Dutch on their $18 appetizer and Green Olive is your favorite.

To give you a sample of men I dated (went on more than 5 dates over a few years): owner of a network of fertility clinics, managing partners in law and finance, a well known journalist, a university professor in physics with own page in Wikipedia for proving a theorem, high level government official/distinguished general, etc.

I never had ONSs. I have a BF now - a partner in a consulting firm, only 4 years older than myself. Each of us has one child. He’s 5’10 I’m 5’8.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP.

Are people going to 5 consecutive dinner dates with the same person?

There are so many interesting things to do on dates besides dinner. The first date is usually a coffee date. The next might be dinner. The next three might be a walk by a lake, visiting a museum, the zoo, a movie, hiking etc. Some of these other dates might include eating ice cream or yogurt, popcorn at the movies, eating a sandwich or a salad, etc.

I don’t know any woman who pays for dates. But I also don't know any women who are interested in dinner dates five times in a row.

And kisses and making out usually happen even when sex is not yet on the table, so one can still feel interest and excitement without sex.

Is this how pre menopausal women imagine dating? Museum, zoo, ice cream, popcorn and movies? What, are you going to bring your kid along for the date too?

Worrying so much about the cost of a date gives off poverty vibes. This is such a cringe choosy beggar. Fellas, the dating scene is pretty rough out there. Dating as a single mom with a teen is not going to be easy, maybe lower the standards a bit.

This is why I never date women over 30 or single moms. Nothing wrong with using them for booty calls but they are completely delusional and detached from reality.

You are making these women a huge favor by not dating them. Would love to see your own stats but of course you would lie.
If there is anyone delusional here it’s you. I never went on a single date where a man wouldn’t be at the same level of attractiveness and as well-off as myself at least. Women don’t date down. In my state women hold statistical advantage on dating market.

Attractive after 40 is an oxymoron, but it’s ok, people look for other things at that age. If you were that well off you wouldn’t be begging for free stuff from your dates. What does it mean women hold the statistical advantage on dating market?

Again, why do you use “begging”? I don’t insist on anyone dating me. Men would ask me out- it’s simple. Everyone declines when I offer to split. And some men are offended. It means “friend zone” to them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP.

Are people going to 5 consecutive dinner dates with the same person?

There are so many interesting things to do on dates besides dinner. The first date is usually a coffee date. The next might be dinner. The next three might be a walk by a lake, visiting a museum, the zoo, a movie, hiking etc. Some of these other dates might include eating ice cream or yogurt, popcorn at the movies, eating a sandwich or a salad, etc.

I don’t know any woman who pays for dates. But I also don't know any women who are interested in dinner dates five times in a row.

And kisses and making out usually happen even when sex is not yet on the table, so one can still feel interest and excitement without sex.

Is this how pre menopausal women imagine dating? Museum, zoo, ice cream, popcorn and movies? What, are you going to bring your kid along for the date too?

Worrying so much about the cost of a date gives off poverty vibes. This is such a cringe choosy beggar. Fellas, the dating scene is pretty rough out there. Dating as a single mom with a teen is not going to be easy, maybe lower the standards a bit.

This is why I never date women over 30 or single moms. Nothing wrong with using them for booty calls but they are completely delusional and detached from reality.

You are making these women a huge favor by not dating them. Would love to see your own stats but of course you would lie.
If there is anyone delusional here it’s you. I never went on a single date where a man wouldn’t be at the same level of attractiveness and as well-off as myself at least. Women don’t date down. In my state women hold statistical advantage on dating market.

Attractive after 40 is an oxymoron, but it’s ok, people look for other things at that age. If you were that well off you wouldn’t be begging for free stuff from your dates. What does it mean women hold the statistical advantage on dating market?

There are plenty of stunning women over 40 on the apps, what are you taking about ? Maybe you don’t fit their stats so you don’t even see the profiles. Anyway, I’m done and not here to argue with you.

My recommendation to women is never sleep too soon and sleep with only men who show a real effort

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]

As I said before women take care of looks and spend more on that because that’s what men look at first . Men should cover the dates before they offer exclusivity. This is totally equitable and prevents apps abuse in my experience weeding out those who only look for quick hookups. If some man doesn’t consider my looks appealing enough to date me, he doesn’t have to. Period.

I’m 20 BMI with great a..s and big boobs, several million NW. And I have no issues entering relationships, while of course I’ve met many players. I always contributed in my long term exclusive relationships towards joint expenses.

