My Son Told Us He's Proposing

[Anonymous]

Am I the only one who found it weird OP described the son's relationship as passionate?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys are nuts, it doesn’t sound like the future mil told the future ride-she probably told the girls aunts or something. Genuinely-who cares? You sound like a mother of the groom-zilla.

You think it’s fine for everyone but the bride to be to know? What if she says no? It’s also HER story to tell, not her mother’s, especially since it really isn’t a story yet.

Exactly.

That the mom thinks she any agency in this at all is completely insane.

[Anonymous]

As the guy with a similar style MIL. I decide very early on not to engage or acknowledge her BS. It's what she wants. She continuously makes her self look like fool while trying to stand on her pedestal of greatness. She will do something ridiculous aimed at me, and her siblings will come to me and say "I don't know how you deal with that" or "You are saint for having her as a MIL".

Let her do her thing, her daughter probably does but definitely will notice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are so good together. It's been 2 years. They are 25 and 26. Soft and kind and respectful and passionate. I'm biased (a bit) but I think they will have a lovely marriage.

He asked her parents first. It was more an act of respect than it was a request for permission. They very happily gave their blessing.

And then the mom started demanding to know when the proposal was coming. My son was having the ring custom made and artists are flakey so it could be a month.

His future MIL has told pretty much all the family and I'm stunned the bride to be doesnt know yet.

I am livid.

The future MIL is a huge red flag.
If you love your son, you should warn him about marrying into this family. You should even do everything in your power to stop that marriage.
You have an obligation to protect your son.

Do you all not see the irony !? LOL. Half of the responses on this thread are a so hypocritical.
Because the other MIL is so happy for her DD that she mentioned the proposal to what OP says is "pretty much all the family" (is this 3 people or 100??)
So we want OP to WARN her son about marrying into THIS family do EVERYTHING in her POWER to STOP the marriage. L the freaking O L!

Yep. These responses are basically "how can I prove that I'm the needy drama llama MIL, not the other one".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Am I the only one who found it weird OP described the son's relationship as passionate?

Mama is happy that the son is getting some.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys are nuts, it doesn’t sound like the future mil told the future ride-she probably told the girls aunts or something. Genuinely-who cares? You sound like a mother of the groom-zilla.

You think it’s fine for everyone but the bride to be to know? What if she says no? It’s also HER story to tell, not her mother’s, especially since it really isn’t a story yet.

Exactly.

That the mom thinks she any agency in this at all is completely insane.

Again, the bride can handle this. Others don't need to be outraged on the bride's behalf.

[Anonymous]

If you tell people before you propose, this is what happens. The word gets out! I am sure his soon-to-be fiancee does know it's coming because they've talked about marriage. So don't put too much weight on the blabby MIL.

And yes, you stay out of it. Don't talk trash to your son. Just let it ride. Be kind and calm and helpful asked. This is his show to deal with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:They are so good together. It's been 2 years. They are 25 and 26. Soft and kind and respectful and passionate. I'm biased (a bit) but I think they will have a lovely marriage.

He asked her parents first. It was more an act of respect than it was a request for permission. They very happily gave their blessing.

And then the mom started demanding to know when the proposal was coming. My son was having the ring custom made and artists are flakey so it could be a month.

His future MIL has told pretty much all the family and I'm stunned the bride to be doesnt know yet.

I am livid.

The future MIL is a huge red flag.
If you love your son, you should warn him about marrying into this family. You should even do everything in your power to stop that marriage.
You have an obligation to protect your son.

Yes. Introduce him to someone else in the meanwhile so the "passion" is not absent from his life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys are nuts, it doesn’t sound like the future mil told the future ride-she probably told the girls aunts or something. Genuinely-who cares? You sound like a mother of the groom-zilla.

You think it’s fine for everyone but the bride to be to know? What if she says no? It’s also HER story to tell, not her mother’s, especially since it really isn’t a story yet.

Exactly.

That the mom thinks she any agency in this at all is completely insane.

Again, the bride can handle this. Others don't need to be outraged on the bride's behalf.

Why are you commenting on this, then?

[Anonymous]

She wants to make sure nothing is wrong. She wants to make sure the proposal is still on. This is anxiety, likely, unfortunate but not evil. It's an indication she wants your son in the family! All need to chill out. You have a long road ahead of you. Do not get into the mindset of jumping to the worst conclusion about people. Or certainly do not express negativity to your son. The healthy of his marriage will depend on everyone getting along. He can vent. But you'll have to listen, only listen and not add.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You guys are nuts, it doesn’t sound like the future mil told the future ride-she probably told the girls aunts or something. Genuinely-who cares? You sound like a mother of the groom-zilla.

You think it’s fine for everyone but the bride to be to know? What if she says no? It’s also HER story to tell, not her mother’s, especially since it really isn’t a story yet.

Exactly.

That the mom thinks she any agency in this at all is completely insane.

Again, the bride can handle this. Others don't need to be outraged on the bride's behalf.

Why are you commenting on this, then?

For giggles, silly OP!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She wants to make sure nothing is wrong. She wants to make sure the proposal is still on. This is anxiety, likely, unfortunate but not evil. It's an indication she wants your son in the family! All need to chill out. You have a long road ahead of you. Do not get into the mindset of jumping to the worst conclusion about people. Or certainly do not express negativity to your son. The healthy of his marriage will depend on everyone getting along. He can vent. But you'll have to listen, only listen and not add.

Did the groom talk about the 'passion' to his mom, or did the groom's mom spy on the lovebirds?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Eh. It doesn't matter that she told everyone. As the bride, or the other mother, I wouldn't mind at all.

However I agree that this indicates she's impulsive and tends to overshare. I might throw a word in my son's ear to warn him not to share too much confidential and private information with his in-laws... although maybe his wife will do that for him. It's something they'll need to figure out.

No, it's a big deal. Maybe it's okay for her to share, but it's not her decision—it's the son and daughter's decision.

MIL has to be a real harpy to think she has any right to share that beautiful news.

SMH. You guys are nuts. White people?

LOL reverse that, sis and see how it sits with you.

LOL Reverse society and see how the sits with you. Spoiler alert...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:They are so good together. It's been 2 years. They are 25 and 26. Soft and kind and respectful and passionate. I'm biased (a bit) but I think they will have a lovely marriage.

He asked her parents first. It was more an act of respect than it was a request for permission. They very happily gave their blessing.

And then the mom started demanding to know when the proposal was coming. My son was having the ring custom made and artists are flakey so it could be a month.

His future MIL has told pretty much all the family and I'm stunned the bride to be doesnt know yet.

I am livid.

Calm down. You've no more right to be livid in anger than she being silly in excitement. Don't ruin it for them by inserting your feelings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Eh. It doesn't matter that she told everyone. As the bride, or the other mother, I wouldn't mind at all.

However I agree that this indicates she's impulsive and tends to overshare. I might throw a word in my son's ear to warn him not to share too much confidential and private information with his in-laws... although maybe his wife will do that for him. It's something they'll need to figure out.

Ewww!!!! Don't throw any word in your son's ear or anyone's ear. You don't know her reasons. Why plant a seed of doubt against someone his beloved loves?