If you’re a single woman having an affair with a married man

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP here. He’s married I suspect he’ll stay that way. His kids and their wellbeing are very important to him. He even has a loving realtionship with his wife which is good everywhere except for attraction and sex. She rejects him for sex constantly and he’s not sure he can get erect for her anymore anyway without help from meds. I’m just out of a long term relationship and don’t want anything serious. We both get good, really good, sex and neither of us are interested in it going any further. So, yeah, I’m hanging out with friends on the 4th but I don’t currently feel like I need more.

Some women are incredible. This piece of sh**t here knowingly f**g a married man goes as far as saying yeah he cares about his kids and wife b**ch how about you go find another man who is not taken. A woman will destroy another woman's lofe and not be bothered by it 1 second.

Hate to tell you but he wouldn’t be able to stay in a sexless marriage. The marriage lasts longer and is more functional because I’m here doing what she should be doing. If she initiated sex with him even once a month I probably wouldn’t be in the picture. If she ever starts having sex with him again I’m sure we’d stop seeing each other. But, he’s been trying for 5+ years - he’s even tried to get her to go to counseling but she has no interest.

Ew you are gross. Ask yourself what about this situation arouses you and why you cannot find an unmarried man.

Sure there are other guys out there but I’m not looking for a relationship. I just need one aspect to be happy right now and he’s in the same boat. Plus, he’s really hot, we have tons of chemistry and its not just regular ho-hum sex.

IOW part of the charge is that he is cheating and it is forbidden. ew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask why you do it? You do realize he’s married and his loyalty stays with his wife and children. Just curious what the single woman thinks the end result will be? Usually when affairs are discovered the AP is immediately dropped. You gotta be a real desperate loser to think you have a chance.

Not true. He leaves his wife for her over 75 percent of the time

With new red state laws this will change. Women on the side will never be the wife

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You post this every quarter, OP.

1. Get therapy.

2. The blame lies with the married affair partner, not the unmarried one. The single person doesn't betray anyone. It's the married person who betrays their spouse.

- married person

Agree 100 %

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP here. He’s married I suspect he’ll stay that way. His kids and their wellbeing are very important to him. He even has a loving realtionship with his wife which is good everywhere except for attraction and sex. She rejects him for sex constantly and he’s not sure he can get erect for her anymore anyway without help from meds. I’m just out of a long term relationship and don’t want anything serious. We both get good, really good, sex and neither of us are interested in it going any further. So, yeah, I’m hanging out with friends on the 4th but I don’t currently feel like I need more.

Some women are incredible. This piece of sh**t here knowingly f**g a married man goes as far as saying yeah he cares about his kids and wife b**ch how about you go find another man who is not taken. A woman will destroy another woman's lofe and not be bothered by it 1 second.

No the AP is not married stop blaming them

The person who is married is the trash

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask why you do it? You do realize he’s married and his loyalty stays with his wife and children. Just curious what the single woman thinks the end result will be? Usually when affairs are discovered the AP is immediately dropped. You gotta be a real desperate loser to think you have a chance.

Not true. He leaves his wife for her over 75 percent of the time

With new red state laws this will change. Women on the side will never be the wife

No it's like 10% of the time. And if those relationships turn into marriage (which is rare), they have a 75% divorce rate.

Now we're talking about a lot of people so there are always exceptions to the rules. But just based on how many divorces are initiated by the wife, not the husband, and how many men cheat, your math is impossible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not having an affair, just sex. Sending the ones who are not good in bed, back to their wives. I do feel sorry for the women who have to live with them or who are dating them.
Few are good in bed, but I wouldn't date them as they have other problems from ASD (can't get it up as brain and it don't connect easily) to childhood trauma.

There we go again. Can we have a single thread without someone saying that a man has some form of mental illness?

Are you saying men with erectile dysfunction have ASD? Incredible. Maybe your brain is the one that's f**d up

NP. That is your interpretation of PP’s statement. Try to understand why you interpreted that way and why it bothers you so much.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You post this every quarter, OP.

1. Get therapy.

2. The blame lies with the married affair partner, not the unmarried one. The single person doesn't betray anyone. It's the married person who betrays their spouse.

- married person

Agree 100 %

The question isn't about blame, it's about understanding someone's motivation.

What no one has mentioned is that as mammals we have a mate-poaching instinct. If you see someone already successfully raising his children, then survival-wise you figure he is a safe bet. Of course, in a complex society where women can take care of themselves, this instinct probably causes more problems than it solves. But it's a thing and we'd be foolish to ignore how much we do things without really understanding ourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask why you do it? You do realize he’s married and his loyalty stays with his wife and children. Just curious what the single woman thinks the end result will be? Usually when affairs are discovered the AP is immediately dropped. You gotta be a real desperate loser to think you have a chance.