You must be really poor or only date unattractive women, who decline sex with you, if you care so much for women going Dutch on their $18 appetizer and Green Olive is your favorite.

To give you a sample of men I dated (went on more than 5 dates over a few years): owner of a network of fertility clinics, managing partners in law and finance, a well known journalist, a university professor in physics with own page in Wikipedia for proving a theorem, high level government official/distinguished general, etc.

I never had ONSs. I have a BF now - a partner in a consulting firm, only 4 years older than myself. Each of us has one child. He’s 5’10 I’m 5’8.


[/quote]

Wow, everyone is so accomplished on DCUM. I’m really amazed by these individuals. Great e-stats.

Still, over a “few years” (2-3?) you dated at least 8 individuals for more than five dates, and they didn’t exactly stick around. That’s in addition to “meeting many players”.

Gurl, you’ve been passed around a lot! I get the idea about making them pay to vet them out, but it’s only making things worse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP.

Are people going to 5 consecutive dinner dates with the same person?

There are so many interesting things to do on dates besides dinner. The first date is usually a coffee date. The next might be dinner. The next three might be a walk by a lake, visiting a museum, the zoo, a movie, hiking etc. Some of these other dates might include eating ice cream or yogurt, popcorn at the movies, eating a sandwich or a salad, etc.

I don’t know any woman who pays for dates. But I also don't know any women who are interested in dinner dates five times in a row.

And kisses and making out usually happen even when sex is not yet on the table, so one can still feel interest and excitement without sex.

Is this how pre menopausal women imagine dating? Museum, zoo, ice cream, popcorn and movies? What, are you going to bring your kid along for the date too?

Worrying so much about the cost of a date gives off poverty vibes. This is such a cringe choosy beggar. Fellas, the dating scene is pretty rough out there. Dating as a single mom with a teen is not going to be easy, maybe lower the standards a bit.

This is why I never date women over 30 or single moms. Nothing wrong with using them for booty calls but they are completely delusional and detached from reality.

You are making these women a huge favor by not dating them. Would love to see your own stats but of course you would lie.
If there is anyone delusional here it’s you. I never went on a single date where a man wouldn’t be at the same level of attractiveness and as well-off as myself at least. Women don’t date down. In my state women hold statistical advantage on dating market.

Attractive after 40 is an oxymoron, but it’s ok, people look for other things at that age. If you were that well off you wouldn’t be begging for free stuff from your dates. What does it mean women hold the statistical advantage on dating market?

Again, why do you use “begging”? I don’t insist on anyone dating me. Men would ask me out- it’s simple. Everyone declines when I offer to split. And some men are offended. It means “friend zone” to them.

That's right. I would offer to pay; if a man accepted, they'd be in the friends zone. I would insist on paying if I felt no connection and let him pay if I liked him. I think this is the norm, right?

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

As I said before women take care of looks and spend more on that because that’s what men look at first . Men should cover the dates before they offer exclusivity. This is totally equitable and prevents apps abuse in my experience weeding out those who only look for quick hookups. If some man doesn’t consider my looks appealing enough to date me, he doesn’t have to. Period.

I’m 20 BMI with great a..s and big boobs, several million NW. And I have no issues entering relationships, while of course I’ve met many players. I always contributed in my long term exclusive relationships towards joint expenses.

You must be really poor or only date unattractive women, who decline sex with you, if you care so much for women going Dutch on their $18 appetizer and Green Olive is your favorite.

To give you a sample of men I dated (went on more than 5 dates over a few years): owner of a network of fertility clinics, managing partners in law and finance, a well known journalist, a university professor in physics with own page in Wikipedia for proving a theorem, high level government official/distinguished general, etc.

I never had ONSs. I have a BF now - a partner in a consulting firm, only 4 years older than myself. Each of us has one child. He’s 5’10 I’m 5’8.


[/quote]

Wow, everyone is so accomplished on DCUM. I’m really amazed by these individuals. Great e-stats.

Still, over a “few years” (2-3?) you dated at least 8 individuals for more than five dates, and they didn’t exactly stick around. That’s in addition to “meeting many players”.

