Women in the family judging wife for being SAHM

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women belong in the home, that’s what you should tell them. While their kids are at daycare or wherever, yours are at home with their mother. This is the real feminism.

I’m so glad society is shifting and now so many more women are proud to be SAHMs (just look at the posters on this thread). I think we will soon see enrollment rates for girls drop at college because what’s the point of an education when staying at home become normalized as a career path, it’s the hardest job in the world after all.

You are a troll, but to respond to one of your trollish points, the woman in my family who stays home has a phd. Who wants their children raised by an unintelligent partner? One of the biggest factors in the success of children is their parents' education level.

You don’t need a phd to raise children. You don’t think that young girls who see women quit their jobs and who dream of having kids and having careers might think twice? The devaluing of college education will happen regardless because of AI but the current anti-working mom and pro SAHM public discourse will undoubtedly affect young women thinking about the future. Why take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you see your phd older cousin quit her job to stay home?

[Anonymous]

You don’t need a phd to raise children. You don’t think that young girls who see women quit their jobs and who dream of having kids and having careers might think twice? The devaluing of college education will happen regardless because of AI but the current anti-working mom and pro SAHM public discourse will undoubtedly affect young women thinking about the future. Why take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you see your phd older cousin quit her job to stay home?

Some of us see education as a good in itself, even if it isn't monetized. Education provides opportunities. College costs are a huge issue, but an education is never wasted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

You don’t need a phd to raise children. You don’t think that young girls who see women quit their jobs and who dream of having kids and having careers might think twice? The devaluing of college education will happen regardless because of AI but the current anti-working mom and pro SAHM public discourse will undoubtedly affect young women thinking about the future. Why take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you see your phd older cousin quit her job to stay home?

Some of us see education as a good in itself, even if it isn't monetized. Education provides opportunities. College costs are a huge issue, but an education is never wasted.

An education is never wasted even if it’s not monetized. That sound so foolish and out of touch you really aren’t worth replying to. The reason I am replying is because I think it’s interesting how people don’t realize the effects the current discourse will have on women’s college attendance and employment opportunities and am hoping someone smart will have something insightful to say.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women belong in the home, that’s what you should tell them. While their kids are at daycare or wherever, yours are at home with their mother. This is the real feminism.

I’m so glad society is shifting and now so many more women are proud to be SAHMs (just look at the posters on this thread). I think we will soon see enrollment rates for girls drop at college because what’s the point of an education when staying at home become normalized as a career path, it’s the hardest job in the world after all.

You are a troll, but to respond to one of your trollish points, the woman in my family who stays home has a phd. Who wants their children raised by an unintelligent partner? One of the biggest factors in the success of children is their parents' education level.

You don’t need a phd to raise children. You don’t think that young girls who see women quit their jobs and who dream of having kids and having careers might think twice? The devaluing of college education will happen regardless because of AI but the current anti-working mom and pro SAHM public discourse will undoubtedly affect young women thinking about the future. Why take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you see your phd older cousin quit her job to stay home?

My kids won't have to take on any debt for their education and education is what preserves and grows generational wealth. Those with less who make decisions using the framework that you've described are more likely always to have less.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The women who criticize are probably projecting some jealousy. I'm a working mom with no time for myself - it's work, kids, and running a house. I used to think less of women who stayed home when I was young and didn't have kids yet, because my parents had a super traditional marriage, and my mom had no power or access to money. I no longer think that life with kids is chaos and whatever you can do to mitigate the chaos that is good for you, your marriage, and your kids is the right choice for you. And again, anyone criticizing is probably projecting.

100%. I have always been a strong feminist. It was so important to me that I could independently finance our household if needed (and DH could as well). Worked my ass off. Two kids, busy husband, total chaos. I recently lost my job. After the initial sadness, I am surprisingly content. Our house is so much more peaceful. US society is generally not set up for two people working (not enough time) or one person working (not enough money). It’s really sad. Ignore your relatives. Do whatever works for your family.

This was my exact experience after circumstances had me SAH. Our life was SO CALM and orderly. The thing is, you have to be the right type of person who is married to the right type of husband to make this work. I think some women know their limitations, or accept their husband’s wouldn’t be supportive, but that DOES NOT give them the right to judge someone else.

Never hang with Democrats, they some judgy SOB’s.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women belong in the home, that’s what you should tell them. While their kids are at daycare or wherever, yours are at home with their mother. This is the real feminism.

I’m so glad society is shifting and now so many more women are proud to be SAHMs (just look at the posters on this thread). I think we will soon see enrollment rates for girls drop at college because what’s the point of an education when staying at home become normalized as a career path, it’s the hardest job in the world after all.

You are a troll, but to respond to one of your trollish points, the woman in my family who stays home has a phd. Who wants their children raised by an unintelligent partner? One of the biggest factors in the success of children is their parents' education level.

You don’t need a phd to raise children. You don’t think that young girls who see women quit their jobs and who dream of having kids and having careers might think twice? The devaluing of college education will happen regardless because of AI but the current anti-working mom and pro SAHM public discourse will undoubtedly affect young women thinking about the future. Why take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you see your phd older cousin quit her job to stay home?

My kids won't have to take on any debt for their education and education is what preserves and grows generational wealth. Those with less who make decisions using the framework that you've described are more likely always to have less.

Interesting. So you are saying you don’t care about young girls in low to middle income families who dream of being professionals (and would for example take out a loan to go to law school) and mothers and might be persuaded against that by discourse that trashes working women?