Not true. He leaves his wife for her over 75 percent of the time

With new red state laws this will change. Women on the side will never be the wife

Huh? Only 2% ever marry/end up with the AP. Not great odds there

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You post this every quarter, OP.

1. Get therapy.

2. The blame lies with the married affair partner, not the unmarried one. The single person doesn't betray anyone. It's the married person who betrays their spouse.

- married person

Agree 100 %

The question isn't about blame, it's about understanding someone's motivation.

What no one has mentioned is that as mammals we have a mate-poaching instinct. If you see someone already successfully raising his children, then survival-wise you figure he is a safe bet. Of course, in a complex society where women can take care of themselves, this instinct probably causes more problems than it solves. But it's a thing and we'd be foolish to ignore how much we do things without really understanding ourselves.

I’m more evolved than an animal. I don’t go banging someone else’s spouse just because I feel a buzz in my crotch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My God, this again. Just get therapy. The Relationship Forum has way too much hand-wringing and agonizing over cheating as it is. Maybe read the millions of threads asking this very thing, over and over again!!!

This forum really seems to trigger the APs.

Really?

I think it triggers the desperate SAHM wives.

🥴

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask why you do it? You do realize he’s married and his loyalty stays with his wife and children. Just curious what the single woman thinks the end result will be? Usually when affairs are discovered the AP is immediately dropped. You gotta be a real desperate loser to think you have a chance.

My uncle left my aunt and 3 young kids to be with his much- younger side piece. She got the promotion to second wife and he walked away from his first family without a second glance and without a cent of financial support. They’re still together 25 years later.

So your uncle was the problem. Poor moral character. The woman was irrelevant. Proves some PPs points.

[Anonymous]

I think there's an inherent projection/flawed thinking. What is the statistic that few divorced/widowed women remarry because marriage isn't great for us. Why is there an assumption that these OW/AP wants to keep this man. Maybe she's just using him? Is that counter to the assumption that the wife is guarding her prize of a DH? Is it an insult that a woman may be just using YOUR DH and that's it?

Or is that narrative inconvenient?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not having an affair, just sex. Sending the ones who are not good in bed, back to their wives. I do feel sorry for the women who have to live with them or who are dating them.
Few are good in bed, but I wouldn't date them as they have other problems from ASD (can't get it up as brain and it don't connect easily) to childhood trauma.

There we go again. Can we have a single thread without someone saying that a man has some form of mental illness?

Are you saying men with erectile dysfunction have ASD? Incredible. Maybe your brain is the one that's f**d up

NP. That is your interpretation of PP’s statement. Try to understand why you interpreted that way and why it bothers you so much.

On this forum women are quick to say that men suffer from mental illness. I think most of us are not equipped with the skills/training to diagnose someone with a mental illness. People here are quick to say yeah he has ASD, autism, this, that. You can criticize men in hundreds of ways before concluding that they are mentally ill.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can I ask why you do it? You do realize he’s married and his loyalty stays with his wife and children. Just curious what the single woman thinks the end result will be? Usually when affairs are discovered the AP is immediately dropped. You gotta be a real desperate loser to think you have a chance.

Not true. He leaves his wife for her over 75 percent of the time

With new red state laws this will change. Women on the side will never be the wife

Huh? Only 2% ever marry/end up with the AP. Not great odds there

And then 60% of those get divorced

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:AP here. He’s married I suspect he’ll stay that way. His kids and their wellbeing are very important to him. He even has a loving realtionship with his wife which is good everywhere except for attraction and sex. She rejects him for sex constantly and he’s not sure he can get erect for her anymore anyway without help from meds. I’m just out of a long term relationship and don’t want anything serious. We both get good, really good, sex and neither of us are interested in it going any further. So, yeah, I’m hanging out with friends on the 4th but I don’t currently feel like I need more.

Some women are incredible. This piece of sh**t here knowingly f**g a married man goes as far as saying yeah he cares about his kids and wife b**ch how about you go find another man who is not taken. A woman will destroy another woman's lofe and not be bothered by it 1 second.

No the AP is not married stop blaming them

The person who is married is the trash

+1. Don't blame me if your husband lied to you last night to be with me. He gives me all the time and attention I need. I didn't ask him. If he stops I'll be just fine. Perhaps take better care of your husband and he won't step out.