Gurl, you’ve been passed around a lot! I get the idea about making them pay to vet them out, but it’s only making things worse.[/quote]

You are a sick person, period. Really insecure about women sleeping with other men . Nobody is obligated to settle for the first person they meet. I enjoyed my time with all men I dated. Enjoyed meeting different men and sex with them. It didn’t make me feel used, as we were both happy. Regardless of why it didn’t work out, they were all decent, good people looking for a real connection. They were not casual encounters or anyone taking advantage of other person.
Generosity is not income related: it’s a trait. I’m generous - help family, friends, charities. I don’t sweat over splitting when I’m out with friends. If a man is tense over that is not the trait I’m looking for.
He also wont be a good equitable partner because in the end of the day, it’s way more expensive to be a woman. Men don’t spend as much on looks and make more money than women. Women paying for dates would be economically unfair.
Of course if a man wanted to split with me, I always did not I never saw them again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DP.

Are people going to 5 consecutive dinner dates with the same person?

There are so many interesting things to do on dates besides dinner. The first date is usually a coffee date. The next might be dinner. The next three might be a walk by a lake, visiting a museum, the zoo, a movie, hiking etc. Some of these other dates might include eating ice cream or yogurt, popcorn at the movies, eating a sandwich or a salad, etc.

I don’t know any woman who pays for dates. But I also don't know any women who are interested in dinner dates five times in a row.

And kisses and making out usually happen even when sex is not yet on the table, so one can still feel interest and excitement without sex.

Is this how pre menopausal women imagine dating? Museum, zoo, ice cream, popcorn and movies? What, are you going to bring your kid along for the date too?

Worrying so much about the cost of a date gives off poverty vibes. This is such a cringe choosy beggar. Fellas, the dating scene is pretty rough out there. Dating as a single mom with a teen is not going to be easy, maybe lower the standards a bit.

This is why I never date women over 30 or single moms. Nothing wrong with using them for booty calls but they are completely delusional and detached from reality.

You are making these women a huge favor by not dating them. Would love to see your own stats but of course you would lie.
If there is anyone delusional here it’s you. I never went on a single date where a man wouldn’t be at the same level of attractiveness and as well-off as myself at least. Women don’t date down. In my state women hold statistical advantage on dating market.

Attractive after 40 is an oxymoron, but it’s ok, people look for other things at that age. If you were that well off you wouldn’t be begging for free stuff from your dates. What does it mean women hold the statistical advantage on dating market?

Again, why do you use “begging”? I don’t insist on anyone dating me. Men would ask me out- it’s simple. Everyone declines when I offer to split. And some men are offended. It means “friend zone” to them.

That's right. I would offer to pay; if a man accepted, they'd be in the friends zone. I would insist on paying if I felt no connection and let him pay if I liked him. I think this is the norm, right?

Yea, most men know that if a woman insists on paying she’s not looking forward to anything romantic

[Anonymous]

Sa basically they were sampling you and you were sampling them. Nothing wrong with that, but I thought that was the opposite of what you wanted and you are a self styled expert on advising woman about how to get in long term relationships by getting men to pay for at least five dates. A few months for a relationship doesn’t seem particularly long to me, definitely in the casual category. Again nothing wrong with that, just pointing inconsistencies.

[Anonymous]

Professional men are absolutely NOT worried about being used for dinner lol. You’re delusional. Or maybe you’re just too young and poor to have met actual professional men. Many are generous and enjoy dining out with company. It does not break the bank to pay for an extra meal or two.

Many are "generous and enjoy dining out with company", huh? We can now set the baseline for a date with you, PP.

You start the week free to hunt, since your ExDH has the kids for the weekend. You fish through Tinder and land a target for Friday night. You agree to meet for dinner, and you arrive at the restaurant ready for battle, checking the lot for any sign that they may tow cars left unattended for more than 24 hours, in case he jumps the low bar set for you to "stay over".

You enter the Golden Corral, and spot him waiting by the hostess stand. During dinner, you casually slide your hand under his paper napkin and give his privates a squeeze, letting him know he will be rewarded for his generosity in springing for the Full Buffet for you both.