[Anonymous]

No one is trashing working mothers here. No one.

[Anonymous]

Feminists don't participate in the mommy wars.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No one is trashing working mothers here. No one.

Discourse that glorifies staying at home is implicitly anti working women. It influences women to question their decision to work. I know it’s not the intention of most of the tradwives online to denigrate working women, but unfortunately this issue is a binary. Saying tradwives/SAHMs work so hard and are doing what’s best for their children is leading many young women to question the value of working at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one is trashing working mothers here. No one.

Discourse that glorifies staying at home is implicitly anti working women. It influences women to question their decision to work. I know it’s not the intention of most of the tradwives online to denigrate working women, but unfortunately this issue is a binary. Saying tradwives/SAHMs work so hard and are doing what’s best for their children is leading many young women to question the value of working at all.

It’s not discourse, it’s natural, backed by science and logic. We know kids survive in daycare, but it’s denying science to claim it’s all the same.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one is trashing working mothers here. No one.

Discourse that glorifies staying at home is implicitly anti working women. It influences women to question their decision to work. I know it’s not the intention of most of the tradwives online to denigrate working women, but unfortunately this issue is a binary. Saying tradwives/SAHMs work so hard and are doing what’s best for their children is leading many young women to question the value of working at all.

It’s not discourse, it’s natural, backed by science and logic. We know kids survive in daycare, but it’s denying science to claim it’s all the same.

I don’t think you understand what discourse means or the nature of online influence. I’m replying to idiots like you in the hopes that the smart career women on this forum reply (like the nyc op from a recent thread who makes 900k!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Women belong in the home, that’s what you should tell them. While their kids are at daycare or wherever, yours are at home with their mother. This is the real feminism.

I’m so glad society is shifting and now so many more women are proud to be SAHMs (just look at the posters on this thread). I think we will soon see enrollment rates for girls drop at college because what’s the point of an education when staying at home become normalized as a career path, it’s the hardest job in the world after all.

You are a troll, but to respond to one of your trollish points, the woman in my family who stays home has a phd. Who wants their children raised by an unintelligent partner? One of the biggest factors in the success of children is their parents' education level.

You don’t need a phd to raise children. You don’t think that young girls who see women quit their jobs and who dream of having kids and having careers might think twice? The devaluing of college education will happen regardless because of AI but the current anti-working mom and pro SAHM public discourse will undoubtedly affect young women thinking about the future. Why take on hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt when you see your phd older cousin quit her job to stay home?

My kids won't have to take on any debt for their education and education is what preserves and grows generational wealth. Those with less who make decisions using the framework that you've described are more likely always to have less.

Interesting. So you are saying you don’t care about young girls in low to middle income families who dream of being professionals (and would for example take out a loan to go to law school) and mothers and might be persuaded against that by discourse that trashes working women?

No, that's not my position at all. I support educating women, whether women choose to enter the workforce or dedicate themselves to being a SAHM. I think education is intrinsically valuable. I also think education is extrinsically valuable beyond whether it leads to career advancement. It helps us understand and experience the world. It develops our ability to reason. The intellectual satisfaction of learning is self-justifying. The list can go on and on.

I equally support men and women who pursue better opportunities for themselves by taking on student loans. Why wouldn't I?

I also take issue with discourse that trashes women's choices to work or stay home, or attempts to prescribe to women what they should do with their lives. The poster who is making these claims clearly hasn't had the benefit of meaningful education.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one is trashing working mothers here. No one.

Discourse that glorifies staying at home is implicitly anti working women. It influences women to question their decision to work. I know it’s not the intention of most of the tradwives online to denigrate working women, but unfortunately this issue is a binary. Saying tradwives/SAHMs work so hard and are doing what’s best for their children is leading many young women to question the value of working at all.

It’s not discourse, it’s natural, backed by science and logic. We know kids survive in daycare, but it’s denying science to claim it’s all the same.

I don’t think you understand what discourse means or the nature of online influence. I’m replying to idiots like you in the hopes that the smart career women on this forum reply (like the nyc op from a recent thread who makes 900k!).

I understand what discourse is and you’e conflating the discussion as glorifying something that is natural and proven to be better for a child. There actually is no debate. And there is value in working, sure, but raising the children you choose to have is inherently more valuable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No one is trashing working mothers here. No one.

Discourse that glorifies staying at home is implicitly anti working women. It influences women to question their decision to work. I know it’s not the intention of most of the tradwives online to denigrate working women, but unfortunately this issue is a binary. Saying tradwives/SAHMs work so hard and are doing what’s best for their children is leading many young women to question the value of working at all.

It’s not discourse, it’s natural, backed by science and logic. We know kids survive in daycare, but it’s denying science to claim it’s all the same.

I don’t think you understand what discourse means or the nature of online influence. I’m replying to idiots like you in the hopes that the smart career women on this forum reply (like the nyc op from a recent thread who makes 900k!).

I understand what discourse is and you’e conflating the discussion as glorifying something that is natural and proven to be better for a child. There actually is no debate. And there is value in working, sure, but raising the children you choose to have is inherently more valuable.

So women shouldn’t work. That’s exactly my point, the only issue is that people like you refuse to acknowledge the natural endpoint of this kind of rhetoric and this social norm—which is young women questioning the value of college. Why not say that college is useless for girls who want to be mothers since mothers need to at home with their children?

[Anonymous]

People will always criticize a woman's choices, whatever they are. You need to have a strong sense of your identity and your wishes and ignore the nonsense. A lot of it is just talk.