Next, you accept his invitation to join him in his single-wide trailer to watch WWE and "talk some more." On the drive over, you do not let him touch your skirt until he uses his Handy-Wipes (he had the fried wings, after all). You move the latest copy of Guns and Ammo so that there is space for your ever-widening bottom to fit next to him on the couch. You give the WWE five minutes while he drinks his Pabst, and you finish your White Claw knockoff. Then you pounce, using moves you read about in this week's Comso. After draining him, you demand to be returned to the Golden Corral, having become alarmed at the noise from his neighbour's domestic dispute.
and g
Once home, you stalk your EX's social media and make fun of his younger, prettier GF with your friends while guzzling the remaining half-gallon of Kirkland's finest white wine. You feel bad for your date, since if he had taken you to the Olive Garden (like you wanted), you would have given him a BJ right at the table.

You go, Girl!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sa basically they were sampling you and you were sampling them. Nothing wrong with that, but I thought that was the opposite of what you wanted and you are a self styled expert on advising woman about how to get in long term relationships by getting men to pay for at least five dates. A few months for a relationship doesn’t seem particularly long to me, definitely in the casual category. Again nothing wrong with that, just pointing inconsistencies.

The only way to find a match is sampling. As long as it’s not misleading to anyone about intentions eventually dating results in a LTR. But having random hookups on first date does not, for sure

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous]

As I said before women take care of looks and spend more on that because that’s what men look at first . Men should cover the dates before they offer exclusivity. This is totally equitable and prevents apps abuse in my experience weeding out those who only look for quick hookups. If some man doesn’t consider my looks appealing enough to date me, he doesn’t have to. Period.

I’m 20 BMI with great a..s and big boobs, several million NW. And I have no issues entering relationships, while of course I’ve met many players. I always contributed in my long term exclusive relationships towards joint expenses.

You must be really poor or only date unattractive women, who decline sex with you, if you care so much for women going Dutch on their $18 appetizer and Green Olive is your favorite.

To give you a sample of men I dated (went on more than 5 dates over a few years): owner of a network of fertility clinics, managing partners in law and finance, a well known journalist, a university professor in physics with own page in Wikipedia for proving a theorem, high level government official/distinguished general, etc.

I never had ONSs. I have a BF now - a partner in a consulting firm, only 4 years older than myself. Each of us has one child. He’s 5’10 I’m 5’8.

[/quote]

Lady - by fixating on your T&A and how much you pay to maintain yourself, and letting men do the same, you are setting yourself up to date d-bags. I (a woman) am a managing director at a big investment bank - most of those guys brag all day long about the T&A their money buys. If that’s your bag, have at it, but dont tell us that’s how to find quality men. It’s no surprise you’ve had so many of them - they dont settle down.

I’m 50, highly successful, very fit, look great for my age (but look my age - no surgery or filler), and I actually want someone to talk to. My money test is just, can they keep up - I’m happy to alternate paying but I dont want to be a sugar mama. To go back to OP, there were a lot of good answers on this thread - I look for guys who have a thoughtful profile (no bathroom or gym selfies, have pix of places you love, and say a few words about what you’re into), and who seem interested in me for more than my pictures. Those are signs they are interested in finding a person, not just a hole.

As far as sex, I’m test driving them too. I dont need their money or their genes at this point; if they’re not good in bed I dont want them either, so I dont think about it in terms of them having to buy me until they give me exclusivity - honestly, that’s absurd. It’s usually 3-4 dates - that’s enough to get a feel for whether they are actually interested in more than sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Professional men are absolutely NOT worried about being used for dinner lol. You’re delusional. Or maybe you’re just too young and poor to have met actual professional men. Many are generous and enjoy dining out with company. It does not break the bank to pay for an extra meal or two.

You sound like an incel and you’re making the pps point.

Are you a professional man? No? Then STFU. It is so irritating to have some loon (like this poster) explain how men think when she would fly off the handle if a man explained how women think.

The best part is how she knows many generous men. Generous to her is dessert at the Olive Garden right before she has sex in her date's car.

These guys should not worry about the cost of dinner if they date this poster. And they should not fear that she might not give it up. However, they should worry that she gives them something that the CDC has never encountered, and they have to wear a hazmat suit at the office after skin-to-skin contact. And for when she replies that I am an "incel", it is not all women I would avoid, since most (worthwhile) women are not looking to reward generous men. PP, how many generous men to cater to during an average month?

Gosh, you really can’t keep up huh? Someone disagrees with you so you start throwing out childish insults to make yourself feel better? It’s ok to admit you’ve never left your mommies basement. I know and work with many successful professional men, so yes, I do know how they behave. And it’s definitely not whining about women being gold diggers for wanting to get to know someone before sleeping with them. Get with the times sweet summer child.